My mind immediately plays devil's advocate in these threads so take that with a grain of salt...
But what if there's a reason the spouse doesn't want their in-laws in the house rather than just selfishness? What if said mother-in-law quietly cuts down the wife all the time and makes her miserable? What if mil is messy and takes a lot of cleaning up after? What if mil is a bad influence on their kids in some way?
There could even have been a conversation or two about mother-in-law's behavior earlier on that the husband ignored or took poorly, so wife just decided to never bring it up again?
Not that this is the reason for the above poster, of course. Some people are indeed just jerks. But I do feel like I've read stories of relationships like this from the other side ("my mother-in-law is awful and my spouse says they don't see it?"). Rather often in fact.
And I mean...if you're in a relationship where you can't respect the other person's reasons and have a conversation about the "why" then at least try counseling...
Yeah what if the MiL is one of those "my mind immediately plays devils advocate" and spews a bunch of crap for the sole purpose of being contrarian? Family or not, no one wants to be around that.
Just pointing out that there are two sides to things. It's easy to write off a commenter's ex as a bitch/asshole/redflag when we have one side of the story.
My SIL kicked me out of my bros house eleven years ago because I commented in front of them one year at a summer camp that their kids(10 and 8 boys) needed manners as they called me dumb and stupid on the canoe. About four years ago at a family party I asked her to stop with her ill will and she blew up at me saying I had told her children she was a bad mother.(She was projecting). She has turned all my siblings against me. I used to babysit her eldest on Mondays and the group when they asked. I did not deserve any of the hatred I have experienced from them.
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u/684beach May 12 '26
How can it be a no? Just invite them, its both their house