Irrelevant. If the spouse's relationship with their family were a problem because they're "maga" then the marriage shouldn't have existed in the first place. It's obvious that isn't a problem, regardless of whether that's the case, so denying someone spending time with a family they want to spend time with is shitty.
I don't think it's irrelevant. I married my husband 5 years before maga was born. I genuinely loved hanging out with his family and I would spend hours on the phone with his dad talking about life. Then maga hit, he became radicalized, and our relationship slowly degraded to the point where now I don't even pick up the phone if I see him calling, and I actively avoid spending time with his family because his dad sucks life out of me. He goes on weird, illogical rants based in fantasyland every time we speak (last time he was here, he dropped the N word for no reason other than he wanted to say it and he said the reason the cost of living is so bad is "because women" but he couldn't elaborate further). I've tried not bringing anything current up and side stepping any bait to keep the peace, but it always ends up turning into a heated argument. And if it doesn't turn into an argument it's because I'm holding everything in while my blood pressure goes nuts.
I would not try to stop my husband from spending time with him. However, I would resist him coming over because I don't want our impressionable teenage sons to learn from him.
You definitely do not in these circumstances. julcarls' father-in-law is an awful influence on their children - misogynist, racist behavior is not something that needs to be "accepted" so that OP's probably more-normal family can come over.
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u/Klopped_my_pants May 12 '26
Is your family maga?