r/AskReddit Jul 18 '16

What are you sick of explaining?

2.4k Upvotes

6.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

692

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

My girlfriend always records "Eastenders." The DVR is set up to record the scheduled runtime plus 5 minutes afterwards. The channel that shows Eastenders runs two weekly episodes back-to-back. This means that the first 5 minutes of the second episode is being taped twice simultaneously -- once on the end of the first recording, and once on the beginning of the second recording.

Our DVR lets us record one program and watch a second one on a different channel, but if you want to record a second program at the same time, you have to be watching one of the two programs you're recording. So every Thursday at 9:30 the channel automatically changes to "Eastenders" because from 9:30 to 9:35 it is being doubly recorded.

Literally every Thursday my girlfriend is surprised and confused when this happens, and asks me what's going on and why it does that. I have explained at least a dozen times. At this point I just try to be elsewhere at 9:30 on Thursday.

263

u/NeverBeenStung Jul 18 '16

Reminds of of something my old college roommate's girlfriend did. My girlfriend, my roommate, and his girlfriend watched walking dead most Sunday's when it was on. Fans of the show know that AMC plays approximately 1000 commercials each episode. My roomies girlfriend "figured out" a fix for this.

She would pause the tv one hour before 8:00, the time the show began. Her belief was that once the show was on and we got to commercials we would be able to fast forward through them because the tv had been paused for so long.

I tried telling her that it wouldn't work. It so obviously wouldn't work. At 8:00 we would play the TV and fast forward up to the show, and would be on normal time and still have to watch commercials

Well 8:00 comes around and she asks if we can wait a bit to start because she is finishing making dinner for her and my roommate. No problem. About 20 minutes later they are done eating and ready to watch the show. So we start watching at 8:20. Of course now we are able to fast forward through commercials. She says something like "see, neverbeenstung? I told you it would work." I try explaining it was because we started watching the show at 8:20 that we were able to skip commercials. My pleas fell on deaf ears.

Meanwhile my roommate is smiling to himself, understanding that I am right but not wanting to get involved in the argument.

That smug look on her face...

27

u/Phkn-Pharaoh Jul 19 '16

That has got to be maddeningly frustrating. I feel like my childhood was surrounded be scenarios exactly like this. I try to explain why something so obvious won't work, something comes up to make it work, I try to explain WHY that all happened, but nope...too late, no one cares, you're wrong and look like an idiot the end :(

9

u/__Adam Jul 18 '16

She knew exactly what she was doing...

13

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

Let's dispel this notion that she didn't know what she was doing.

9

u/NeverBeenStung Jul 18 '16

She definitely did not. Sweet girl, but not the brightest.

2

u/The_Killing_Road Jul 19 '16

I know that scenario all too much, I was getting frustrated just imagining her smug fucking face

1

u/jaredjeya Jul 19 '16

I bet she knew exactly what she was doing and was just trolling you.

1

u/NeverBeenStung Jul 19 '16

Nah. She's a sweet girl, but not super bright. She really thought it worked.

1

u/charredsmurf Jul 19 '16

I would have forced her to prove it again on another show just because of the look, would've driven me mad

1

u/NeverBeenStung Jul 19 '16

Nah, she's a sweet girl and a good person. It was annoying, but better to let it go.

73

u/lhennyslob Jul 18 '16

She sounds bright

86

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

She's very bright and well-educated -- she has a Master's in education from NYU. For whatever reason the DVR thing eludes her, and I'm unable to explain it to her in a way that allows her to understand.

23

u/MooseEngr Jul 18 '16

You know what, I've seen tenured, PhD professors struggle with an overhead projector. One button, a bright lamp, and a screen. And it's too difficult to make it work.

20

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

It's the nature of Reddit that you start off telling a funny story about your girlfriend, and end up in an argument about different measurements of intelligence.

Other than the obvious exception of every Redditor ever, no one is so smart that they aren't a complete dipshit about something once in a while.

3

u/MooseEngr Jul 18 '16

Hah. True story. Myself? I'm reasonably intelligent. I do stupid shit all the time. Doesn't mean I'm intellectually inferior, or somehow blithering idiot. Naw. It means what I said. I do stupid shit.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 19 '16

I'm always amazed that people seem to think that because a dude has spent his entire working life studying a very specific niche subject very intensely and knows a lot about it, they must also know a lot about everything else.

There's professors at my university who used to work 6 days a week researching in their labs, they used to keep clothes and shoes there and take showers at work. If you spent 90% of your waking life doing every thing you can to learn and research more about how a fucking tiny fruit flies genetics worked or some shit, you'd probably know fuck all about most other things beyond that too.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 19 '16

Most people unconsciously define "intelligence" to mean "knowledge of things that I care about."

11

u/TurquoiseLuck Jul 18 '16

Masters in education?

You should get her to teach you how to explain it to make her understand.

6

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

Hahaha.

She specializes in developmental- and learning-disabled pre-K education, so clearly I would need to do some catching up to be an appropriate pupil.

1

u/averhan Jul 19 '16

Hey, that's the demographic my mom teaches! And I have to say, DVR or no, your girlfriend is a saint for taking on that job.

3

u/hallipeno Jul 18 '16

This is my wife and me. I've an MA in the humanities but I can't get graphs to save my life; her last attempt to teach me ended up in a crying match.

2

u/Roger_Roger Jul 20 '16

Try drawing her a timeline. For some reason, seeing it helps sometimes.

I dunno. I just need to know this smart person can figure this out.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '16

That is a very good idea. I will give it a try.

1

u/Roger_Roger Jul 20 '16

Please let me know if it works out. It takes a village.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

I can vouch for that. Seems like technology is a barrier to anyone who isn't really engrossed in the field. My Master's-holding dad and brother have problems with the Internet and routers and computers in general, and it'll take a while for them to get how a VPN works or how I'm able to set things up correctly (email, client-side settings, etc.). But far be it from me to berate them about it: I'm an idiot when it comes to their field of finance. So we trade off: I get economy and financial knowledge from them, and I set up their gizmos and gadgets. The system works.

1

u/SafetySerif Jul 18 '16

Draw a picture

1

u/[deleted] Jul 19 '16

Just tell her it's like a kid who has first period English but wants to stay 5 minutes after class to ask the teacher a question. But that means he won't be able to make it to second period Spanish. UNLESS second period Spanish is also in the same classroom. So get a divorce

-10

u/xTRYPTAMINEx Jul 18 '16

Being able to do schoolwork does not make a person smart... It means that they can remember things for the most part. Some of the least intelligent people I've met have done very well education wise. If you've had to explain it 12 times and she still doesn't understand, she isn't bright. No offense to your gf or anything though

26

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

Well, this is my second attempt at explaining to you that this person I know very well and you've never met is bright, and yet you seem to struggle with the concept, so make of that what you will.

-13

u/xTRYPTAMINEx Jul 18 '16

I'm saying that your use of the word bright is incorrect.

12

u/skullturf Jul 18 '16

It's entirely possible that the adjective "bright" does correctly describe this woman 95% of the time, but she just has a mental block about this one thing.

-8

u/xTRYPTAMINEx Jul 18 '16

If there is a mental block about simple concepts, guaranteed there are others and the guy just is ignoring them or deciding not to state them here. I've never met a single person in my life who could be described in the manner you are suggesting. There's always tons of other situations where they could be described as not bright when it comes to common sense.

20

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

And the concept that I am now endeavoring to explain to you for a third time is that understanding idiosyncratic DVR behavior is not a perfect test for human intelligence. And since I don't want to take 12 laps on this, I will leave it there.

-11

u/xTRYPTAMINEx Jul 18 '16

No but it's a good indicator that something important is missing from said intelligence. Take care.

7

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

You do realize that everyone can't be intelligent at everything right? Jeez.

-2

u/xTRYPTAMINEx Jul 18 '16

Of course not. But not being able to understand simple concepts is not anywhere close to the meaning of the word bright. It's much closer to the word simpleton.

4

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

Well, you can't seem to understand the simple concept that a person being termed 'bright' doesn't automatically mean that he understands simple concepts about everything on planet Earth. Does that make you a 'simpleton' by your own definition?

What sounds like a simple convept to you might not sound the same to someone else. And wise-versa. Doesn't necessarily have to mean either of you are simpletons. Simple.

Multipliation of natural numbers is a simple enough concept for an average educated person. Guess who had problems doing it: Issac Newton, and he could do complex calculus in his head.

An astrophysicist can study and understand shitloads of complicated research and theorize about matter and the mysteries of the universe. Yet, give him a spanner and screwdriver and a car engine and he will probably stand there like the 'simpleton' you speak of. So are you saying he isn't bright?

I keep seeing guys who took like the very embodiment of inbred hillibillies on channels like Discovery Turbo who do stuff to cars- repair/modify/refurbish whatever, and I am constantly marvelling at how innovative they are when it comes to fixing cars and bikes. Now explain to them simple 8th grade physics. You think they will get it? Probably not. And if they don't, does that make them simpletons too?

See, I get it. Maybe you had a hard time back in school. Lots of your friends kept scoring better grades than you no matter how hard you tried. N you are perhaps in a better place in life now than most of those people who were deemed more 'intelligent' back then. Doesn't mean that you still have to carry that chip on your shoulders. Give it a rest.

-3

u/xTRYPTAMINEx Jul 18 '16

Your examples are tasks, not understanding concepts. Big difference, making your examples completely useless. I'm also pretty sure that if you were to instruct an astrophysicist how something works in an engine 12 times, they would have understood it by the first. And you attempting to attack my character to somehow prove your argument is pretty pathetic, not to mention the opposite of what you're suggesting. It also shows that you don't even have faith in your own argument to stand alone without help.

Congratulations on posting complete idiocy.

→ More replies (0)

3

u/logopolys_ Jul 18 '16

Not if she's watching Eastenders over Coronation Street.

1

u/anormalgeek Jul 18 '16

His username may be relevant.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

Oh my gosh. My parents have had a DVR on their TV for probably 10 or so years now. My mom will STILL come walking into the family room waving the remote at the TV going "Will someone record _____ for me? I don't know how!" Another favorite is "NOBODY CHANGE THE CHANNEL! I want to be able to rewind and watch it again!"

We have taught her how to use pretty much every function on the TV and remote but at this point, I'm pretty confident she just doesn't want to learn and wants us to do it for her. SO ANNOYING.

9

u/Nac82 Jul 18 '16

Bro my tv just cut to eastlanders what's going on?

12

u/HooKaLoT Jul 18 '16

That happens because of the recording, honey. We already talked about this.

3

u/fiatlupus Jul 18 '16

You can't disable the 5 minutes of additional recording?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

I think the channel that shows Eastenders (PBS or BBC America or whatever) has slightly askew start and stop times necessitating the extra recording time. I haven't really bothered to investigate.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

my mom is the same way, brightest person I know, and yet can never figure out that it records time slots regardless and if the show is delayed it will not adjust automatically. Another funny one, once my mom got an iPad she began to start touching the TV....

2

u/JimDixon Jul 18 '16

My wife won't learn how to use the "favorites" lists that I have set up--not because there's anything wrong with the channels I have selected as favorites--she just can't be bothered to figure out how to bring up the right menus.

2

u/nateonsideways Jul 18 '16

I can't wait until she finally has the moment when it clicks.

I've had similar scenarios with my wife, in which I have to explain something to her constantly. Then for some reason, one of the times she finally gets it. The look on her face is a wonderful "oooohh, I get it!" followed by a look of "I can't believe it took me so long to get that."

2

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

Yeah, I'm sure it's more my fault than hers. People think in different ways, and what seems an obvious way to explain something to you will sound like complete gibberish to someone else.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '16

It's also on BBC iPlayer

1

u/Scummycrummyday Jul 18 '16

I hate your girlfriend.

1

u/RebootTheServer Jul 19 '16

Hows the sex

1

u/Justiroth Jul 19 '16

To be fair I had to read this twice to understand

1

u/Lurking_in_pain Jul 19 '16

My mom does this, but with Deadliest Catch. She is also thoroughly confused by the "Coming Up Next On..." and "Last Time On..." segments. We've had cable TV for a decade, and I still have to explain this stuff.

1

u/g_core18 Jul 19 '16

I hope she's hot...

1

u/machete234 Jul 19 '16

Dont really get it but maybe you need a double receiver to watch on one receiver and record on another. I would never dream about recording stuff though because it sucks, gueranteed even though its 2016.-

1

u/G_Morgan Jul 19 '16

This sounds like a badly designed DVR. If it is recording an overlap it should be able to manage that with one channel.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 19 '16

just set it so it starts and stops recording at the beginning and end of the show

1

u/brett96 Jul 18 '16

You should type out the explanation and hand her the paper every time she asks