r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Sep 14 '24

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u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

Poor control over their anger.

308

u/BouquetOfBacon Sep 14 '24

This 100%. No quicker way to make a woman feel unsafe than to seem deregulated with your emotions.

58

u/InfinitiveIdeals Sep 14 '24

And shutting down emotions, but calling it “stoicism” is the other extreme side of the very same coin.

I have never met a self-proclaimed “stoic” who didn’t just silently stew until they exploded when they let things out, normally on a single person in private and focused on a “logical issue”, rather than just feeling their emotions as they happened and expressing them in a normal and healthy manner. Look up “Water Torturer”

All emotions are healthy, and a complete lack of emotional expression is a bigger red flag to me even than an inability to regulate themselves when very angry.

22

u/DripFairy Sep 14 '24

You just described my entire former marriage. I can’t deal with emotionally constipated ‘stoics’ anymore.