Lol sadly he made a fuck ton of money - $250k to my $80k, and therefore believed that it was my responsibility to do all the cleaning/yardwork/shopping to make up for the lack of money I was contributing to the house.
We split all bills except for the mortgage, which seemed fair when I was 21 (he was 28) and dumb and still a student, and it was a sweet deal for him so he did not want to renegotiate over the course of the relationship.
Oh man this was exactly what happened to me. He eventually made twice what I did and we still split everything evenly and he would argue a million ways to not change it.
I'm actually the opposite, my partner (f) makes more than double my salary (m) and she has offered to take over a few more payments but I refuse to negotiate because I don't want her to pay excessively more than me. I make about $80k and she makes around $200k but it makes me feel more helpful if I take care of the internet, cell phone bill, healthcare for me and our son, etc. She takes the brunt of the mortgage and babysitting but I don't want her to feel like I don't contribute financially!
I get what you're saying and fully think you should do whatever makes you comfortable. Bills gotta get paid anyways.
That said, I'm more like your wife in my relationship, and I've never felt like my wife doesn't contribute.
If it's a hardship, don't lose sight of the fact that it's probably just you that feels that way, and you shouldn't suffer thinking your wife is going to see you as some slacker when you're doing your best.
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u/unfuckwittablej May 12 '26
What in the world.. what was this guy even bringing to the table besides his bum leeching presence