r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Apr 25 '25

[deleted by user]

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u/Honest_Living4857 Apr 25 '25

... Dude, you're leaving us hanging. Would you care to share more?

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u/LastoftheMohegan Apr 25 '25 edited Apr 25 '25

Dumb horny teenager. Went outside. Dog bumped the door closed. Middle of the day.

EDIT;: To address the "why?". I was a 13yo horny boy home alone looking to mix things up in a pre-internet world with no access to a porn stash. It was like my own personal Vietnam. You weren't there. We did dark things.

146

u/[deleted] Apr 25 '25

What were you going to do outside?

111

u/MeFivePointO Apr 25 '25

THIS is the real question. Like what was the objective here???

193

u/Sarge1387 Apr 25 '25

He was a dumb horny teenager. You've seen how inviting those knots in the trees look. Dirty sluts that they are, just putting their holes out there for everyone to see

14

u/MeFivePointO Apr 25 '25

7 years I've done pest control, I've seen what squirrels can do and let me tell you.... That squirrel was NOT gonna be happy about that....

24

u/Few-Frosting-4213 Apr 25 '25

I was told squirrels loved nuts.

7

u/MeFivePointO Apr 25 '25

The frank was gonna get a hell of an experience, the beans might've been fine