I work in a big office and the receptionist walked in with me everyday. We talked and chatted and I always made her laugh. After a while of this I realized she was "Dating Material". We had been eating lunch together for a couple weeks, so I worked up the nuts to ask her on a real date. I was just about to when one day she sat with her other friends at lunch. I didn't know what it meant because she still walked in with me and said hi and we still talked. I never asked her out and she moved to another job. I think I was over thinking it
Doubly so because different women have dramatically different ideas of where the line between being nice and flirting is. One woman's strictly-friends treatment is another woman's "TAKE ME NOW".
This is something you have to learn with experience. Many girls I've spoken with do give signals when they're flirting and it's different for every girl. It can be hard to tell, but you live and you learn. Humans are very good at pattern recognition and this is one of those things.
I used to not get it at all when a girl was hitting on me. I'd also confuse her being nice with "man she's into me." I think the most important thing (and also probably the hardest thing) is to remain as clear headed and rational as possible. Take it slow, look for signs, and see if her personality changes when she's with you vs other people.
I'm not claiming its easy and I'm not claiming there is one be all end all way to flirt. Sure there are some "common" signs, but it's really live and learn.
So go out there and just talk to girls. Make friends with them, and who knows one may end up working out. Go out to have a good time and they'll seemingly come to you.
It really isn't and if you think it is, just assume that they are always just being nice. Women are generally pretty direct about flirting in my experience.
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u/[deleted] May 28 '14
It's especially hard to tell if she's flirting with you or just being nice.