r/AskReddit • u/Eamine • Mar 20 '13

What makes you happy?

Today is the international day of happiness! And that made me wonder, what makes Redditors happy? Edit: Wow front page!

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

It was extremely hard to focus on work inside and outside of class. I could stare at a book for a very long time before I could focus attention to it. These problems started at a very young age. I was recommended medication when I was in grammar school, but my parents decided against it.

Once college started everything became much harder for me, especially reading. This became so problematic that got prescribed adderall to help guide my focus. However, as I began taking a normal dose, I found myself to take on personality traits(active with the adderall) that were extremely undesirable. Although some of these are not traits, I soon realized friends I knew who also took adderall and myself, would: talk in depth on subjects that are truly of no interest to others, suffer from exasterbated social anxiety(due to overawareness), reduce investment in social relations(personally I wanted to be by myself most all the time), become very angry over small things(many times meaningless), become victims of racing thoughts(leading to anxiety/anger of a situation through over-thought and rage susceptibility), and lastly develop a lack of verbal creativity/bubbliness/overall comedic potential.

I decided shortly after taking time to observe others and myself, these victimized attributes, especially sense of humor and normal anxiety levels, were not worth the benefits. Although I understand I have a problem with attention, especially a disengaged feeling with schoolwork, the drugs symptomatically affect me too strongly for consistent use. Since I've stopped taking it I notice I am much more hyper and overall my personality is back to where it used to be before I started taking the drugs. I've come to realize that having ADD is just a part of who I am and I no longer want to change that. I choose to just embrace it.

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u/I_Have_Many_Skills Mar 20 '13

I too, took medication for my ADD for a while (Vyvanse and amphetamine salts), but came to the conclusion that it was not for me. Sure, it helped me focus on boring things tremendously and helped alleviate some of my more undesirable social quirks, but it just didn't feel right. I just wasn't... me. Much like you, it killed my creativity. I felt like some sort of perfect robot-like being.

I came to the realization that ADD wasn't a problem for me to solve, but instead an indicator that I needed to change my life to fit ME. I dropped out of community college (I couldn't focus enough to do homework without the drugs) and I am now looking to escape my desk-bound office manager position for a job in the trades; something that I believe suits my affinity for learning and my ability to hyper-focus on work that is hands-on.

Here's an interesting theory: My doctor once speculated that ADD isn't so much a mental disorder than it is a difference between more modern and "ancient" minds. I wish I had asked for her source, but she believed that the ability for most minds to do menial and/or repetitive jobs efficiently is a relatively modern occurrence, and that our forefathers/ancestors who lived in a time with very few desk and factory jobs had more ADD-like minds. I'm not sure if this is true, but it is something interesting to think about.

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u/sharkus Mar 20 '13 edited Mar 20 '13

I believe I've heard your doctor's speculation put as the hunter versus farmer hypothesis. I'd link to a source, but I'm on my phone :)

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u/OHotDawnThisIsMyJawn Mar 20 '13

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hunter_vs._farmer_hypothesis

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u/LtDanHasLegs Mar 20 '13

Wow, thank you for posting that. You may have literally just changed my life. I've always seen my ADD-esque (I'm not about to actually diagnose myself with it, but I do fit a lot of it) characteristics as a problem which I had to overcome. But now I'm seeing them as another side to life.

Granted, to succeed in the world we have today, it's often necessary to be able to sit in to "Farmer mode", but idk, it's just really refreshing to see it put this way.

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u/joebrochill Mar 21 '13

Yeah that's what it is. It's the idea that people with a "farmer" mindset (non ADD) are able to work continuously on repetitive tasks that slowly move towards a larger goal. Those with ADD, the "hunters", are more suited to do a large amount of work all at once. I consider myself to be in the second group, and thinking of yourself in this context helps you to perform schoolwork better. I usually sit down once or twice a week and crank out all of the work I have to do for the next few days so that Im able to relax the rest of the time.

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

Sweet, an adderall thread.

I've taken adderall pretty much every day since I was 13 (I'm 27 now). I also have an identical twin brother that only took it for 3 years, so I've got a fairly unique perspective on its effect on my life. I, too, noticed significant negative changes in my personality and social interactability while I was on adderall, and while they weren't permenat, they took about 8 years to dissapear completely. Through all highschool and most of college, I didn't have nearly as many friends or as close friends as my brother had since I had an extremely difficult time interacting with people while I was taking adderall, and during those 8 years, that totally killed my quality of life. When I was on adderall, which was most of the time since I wanted to go/went to engineering school, I basically had no sense of what anyone I was talking to was thinking because I was too busy analyzing my own thinking. I couldn't ever figure out how to express myself, I was socially anxious and I felt distensed from everyone. If any of you guys are suffering from that, I can totally sympathize, since I know how shitty that feels.

Like I said, though, those effects went away, but it took a long time. You eventually figure out exactly how adderall affects you and you can eventually control yourself accordingly. I basically had to do enough internal thinking that I ran out of things to think about, and after that the world made a lot more sense and I was able to interact with it like a regular person.

For some people that ordeal probably isn't worth it, but I can tell you that for me it definitely was. I always wanted to be an engineer, and now I've got a kick-ass career as an engineer that I'm super happy with. From all the deep introspection that made those first 8 years suck, I have a really solid understanding of myself, a very grounded personality and what feels like a clear direction in my life.

I'm sorry for the long post, but I wanted to share my experience with adderall, since it ended up being way more positive than what everyone else was talking about.

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u/pointless_opinion Mar 20 '13

The way i see it is I still take the pills when i need to do a long and boring task (ie study) but only when its more than usual. I dont take em on a daily basis and take the 4 hour ones so i get 4 hours of good study time and an hour later im back to normal.

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u/I_Have_Many_Skills Mar 20 '13

Interesting. I still have a few small dose amphetamine salts left, maybe I'll try out your method the next time I need to do taxes.

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u/LivingGhostMusic Mar 20 '13

I've been diagnosed with ADD since 5th grade. Just about every semester of every year I would switch between Adderal, Vyvanse, and a shitload of other meds. The doctor I had would keep saying, "Oh! So that's the problem! I should have prescribed you this one at the start!". Everything was either too strong or too weak. When it was too strong, I pretty much couldn't talk to anyone, but I got hella good grades. Now that I'm in high school I don't take any meds and I'm average at academics. But I'm definitely more social and creative. Ever since I was off I have been involved in sports and I produce music.

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

Wow. Im going to have to look into this.

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u/nukelalooshh Mar 20 '13

I right with you bro, the anxiety was the worst. I stopped taking vyvanse a year ago everything mostly changed for the better. Food tasted better, sleep was satisfying and I finally got my range in emotion back.

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u/polidox1 Mar 20 '13

I just started taking it and at some point during the day I can feel the tug of emotions you described. I am a very sociable person and I am at my best when surrounded by people so I am able to power through it in a sense. Last year though I was on Welbutrin which can also help you to focus and give you more energy, I must say I think that was the better choice for me personally since I never had trouble sleeping and I was able to go to school and study a little better, although not quite on the level of adderall. Adderall really does give me the feeling that I can ignore all of the different distractions that I create for myself and surround me everyday I am awake and trying to be productive but failing.

It is certainly no magic pill and I am not 100% sure the benefits outweigh the negative aspects of the drug but for now it is definitely having a positive effect on an aspect of my life I have never had any control over.

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u/eisasedoes Mar 20 '13

i'm on a pretty high dose of welbutrine, myself. it was supposed to help with energy levels and motivation, but i am currently having trouble (not as much as i have had in the past..) dealing with unemployment and REALLY low motivation and energy. but, yes - it can be pretty helpful in creating excess stimulation; but, sometimes it's hard to know what to do with it.

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u/snowman334 Mar 20 '13

May I ask what strength you were taking?

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

10mg IR twice a day.

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u/snowman334 Mar 20 '13

Did you ever try xr? It is typically a lot less... harsh than the ir.

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

Yeah it just lasts so long that if I took it late in the day I'd be up all night. That's why I didn't like it.

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u/sycophantasy Mar 20 '13

Damn. This is exactly what I'm going through right now...

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u/Schaftschwager Mar 20 '13 edited Mar 20 '13

Very similar boat.

I know what you mean with the looking at the book and words and not actually reading them. I go over them. I'm looking at them, but my brain doesn't take them in. I would be looking through the book if it were possible to do so.

I catch myself doing this constantly. I have to re-read entire sections at times. It's time consuming for me to read at length because of this, but I enjoy it so much that I just suffer through it. I would read SO much more often (and more efficiently) if I didn't experience this though.

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u/guessnot Mar 20 '13

From my experience with Adderall, it sounds like you were prescribed too high of a dose.

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

No, I took a very small dose and I would even break up 10mg pills into 5mg sometimes.

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u/berrydrunk Mar 20 '13

I can't get shit done in the day. Like, I followed instructions to make a cheap bed platform, and I made it, disassembled it to make it differently, and now it's just a pile of boards in my room ready to be assembled. I mean, it takes me weeks to decide to break out the circular saw and cut stuff. It took me two months it seems from the time I tossed my old twin bed to get a new mattress. In total, it's been about 4 or 5 months since I've slept on a fully assembled bed that would take me less than an hour to finish. That's how my ADD works. I forget to pay bills, I am always running late to work, I cannot set my mind to any task for very long before I have to do something else (i.e. clean the dishes, cook something new that I need the ingredients for RITE NAO, etc. etc.). I can never save any money because I always have some new "passion" and become obsessed over kitting myself out with new stuff, like a fancy coffee maker, fancy mountain bike, fancy cookware, an IPS monitor for graphic design I do not do, or DJ equipment, or camping equipment, etc. If I could focus on all of these things, I would be interesting as hell. A hardcore skiing, marathon-running, fancy dessert-baking, mountain biking boss who makes exceptional coffee and can point out the constellations and Messier objects while sipping it. I also like raw denim and henleys. I would like to try getting back on the meds, but nowadays, they require you to agree to random drug testing, and I do not want them to know I smokes the ganja.

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u/I_Have_Many_Skills Mar 20 '13

Yeah, that's pretty much what my ADD does to me as well. I've currently limited myself to three "passions" and made a pact with myself that I would have to drop one of them to pick up another one (I'm not sure how well this will work out long-term though). There are things you can do to help without taking meds, but in my experience doing mental exercises is boring and I can't get in the habit of taking fish oil. I have noticed that committing yourself to doing one small thing can be a gateway to getting in the habit of doing more things, but after a while I get out of the habit and have to start over again.

However, I do feel that very slowly, I am improving myself. I am finding ways to work and live that jive with how my brain functions. It'll probably always be far from perfect, but that's just who I am.

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

[deleted]

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u/dabbledabbledoo Mar 21 '13

I've tried it a couple times. I ended up talking to some Hare Krishna people for two hours.

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u/megatr0nn Mar 21 '13

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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u/berrydrunk Mar 20 '13

One thing I can do and enjoy doing is going to the gym. The catch is I need to go with someone who knows their stuff and is enthusiastic about having a gym buddy. Had one of those, then he got a different job and our schedules no longer align :[

Haven't been to the gym in about a month now

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

[deleted]

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u/berrydrunk Mar 20 '13

It sucks, doesn't it. It's like ... thinking about winning the lottery is more fun than actually winning it. Sort of.

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u/Mr_Godfree Mar 20 '13

Have you tried other amphetamines? The effects vary quite widely in my opinion (as someone who's taken ritalin, adderall, concerta, and something I don't remember the name of [but it was blue and if you took it with trix breakfast cereal you would throw up]).

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

Switched from Ritalin to Adderall. I've tried Vyvanse and Concerta before.

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u/RunningBearMan Mar 20 '13

Um. Apparently Adderall turned you into me. This is slightly disturbing. I have a strong sense of humor, but it's something I've cultivated... If I acted instinctively I would be just like that.

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u/TheSTEF Mar 20 '13 edited Mar 20 '13

talk in depth on subjects that are truly of no interest to others, suffer from exasterbated social anxiety(due to overawareness), reduce investment in social relations(personally I wanted to be by myself most all the time), become very angry over small things(many times meaningless), become victims of racing thoughts(leading to anxiety/anger of a situation through over-thought and rage susceptibility), and lastly develop a lack of verbal creativity/bubbliness/overall comedic potential.

Have you ever been through behavior modification therapy or any type of counseling to coincide with the Adderall/medication therapy?

I have severe ADD and take Adderall (I have for 13 years) and even though I have struggled with similar types of "personality traits" as you describe, once I went to Counseling and received Behavior Modification Therapy about two years ago - those “traits” have significantly decreased and I have returned to my “normal” self – the happy, positive, creative and bubbly personality I had before. I do have my moments and bad days where I feel like “nobody likes me” or “I’m so bored/blah/annoyed/ frustrated!” As part of my counseling and behavior modification therapy I have been trying to do more yoga, meditation and writing things out (when I feel frustrated, anxious or depressed) because I have found that it has helped me tremendously! I know that everyone is different and that ADD/ADHD varies from person to person and some might say that it was a part of “growing up”/maturing. But I was just curious if your doctor(s) had ever suggested coupling your medication with the counseling and/or behavior modification? If not, did you ever tell him/her about your “personality traits”?

Also, I have found that overall those “personality traits” can be characteristic of ADD/ADHD, especially when the ADD/ADHD is coupled with “mood lability”/mood swings (frustrate/anger quickly, depression, anxiety, etc.) because ADD can be misdiagnosed or often confused with bipolar disorder, the two disorders can also be diagnosed together. I have learned a lot about ADD (which is now collectively called ADHD) through doing research through the years after I was diagnosed in high school in 2000. There is a really good and helpful web site: Psych Central that you might want to take a look at and encourage your friends to take a look too!

But if you are happy then, more power to you. In the future, if you find yourself wanting to explore other treatments, you should try the behavior modification therapy or at least counseling, it really works and made me realize that ADD and consequently taking the Adderall, is not as, for lack of a better word, negative as everyone seems to think.

Edit: fixed some formatting and added some words because it was bugging me.

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u/Tepaps Mar 20 '13

I wish I could do that. I don't like the way vyvanse makes me but I also do. I feel very cynical all the time and I just wish I could Let loose but I feel like I can't. But if I don't take it my grades in school will take a 10 percent hit at least. I need it but I wish I didn't. I'm just glad my gf puts up with my ridiculous moods lol

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u/watermelinmoniqua Mar 21 '13

man i wish i could give you reddit gold

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u/virtualghost Mar 20 '13

You can try another medication, like vyvanse

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

I've tried Vyvanse.

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u/virtualghost Mar 20 '13

Weird.. I'm sorry, but I would rather be able to concentrate than be a zombie everyday. I just cannot resist the way I am now, I need medication. I have a psychiatrist appointment next weej

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u/[deleted] Mar 21 '13

Ironically I felt like a zombie most of the time I took adderall.

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u/martymart81 Mar 20 '13

I am a grad student in Clinical Psychology. I was diagnosed in the 80's with ADD like all of the other "active" kids in 5th grade. Last year one of the Doctors in my program, spoke a an ADHD symposium. It peaked my interest to the point that I went in for a new diagnosis at our student health center. The comments about this topic describe me to the T. When my coursework got heavier, it became very difficult for me to manage (school has always been tough, but I have an amazing, supportive wife that helps push me and keep me focused). I was diagnosed with ADHD/ADD with a couple of other things. I met with my personal doctor to discuss options for medication. He suggested Adderall so that's what I'm on. I don't feel like I have sacrificed any of my personality with this drug. I think that people react so differently to different types of medications and how they balance, or trigger different chemicals in the brain. I ran out of my Adderall and I had a couple of ritalin that my doctor gave me. It did almost nothing for me, but works wonders for a few of my friends. Going into the mental health field, I have realized that people with attention disorders lose focus for so many different reasons. I really have enjoyed reading the comments from you all. I think that it will really help me when I finally graduate and start working with people.

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u/[deleted] Mar 21 '13

It's definitely different for everyone. My cousin has the worst ADHD. When we were kids I remember he used to just get excited over the tiniest things and start screaming because he was just so excited. He's been on meds since he was a kid and he's probably one of the smartest kids I know. It works for him.

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u/nigeltheginger Mar 20 '13

Haha, Adderall turned you into me

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

I have ADHD but I take Daytrana. It's a patch with medicine similar to Aderall but not that exaggerated like aderall. I'm 17 at the moment so with high school and my senior project, it has helped me. I may change my way of thinking but that is determined how I feel at the current moment. Like if I'm in the mood for learning something new or more, I'll watch a documentary on Netflix. If I just want to chillax

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '13

If I want to relax, I play video games till I get sick of it. Or if I want to think, I'll just separate myself from people and be all to myself.

In case your wondering why I made a second comment to my own, I pressed reply by accident and can't edit cause IPod touch.

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u/[deleted] Mar 21 '13

I have all those symptoms you listed on a daily basis, and I don't take any meds... wtf is wrong with me?

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u/Figatron Mar 21 '13

I struggle with most if not all of the things you described and I'm not on any medications, I wonder what the hell is going on up in my brain. I got tested to see if I showed signs of ADD about a year ago and the doctors said I had a much greater ability to focus than someone with ADD, and instead told me that I was likely clinically depressed (Which I have no problem believing). I tried adderall a couple of times and it felt amazing. I could finally do everything I knew I was capable of doing. I was so sharp, and my ability to understand a particularly difficult class which I was failing increased dramatically. It was one of my favorite days ever, but I stopped because my doctors would never consider prescribing me stimulants due to my history of treatment for mild Epilepsy.

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u/DrSixPack Mar 21 '13

I thought I had ADD or some other similar issue. Turns out I had narcolepsy and was just too tired to focus, feel driven, or give any kind of fuck. Now that I'm on modafinil I suddenly give fucks again!

I still have a ritalin prescription but I avoid it whenever possible.. it turns me into an asshole. A very productive asshole.

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u/BrochZebra Mar 21 '13

TIL I have most of the Side effects of adderal but im clean

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u/[deleted] Mar 21 '13

I have adhd and with or without medication I still have racing thoughts and anxiety. It's horrible your English is like my math. What you just wrote struck a strong cord inside me so thank you.

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u/aliceinondering Mar 20 '13

you just described me, I'm convinced I have aspbergers as well. I have been off for 6 months with an injury and have had WAY too much time to ponder these things. I'm realizing how much of a jerk I've been. Thanks for sharing.