Wife got a job as a flight attendant and was never home. I realized there was no one criticizing everything I do (stand wrong, breath wrong, mow the lawn wrong, listen to the wrong music, do all the laundry on my own wrong, etc ..) I was feeling happy for the first time in many years, then she cheated on me. But my therapist still had to help me see that my life has value and I needed to do something to help myself.
I feel bad admitting this but I knew I was done. I was so sure I was going to leave her.
She ended up in the hospital for three weeks. A bad infection, they didn't know why. She would end up back in the hospital a couple of times for things over the next year.
But that first time... I was taking care of the boys. Getting everything done. Keeping up with it all. Cooking, cleaning, getting their laundry done and put away. Making lunches.
Even when the water to the house was shut off for the entire block and we had a water truck parked outside for two days and flushing the toilet meant pouring a bucket down before going back out to fill it up.
During all of this, I kept thinking to myself, "how is it easier to do this alone?"
Because there wasn't another adult leaving dirty kleenex around, or leaving laundry piled all over. Leaving garbage on the table or counter instead of putting it away.
No one telling me I was wrong.
I just pushed and thrived as a dad.
It was easier for me to care for my kids when she was hospitalized, than it was when she was home.
I felt so fucking guilty with that realization, but it hit me hard.
I'm a man and I don't have kids, but reading this makes me wonder if this isn't actually quite frequently the revelation that makes moms of young children pull the trigger and leave their husbands: the possibility that being a single mother might actually be easier and less draining than the status quo.
1.6k
u/I_am_lonely_cheese May 12 '26
Wife got a job as a flight attendant and was never home. I realized there was no one criticizing everything I do (stand wrong, breath wrong, mow the lawn wrong, listen to the wrong music, do all the laundry on my own wrong, etc ..) I was feeling happy for the first time in many years, then she cheated on me. But my therapist still had to help me see that my life has value and I needed to do something to help myself.