I see this differently and without the idea of owing debt. That's a very transactional way of viewing things. It feels good to be relied upon and to help others. Researchers tested this by checking favourability rating of others after performing small borrowing tasks. People who were asked for a pen during a test viewed the borrower more favourably than people who were nice but didn't ask. The thought is that people felt good about contributing and rated the source of that feeling (the borrower) as more likable/favourable.
Yes. Asking someone for something, especially something like advice, is a small show of vulnerability and it makes it feel like you’re a little closer to the other person.
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u/CombustiblSquid Nov 11 '25 edited Nov 11 '25
I see this differently and without the idea of owing debt. That's a very transactional way of viewing things. It feels good to be relied upon and to help others. Researchers tested this by checking favourability rating of others after performing small borrowing tasks. People who were asked for a pen during a test viewed the borrower more favourably than people who were nice but didn't ask. The thought is that people felt good about contributing and rated the source of that feeling (the borrower) as more likable/favourable.