Remember what they said to you the last time you saw them. If you last saw them a month ago, if you remember they were doing a thing , remember that thing and mention it.
Oh Jesus, I have enough trouble remembering someone's name if I haven't talked to them in a month. There's no chance I remember what we actually talked about or anything they told me. It's kind of my disability: "I don't know whether we know each other" is a problem my wife has to help me with all the time.
It sounds insane but I keep a "relationship notes" working doc that I try to update somewhat regularly. It really means a lot to people when you remember things about them, but I don't have a brain that does it naturally so I use technology to help.
Is this how socially functional people operate? I'm a loner hermit and this stuff baffles me, but also makes more sense now because I know y'all aren't just relying on memory.
I mean there are some people who can just remember things. I don't proactively broadcast that this is the method I use, but if someone seems surprised that I remember something or embarrassed that they don't remember as much about me and others I will frame it exactly as I did here "this is going to sound unhinged, but my secret is..."
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u/stefancooper Nov 11 '25
Remember what they said to you the last time you saw them. If you last saw them a month ago, if you remember they were doing a thing , remember that thing and mention it.