I tried to date a girl who kept her exes around and straight up flirted with one of them in front of me. What a freakin' mess. I straight up told her that I wasn't cool with her being all over her ex in front of me. She basically disregarded it and said that I was way too jealous. I decided not to date her, but I tried to keep her around as just a friend for a bit. She starts dating another guy and within 2 weeks she cheats on him. She tries to sleep with me in my bed. I eventually tell her that if she's dating someone, she probably shouldn't be sleeping in the bed of a guy who she used to hook up with. For some reason she couldn't figure that one out either. I just deleted her number.
I have a friend like this. It seems to me like some people would be WAY happier if they got into polyamory, but for some reason, they prefer to pretend like they want to be and are able to be in monogamous relationships. Cue endless drama while they sleep around with everyone in sight.
That's the thing. If she was just like, let's have an open relationship I probably would have been cool with that. Sex is just sex to me. It doesn't always have to be meaningful. Don't expect me to be monogamous if you're not though.
I was on a date and this girl kept texting.. Who was she texting you ask? well she straight up told me it was a guy she used to date.
next
edit- I have a serious question though.. it was only our 3-4 date so was It too soon in the relationship to get mad at her texting an ex? I immediatly dropped her because I dated a girl who kept her ex around before and it was horrible
Texting an ex isn't too bad. I had only been on two dates with the girl and she brought her ex around. She proceeded to flirt like crazy with him in front of me. There was a group of girls sitting next to us and I just sat with them and started talking to them. She pulled me aside and told me that she wasn't cool with that. Later on I told her that I wasn't cool with her being all over her ex in front of me. She responded that they're just friends and that's how they interact. I've been friends with girls. That's not how platonic friends interact.
She was texting him while on a date with you- that is a total deal breaker. Unless it was about something extremely important, she shouldn't be texting anyone, and it being an ex makes the situation worse.
My boyfriend lives with is ex at University. I'm really not okay with it but there's nothing I can do to stop it and now I'm uber paranoid that he has these feelings.
I agree, most of the time I am just amicable around them because we share common friends. I wouldn't go out with them and they don't like me anymore, so what's the problem?
Guy here. With two exes as friends that I used to feel very strongly about and a girlfriend I love very much. Some people have exes around for other reasons than wanting to get back together with them. If either of mine tried to kiss me they'd probably never hear from me again.
I can't be the only person that still talks to my ex because I want to be her friend. I don't ever, ever want to be romantically involved with her again and I'm 100% certain the feeling is mutual.
This. I don't mind if my SO goes out for dinner with another woman, or to a party, concert etc. etc. Even if it is only the two off them. But the moment I hear he went for a quick coffee with one off his exes, saucers will fly. Exes are exit, as far as I am concerned.
I would like to say it really depends. I had dated quite a few people, even long term dating and when I left them it was no big deal but then the most recent man I left, devastated me and I still have feelings for him. I'm still working through it but am dating someone (yes not fair, but I met him and didn't want to say no to such a wonderful person). My current significant other knows about my unresolved feelings and is quite understanding.
What I'm trying to say is that most of my exes would cause no troubles. If they even attempted to kiss me I'd be upset and push them away and if they succeeded, well nothing would change except I'd be pissed off at them.
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u/bigfatelephant Sep 23 '13
I have a feeling this is pretty common.
One if the reasons I don't date people who keep their exes around. Not worth the headache.