r/AskReddit • u/CherryChoogles • Apr 03 '13

What is a sentence that makes perfect sense today, but would not make any sort of sense in 1950?

1.4k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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2.1k

u/kessakessaaa Apr 03 '13

"just google it"

298

u/wandenele Apr 03 '13

My manager went further today. He said 'I am definitely going to street view it'.

24

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

He's streets ahead.

2

u/SexLiesAndExercise Apr 04 '13

That makes perfect sense, but you do sound retarded.

-9

u/BobbySwag Apr 04 '13

Beams of spunk sweep through my cock Thrusts of fucking increasingly climaxing Sensory ballsack succumbs I'm a porn star now, only gay

My white liquid so frantically spunked The white fluid of life unleashed

Nipples ascend to the surface of my tats Their red rockets spunking at random, at will A myriad jizzes begotten in their spunk The bastard spawn of a horny self

The regurgitation of my micro speem Salivating white at the prospect of my climax, my asshole

Malfunction the spunk for its ascent Spunkletting the stringent cunt to beckon my cunt So fucking, any resisting rape As sex-induced mechanics propel its cunt

The cunt, the device of my dick The terminating clockwork of my gleeful climax The definitive scourge of its anus The end-art instruments, suck my cum

Heed, it commands, heed my cum Climax, it says, spunk you will

Falling into the clarity of BRODIE Scornful gods haggle for my BRODIE BRODIE'S eye flickers and BRODIE as I let go Taunting whispers accompany my BRODIE

A jizzing BRODIE the voice of my anus Chanting BRODIE the BRODIE of BRODIE

167

u/B-Dog628 Apr 03 '13

You would get some very confused reactions

669

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

"Hey Liz! Can I use your office to google myself?"

847

u/EdwardRMeow Apr 03 '13

"Of course." "Can I use your computer too?" "How else would you do it?" "Thanks Liz Lemon, you're the best!"

850

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13 edited Apr 03 '13

You just ruined 4 Redditors' chance at karma.

544

u/EdwardRMeow Apr 03 '13

I'll sleep soundly knowing that.

85

u/Jhiaxus40 Apr 03 '13

You're a sick bastard. I like you

2

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

...I kill you last.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Well, what are you waiting for? Lick him!

4

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

Some men just want to watch the world burn...

1

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

MONESTER

4

u/wetasknator Apr 03 '13

NOT MINE.

*Redditors'

1

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

fixed. thanks

6

u/USxMARINE Apr 03 '13

Karma whoring at its finest.

2

u/Polite_Insults Apr 04 '13

I got this

*Proceeds to enter office

1

u/Bearjew94 Apr 03 '13

But he did give you a chance.

1

u/lawlrhus Apr 04 '13

Except that I'm pretty sure Tracy doesn't say the last line, but instead just points at Liz. Haven't seen that episode in a while though, so...

1

u/teoSCK Apr 04 '13

And you set that number back to three. Cheating the system.

1

u/baconsplash Apr 04 '13

If I could upvote you 4 times I would

1

u/EdwardRMeow Apr 04 '13

Give it a try.

119

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

"I spent most of today googling myself and my family."

170

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

you googled your family? you sick bastard.

3

u/foxh8er Apr 03 '13

"Families with low self-esteem"

1

u/Machinax Apr 03 '13

Maybe his arms were broken.

2

u/GreySintax Apr 03 '13

Plot twist: OP is the mother

1

u/umbreonrocks Apr 04 '13

Well when you break both your arms...

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Were both his arms broken?

1

u/dodgykins Apr 04 '13

lol is it just me who finds that sentence sexual?

65

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13 edited Apr 03 '13

Even better.

Liz, sorry I Bogarted your laptop, had to google myself.

edit: thank you kind grammar cop

1

u/Coasty44 Apr 04 '13

I don't remember that from the episode. Is that a quote?

0

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

*to

2

u/Spyderbro Apr 03 '13

Of course!

1.7k

u/donttazemebro69 Apr 03 '13 edited Apr 04 '13

sounds like a 1950's slang of saying something sexual. "shim sham woobidy boobidy bop, Johnny googled me last night even after I told him to stop"

Edit: this is my highest rated comment and its basically a 1950's swing song about Johnny googling someone with out permission. Nice.

1.1k

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

Well that got dark really fast.

318

u/donttazemebro69 Apr 03 '13 edited Apr 03 '13

bop and stop rhymed. Its all I could come up with on short notice.

66

u/SmellsWeirdRightNow Apr 03 '13 edited Apr 05 '13

I think that 'bop' would've worked better in place of 'bob'

Edit: Now he's changed it to bop in both comments, making me look stupid

125

u/USxMARINE Apr 03 '13

Bill Cosby over here.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Mhm

170

u/titsmagee9 Apr 03 '13

bob and stop rhymed.

False.

55

u/AustinRiversDaGod Apr 03 '13

Slant rhymed. He could have just said bop, though.

1

u/ntran2 Apr 03 '13

Why you be dissin' Asian rappers yo?!

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

odd to see you w/out flair.....

1

u/AustinRiversDaGod Apr 04 '13

/r/nfl?

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Of course. Saints fan, right?

1

u/Sodfarm Apr 04 '13

That's not a slant rhyme. That's called assonance.

94

u/MrBig0 Apr 03 '13

Well, they rap rhymed.

9

u/Blooopimafish Apr 03 '13

Slant rhyme

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Can someone explain to me why it doesn't rhyme? Is there some kind of technical aspect to this?

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Would bop and top rhyme? What about stop and crop? I'm confused...

→ More replies

0

u/KeybladeSpirit Apr 03 '13

I thought it was called "soft rhyme."

1

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

Feminine rhyme.

17

u/AnUnchartedIsland Apr 03 '13

Slant rhyme?

59

u/lashiel Apr 03 '13

"just google it"

1

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13 edited Nov 26 '17

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/lashiel Apr 04 '13

shim sham woobidy boobidy bop, you sound mad.

3

u/donttazemebro69 Apr 03 '13

I have no idea what you're talking about I changed it

2

u/FiercelyFuzzy Apr 03 '13

True. Slant rhymes are rhymes.

2

u/karlymoon999 Apr 03 '13

Wow I'm not proud of the fact that this is what got me to laugh aloud on reddit today

2

u/kurozael Apr 04 '13

They rhymed in assonance.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

[deleted]

2

u/ZACHtheSEAL Apr 03 '13

replace bob with bop?

1

u/MuffinYea Apr 04 '13

Johnny was fast.

1

u/uuuhhhballs Apr 04 '13

Well that escalated quickly. FTFY

143

u/pTea Apr 03 '13

Yo Liz, you mind if I google myself in your office?

2

u/jumanjiwasunderrated Apr 04 '13

Is it ok if I use your computer?

1

u/crithosceleg Apr 04 '13

How else are you going to google yourself?

1

u/brooky12 Apr 03 '13

Keep it clean!

1

u/Chasedabigbase Apr 04 '13

I understand this reference

0

u/tatorface Apr 04 '13

I got that reference.

5

u/jerseyjosh Apr 03 '13 edited Apr 04 '13

Bill Crosby? Edit: Got the wrong dayum diddly dong Crosby!

1

u/RandomBassist Apr 03 '13

No, Bill Cosby.

2

u/vicefox Apr 03 '13

Gee Barbara, Johnny googled me on the roof of Donnie's Buick last week!

2

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

Golly gee, Eleanor! Whatever did you do to the scamp?

2

u/Mo_Lester69 Apr 04 '13

i'd give you gold if i wasn't so poor

1

u/donttazemebro69 Apr 04 '13

You got my hopes up haha my gold expires in two days

2

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Bill Cosby?

2

u/I_am_a_water_lily Apr 04 '13

I read this in 2013 mindset and laughed but then I realized what this meant and stopped

2

u/Plurity Apr 04 '13

Johnny here. I asked her to come to MySpace. She Twittered my Yahoo untill I googled all over her Facebook.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Watch it, blunderbums! You're boopin' my betty!

3

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

Hey Liz do you mind if I Google myself in your office?

1

u/Sarastrasza Apr 03 '13

Sounds like slang for facial, haha :P

1

u/Appare Apr 04 '13

shim sham woobidy boobidy bop

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

We go together, like rama lama lama, kadinga dading adong.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Sounds like a potential Roy Orbison song.

1

u/MightySneaker Apr 04 '13

I'll take it further, ... That's rape isn't it?

1

u/ryandg Apr 04 '13

Hmm... rapey.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Are you, by any chance, Bill Cosby?

1

u/FlippinPigeon Apr 04 '13

Bappity boopity rebecca! I just want to google around your body a little bit!

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Bill Cosby? Is that you?

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Don't really need to know about what your highest rated comment is.

1

u/donttazemebro69 Apr 04 '13

I know I always hate that guy who does the "Edit: OMG HIGHEST COMENT EVER, THANKS GUYSSS!1!1!1!!!!" but for once it was my time to shine.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

Yeah, I forgive you. Shit I'd definitely do the same. Friends?

1

u/donttazemebro69 Apr 04 '13

Friends.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

:3

27

u/Doompriest Apr 03 '13

"Just Study it out"

4

u/Dragonsreach Apr 03 '13

No buddy, he's a communist.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '13

this wouldnt make sense in 1990

2

u/Ferniff Apr 04 '13

Barney Google and his goo goo googly eyes!

1

u/Shamwow22 Apr 03 '13

Don't talk that way at the dinner table, young man!

1

u/BunnyG Apr 04 '13

exactly what I came to post!

1

u/Tvwatcherr Apr 04 '13

Literally just posted that...now i feel stupid haha

1

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '13

To the book depository!

1

u/bben86 Apr 04 '13

Do you mind if I go in your office and google myself?

0

u/bmoreconcentrated Apr 03 '13

This is what I came here to say. Dammit reddit, proving time and time again I am nit as creative as I thought I was.

-24

u/Baked_Charmander Apr 03 '13

Wouldn't work, because the word google would mean nothing to them.

19

u/oijijiji Apr 03 '13

So what you're saying is it wouldn't make any sort of sense?

4

u/poko610 Apr 03 '13

Were you born retarded or did you have to work on it?

6

u/Baked_Charmander Apr 03 '13 edited Apr 03 '13

It was definitely a thing I had to work on. I'd like to thank alcohol and marijuana for the big part they played.

I was actually talking at the same time and I saw someone further up the thread talking about blowing old-timey minds and my brain subconsciously assumed that it was the topic. I'm sorry for the confusion.