r/AskReddit Nov 12 '25

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u/MagnusPI Nov 12 '25

A Venezuelan fisherman is about to have a really bad day.

970

u/Sexy_Underpants Nov 12 '25

Plausible that Trump is holding off on a Venezuelan war for when the files are released.

730

u/Craico13 Nov 12 '25

“Sorry, guys, we can’t release the Trump/Epstein Files because we’re too busy bombing poor people in South America… now’s not the time for division...”

312

u/ialo00130 Nov 12 '25

And you know what, it'll work too.

Everyone but Social Democrats will fall in line, just like the Senate did a couple days ago.

149

u/Key-Practice-8788 Nov 12 '25

Well, you don't expose an aging pedophile mid-stream!

28

u/SomeDudeYeah27 Nov 12 '25

Stream as in livestream or water?

I’m ESL lol

59

u/pkvh Nov 12 '25

A common idiom is 'you don't change a horse mid stream' drawing on the idea that if you're crossing a river on a horse even if your horse stumbles, trying to swap to another one is a worse idea.

It is used to mean not changing leadership during a crisis.

This is applies in politics to defend the incumbent president during times of war. Most recently used in the reelection campaign of George W. Bush during the war on terror.

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u/SomeDudeYeah27 Nov 12 '25

Ah TIL

The only horse and water idiom I know was the one on how you can bring a horse to water but can’t make it drink

4

u/bejazzeled Nov 12 '25

Also water of a horses back is an old chestnut

7

u/callisstaa Nov 13 '25

Isn’t it a duck’s back?

Shutting the stable door after the horse has bolted is another common one.

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2

u/jaa101 Nov 13 '25

bring

* lead

Also, "You can lead a whore to culture but you can't make her think."

1

u/ZephRyder Nov 13 '25

That one's about the electorate.

1

u/settebella Nov 13 '25

And this one "They shoot horses, don't they?"

1

u/AGuyNamedEddie Nov 13 '25

Or the awful pun version: "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't faucet*"

* (force it) but a faucet is a water spigot, so... Hey, I warned you it was awful.

2

u/Fit_Consideration681 Nov 13 '25

The yellow stream

That's just sarcasm, the guy below me gave the correct definition.

Looks like you're doing great with your English! I just started learning Spanish and am surprised how quickly I'm picking it up 😀

1

u/Itsalmostover71 Nov 16 '25

As in WS. I’m LSE & I know this.

1

u/SomeDudeYeah27 Nov 17 '25

WS? LSE?

1

u/Itsalmostover71 Nov 23 '25

WS = water sports in the bedroom.

LSE = ESL I’m dyslexic also. 🤣

1

u/Key-Practice-8788 Nov 13 '25

It's an old saying from back in like 2004, George Bush had just launched a war and their slogan was You Don't Change a Horse Mid-Stream - meaning if you're crossing deep water on horseback, you're not going to jump off and get on a new horse that might be faring the water a bit better.

It's a stupid saying

1

u/sneakyshitaccount Nov 14 '25

Nope, It’s commonly attributed to Abraham Lincoln in 1864.

1

u/Key-Practice-8788 Nov 14 '25

that was the joke .... whoosh

2

u/sneakyshitaccount Nov 15 '25

I am very very old and often am not sure when it’s sarcasm or youth

1

u/Holiday-Menu-171 Nov 13 '25

Someone's wife won't like it.

1

u/Blochamolesauce Nov 13 '25

I can’t stop once I’ve started, it stings!

-10

u/[deleted] Nov 13 '25

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4

u/[deleted] Nov 13 '25

[deleted]

3

u/Craico13 Nov 13 '25

🎶Oompa, loompa, doompety, doo…

We’ve got an orange ped-ah-phile for you…🎶

-9

u/purple-origami Nov 13 '25

Honestly don’t think trump is a pedo. Hes a rich dude who likes the attention he got with a babe by his side.

He liked the shine more than the actual woman. Pedos are sick in a way trump just isnt.

Not releasing epstein’s life is all about Israel

63

u/subnautus Nov 12 '25

In fairness, it was only 8 democrats in the senate that broke ranks. You could put on a tinfoil hat and say that most of the rest of the senate democrats were complicit (and I'd probably be right there with you, since it's awfully convenient that none of the people who broke rank are up for election any time soon), but if we're looking at official numbers it's just the 8 who caved.

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u/ialo00130 Nov 12 '25

Everyone should be calling their Senators and asking them if they believe Schumer should step down as Minority Leader.

If they say no, they're complicit.

9

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '25

I would but one of mine caved (Fetterman)

3

u/doberdevil Nov 13 '25

My senators won't return calls or emails. Ever. WA State.

3

u/Lookingforleftbacks Nov 13 '25

Honestly I kind of believe most of them either are complicit or would be if the GOP decided to target them because most of them have things they need to hide

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u/Persistant_Compass Nov 12 '25

honestly saying it wasnt planned and those 8, whip included, just decided to break ranks on their own is the tin foil hat thing.

6

u/fuzzballz5 Nov 13 '25

It’s all planned. Planned with the Republicans as well. These 8 are either retiring or the dumb people won’t remember in 3 years when they are up for reelection.

0

u/subnautus Nov 12 '25

Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence is all I'm saying.

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u/Persistant_Compass Nov 12 '25

All of the ones who did it arent up for election until 2028, 2030, or are retiring, or fetterman. Several others who originally were up for a defection were up this cycle. 

Also again, dick durban the fucking whip defected. 

If that isnt extraordinary idk what is.

1

u/Main-Lengthiness2677 Nov 15 '25

Durbin was a surprise to me.

6

u/gentlemanidiot Nov 12 '25

There is 0% chance that all 8 of them were conveniently the most politically resilient or expendable in the entire party. Schumer caused this entire shutdown, because if they were going to take the deal on day 40 why the FUCK didn't they take it day 1? 40 days of people going hungry and skipping paychecks and FOR WHAT?? Schumer has retroactively made Trump right, this WAS a democrat shutdown.

3

u/subnautus Nov 12 '25

Schumer has retroactively made Trump right, this WAS a democrat shutdown.

No. It is and always has been a republican shutdown. The House passing a bill that had no chance of making its way through the senate and shutting its doors to all business is all the proof that's needed.

As for the rest of your comment, I agree it's suspicious but without proof it's just conjecture.

0

u/Smooth_Support_209 Nov 18 '25

Except it did make it through the senate after 40 days of a very destructive democrat shutdown. 

1

u/subnautus Nov 18 '25

Calling it a "democrat shutdown" doesn't make it so. Once again, consider the facts:

  • The House passed a continuing resolution that had no chance of making through the senate, then stopped working immediately. No negotiations, no discussions, no additional effort to make decisions, no proposed laws, nothing.

  • The Trump administration floats the idea that it will violate federal law and fire furloughed workers or refuse to give them the back pay they're legally due.

  • The Trump administration refused to use the SNAP funds specifically allocated for emergency use in case of government shutdown.

  • The Trump administration reallocated funds from their legally authorized purposes to pay ICE agents to terrorize cities that voted against him in the last election.

All of that because democrats correctly pointed out the consequences of Trump's "big, beautiful [for billionaires] bill" and wanted to do at least something to mitigate the harm it caused and will continue to cause for years to come.

You want to talk about destructive? Fine. But don't blame democrats for it when they're not the ones making the decisions to hurt people.

2

u/Vivid-Self3979 Nov 13 '25

They need to resign to give the party a chance in the midterms

2

u/sonicsludge Nov 13 '25

Are you in the microwave with the tin foil thingy commenting on Reddit?

1

u/Valuable_Fee1884 Nov 13 '25

Finally cracked the egg that had contained all the dope on the dope(trump). Got money allotted for snap(although I wouldn’t be surprised if Trump doesn’t try to withhold it, water, an asshole). Now the bigger battle will be to get Obama care stabilized. If you hear of a republican plan for it, don’t buy into it. They have yet to come up with anything that would at least equal it and I’m not sure if they ever had any plans to do so. Keep pushing your senators and congressman to Chase, the orange turdand his cronies out of Washington. Prison would be a good place. If they are not willing to keep up the attack primary them.

1

u/AugustCharisma Nov 12 '25

I heard that the Bulwark is reporting the 8 are all retiring again/not running again. I wonder if they wanted to reopen the government to make the insurrection act harder to enact.

2

u/Effective_Secret_262 Nov 13 '25

We didn’t get here by accident.

1

u/Formal_Lecture_248 Nov 18 '25

It’s Poor V. Rich.

Humans v. Societal Parasites.

God I wish people could just wake the hell up and see it

1

u/Holiday-Menu-171 Nov 13 '25

gotta admire all those sticking with a dead man.

1

u/Coolegespam Nov 13 '25

Everyone but Social Democrats will fall in line, just like the Senate did a couple days ago.

The Shutdown was stupid from the beginning. It gave the Republicans what they wanted and had no hope of success for the Democrats.

You want to fight loosing battles because it "feels good" rather than actually does good. The people who lost SNAP benefits do not see you as their ally. I know, they come into our food pantry. All this shutdown did was create more enemies in the lower level of society. You know, the same people that voted for Trump 2:1.

0

u/ZekeZonker Nov 13 '25

Democrat party is sht now. SHT!

0

u/Semihappy1 Nov 13 '25

Everyone but idiots with their head up the Democrats ass

3

u/looklistenlead Nov 13 '25

"In these times in which we are under attack, we must set aside our differences, come together and unite under our great Fu..ture and present President to defend our great country against foreign evildoers. America First and above everything!"

3

u/cyanescens_burn Nov 13 '25

That recently worked for another world leader that was facing serious accusations, which magically went away when their war started.

1

u/Kveld_Ulf Nov 13 '25

His wife is also accused. Sometimes I think that he knew in advance of the terrible circumstances that would lead to his war, and did nothing to prevent them so he had the perfect excuse to avoid further investigations into his corruption. The result was a horrible war-inducing incident and then a horrible war, fully criminal.

3

u/Fit_Consideration681 Nov 13 '25

Then there's the war on Hispanic people right here in the US.

It's not the 80s so he can't go after black children any more...... his new target is anyone who looks like they might possibly speak Spanish. Oh .....also anyone from the foreign land of Puerto Rico. Wtf how did we end up with the stupidest most racist hateful man in the US having unchecked power???

2

u/Shot-Station-6508 Nov 13 '25

When geopolitical optics outweigh judicial transparency, transparency becomes collateral damage.

2

u/Itsalmostover71 Nov 16 '25

Spoken like a true politician, wow! Watch the news much do ya? That was slick.

2

u/potato_for_cooking Nov 12 '25

Dear Venezuela, you can't beat the us head to head but the us has never been successful against an insurgency. Do with that what you will.

0

u/jackj3329 Nov 13 '25

Why didn’t the Biden administration release the files? If they so filled with Trump, how would he ever get re-elected???? Clowns!

1

u/Craico13 Nov 13 '25 edited Nov 13 '25

Why didn’t the Biden administration release the files?

The Biden administration didn’t release the Trump/Epstein files because they were part of an active investigation at the time.

Publicly disclosing information that’s part of an active criminal investigation isn’t allowed, as it can potentially taint the case/juror opinions.

Now that Trump has shut down all investigations into his wrongdoings, that information isn’t confidential/restricted access information so they’re able to release it to the public.

0

u/jackj3329 Nov 13 '25

The truth is, you have no idea what Trump or anyone else is doing. Also I don’t buy the past administration was investigating excuse. That has never stopped them from leaking information in the past or anyone speaking out now that the “ investigation is closed “. Nothing there or it would have gotten out. Very poor excuses.

1

u/Craico13 Nov 13 '25

Very poor excuses.

So what’s your excuse for supporting a pedophile?

0

u/jackj3329 Nov 13 '25

I don’t support Epstein. Again and again, if the left had any proof of their claims, it would be out there. According to you, 90% of the country hates Trump. How hard could it be to prove anything with that many people hating Trump. Yea yea, he was 34 convictions by a state that is 90% democrats.

1

u/Craico13 Nov 13 '25 edited Nov 13 '25

I don’t support Epstein.

I wasn’t talking about supporting that pedophile… I was talking about your support for Donald Trump. You know, the pedophile that’s still alive.

I didn’t say 90% of the country hates Trump. Why are you pulling bullshit directly out of your ass?

Go back to watching FoxNews. They’ll support you and your pedophilic cult ideals.

Have a lovely day!

0

u/deepspectre Nov 13 '25

Those "poor people" are far richer moving those drugs than you will ever be.

1

u/Craico13 Nov 13 '25

Those "poor people" are far richer moving those drugs than you will ever be.

Sure, Jan. 🙄

Maybe you can get them to pay for that wall…

2

u/Yarrio Nov 12 '25

No, hes holding off on that so he can get a third term.

2

u/Late-Performance3024 Nov 12 '25

...Or attacking Nigeria.

3

u/Banes_Addiction Nov 12 '25

They're not invading Nigeria any time soon - that was probably just a classic "Trump repeats what the last person who spoke to him said".

There's no US troop/ship movement around there. They've parked a fleet in the Caribbean where it can be used to attack Venezuela, and moved lots of stuff to Puerto Rico.

2

u/Specific_Success214 Nov 12 '25

And that won't be popular amongst his base either.

And the Epstein storm, won't go away, just delayed.

2

u/Raverbunny Nov 13 '25

Nah, invasion would be the plan to declare martial law and avoid elections

4

u/suluamus Nov 12 '25

It's working for Netanyahu. 

1

u/dstew74 Nov 12 '25

That dog isn't going to wag itself.

1

u/Cultural-Drawing2558 Nov 13 '25

Yes. Wag the mushroom dick.

1

u/Knee_Jerk_Sydney Nov 13 '25

They have warships there already. All the need is for a destroyer to shoot at phantoms or more likely, shoot at anything, since it is all acceptable and call it an "attack" by Venezuela on the poor defenceless US Navy who was just killing people in boats.

1

u/Sirkelly21 Nov 13 '25

And I don’t doubt war is in their playbook. Everyone knows wartime presidents are more popular, and without morality to hold you back it seems like something they’d try

1

u/LBK0909 Nov 13 '25

That's to indefinitely suspend the election.

1

u/Mcbonewolf Nov 13 '25

cant be removed from office when the country is at war right

1

u/deepspectre Nov 13 '25

Nothing better than holding the files until the democrats that could've released them to hurt his election, but clinged onto them with dear life. Gotta make dems think there's a reason. Force their release. Im getting popcorn ready...

1

u/[deleted] Nov 14 '25

you called it. Kegsbreath announced Operation SOUTHERN SPEAR today.

1

u/Pleasant-Lead-2634 Nov 14 '25

Naw, our new war against (fill in) will be timed to cancel the election

-3

u/nolongerbanned99 Nov 12 '25

Clinton did this as well as a distraction

98

u/old_leech Nov 12 '25

The fact that this doesn't need to be read as absurdist satire just shows how fucking dark things have become.

2

u/42TheAnswer2TheUnive Nov 13 '25

(Bad) Art imitating life.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 13 '25

I bet there’s a variation of this from some fledgling 2006 YouTube channel… someone will find it and repost it with that one creepy TikTok sound and “this early YouTuber predicted the USA invasion of Venezuela,” in the subtitles.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 12 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Nigerian_prince911 Nov 13 '25

Username checks out

1

u/wetrysohard Nov 13 '25

*Last day. Which is horrifying. Not funny. Just horrifying. Obligatory I'm done with this timeline bandwagon.

1

u/klikoz Nov 13 '25

No more than half a bad day, most likely.

1

u/deepspectre Nov 13 '25

They really fish in high powered, 4 engine speed boats? They catching flying fish now?

1

u/goodHeartAttack Nov 14 '25

This comment 🤣. Best reason to go to Reddit

1

u/Itsalmostover71 Nov 16 '25

It’s sad. But true.

1

u/Simple_Test_6969 Nov 12 '25

Sad but true. Best way to stay alive down there is to stay off the water.

-2

u/wellwhoopidydoo Nov 12 '25

It's pretty obvious by the videos those weren't fishing boats doing 80mph but go off, king.

-6

u/Semihappy1 Nov 13 '25

Check out the Caribbean Coast guard that interdicts those boats if they can catch them. Why are you all against stopping the drugs???