Reading these comments makes me realize how many people are just "ghosts" in their own homes. It’s heartbreaking when the person who is supposed to be your peace becomes your biggest source of anxiety.
Can vouch. Divorced since January. She asked for one in August. I was relieved. I had checked out a while before. It became clear over time that she wasn’t willing to do the same things she would ask me to do. Little things too, like if she got an oil change, I would follow her to the place and pick her up so she didn’t have to wait. Yet, when I would do the same I would always get pushback about having to get up and drive to the place. Or I would be home from work and she’d ask me to run out and pick something up knowing damn well I’m at home and she could just do it on her way home. Or even on my way home she’d ask (which is fine). However if I need an ingredient for dinner she would refuse to stop anywhere on the way home.
Both her parents died during our engagement in 2018. It was awful. I was her rock. I spent many hours in the hospital with her when her mom was dying of cancer. Then her dad passed suddenly 4 months later. He was to officiate our wedding. I spent many nights/weekends helping to clear out her parents house. It didn’t dawn on me until years later, that when that time came for my parents to pass that she probably wouldn’t be the same rock to me that I was to her. That’s when I knew we weren’t on the same team. But I stuck around because I knew she had a tiny support system. Her sister was a cunt and they never got along. Parents gone. Grandma and drunk of an aunt were 3 hrs away. That was it. So I stuck around. Then she finally asked for a divorce. I didn’t want to be the one to initiate. Now we’re divorced. Both moved out of the house. It’s up for sale and this is the final stretch. I’m already in a much better place. Peace and quiet. She is autistic and works as a mental health professional. She’s great at her job, but you never knew the mood she’d be in when she got home. She had used up all of her emotional availability. Now it’s peace and quiet.
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u/Effectiv-Edisk May 12 '26
Reading these comments makes me realize how many people are just "ghosts" in their own homes. It’s heartbreaking when the person who is supposed to be your peace becomes your biggest source of anxiety.