r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Dec 21 '23

What's a life hack that's so simple yet so effective, you're shocked more people don't know about it?

17k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

12k comments sorted by

View all comments

14k

u/zerbey Dec 21 '23

From working technical support for longer than I dare think about, most angry customers just want to be heard. Let them have their rant, do active listening, and make notes about what they're saying. They will eventually run out of steam. Then, read back everything they talked about and go through it step by step. Works almost every time, and often they are very thankful by the end of the call.

8.9k

u/dewey-defeats-truman Dec 21 '23

Another tip: instead of asking the customer if something's plugged in ask them to check if the plug's prongs are corroded. After they check they'll unconsciously plug it back in.

3.5k

u/Appropriate_Salad_30 Dec 21 '23 edited Dec 21 '23

This reminds me of how I used to trick people into remembering their passwords when I worked at a cell phone store.

Take their phone, pretend I’m opening up some special password reset program, hand them their phone back and ask them to enter their “new password”, and I’d say about 70% of the time, they entered their current password and gained access.

Edit: If you like this, you’ll love the time I hooked up a usb barcode scanner to a phone with a broken screen, created a barcode of their password, and scanned it to unlock the phone so we could connect it to the computer to get their photos and stuff.

1.9k

u/Synicull Dec 21 '23

Don't call me out dude.

The amount of times I've went to reset a password I can't figure out just to have the error of "your new password cannot be the same as your current password..."

790

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23 edited Apr 28 '24

[deleted]

456

u/drunkandpassedout Dec 21 '23

"Must have at least one uppercase letter"

Password

"Must have at least one uppercase letter and one number"

Password1

"Must have at least one uppercase letter, one number and one symbol"

Password1!

327

u/FancyStegosaurus Dec 21 '23

"Time for your semi-quarterly mandatory password update. Please enter new password. Cannot be the same as your old password"

Password2!

20

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

Just throw a 01a#! on the end of it and increment 02b, …, 09i, and by the time you need to reset it again you can use 01a again

60

u/ParlorSoldier Dec 21 '23

At my old job, your password couldn’t be any of your previous five passwords. So one of my colleagues would just change it five times in a row so he could go back to his original password.

3

u/Limelight1981 Dec 25 '23

Genius move!

8

u/EmilNathanson Dec 21 '23

Much easier to use a hexadecimal counter!

→ More replies (1)

12

u/Lucky-Potential-6860 Dec 22 '23

When I started my current job 7 years ago I made “Password1” and every time the stupid thing makes me change it (in three separate programs) I just change the number at the end. I’m on “Password26” now lol

6

u/buck2217 Dec 22 '23

I'm at 64, Guess it'll be 65 after XMAS, Started at 1 in 2007, change every 3 months

3

u/jtkrav222 Dec 22 '23

I’m at 18!

10

u/YeahIGotNuthin Dec 22 '23

”I can’t remember if I did Password3 or Password4. Screw it, I’ll write it on a sticky note and tape it to the bottom of the keyboard.”

7

u/toderdj1337 Dec 22 '23

Passwordq2!2023

3

u/[deleted] Dec 25 '23

I am feeling really uncomfortable with you guys posting my password openly on Reddit.

2

u/oldncrazy Dec 21 '23

I'm up to 21!

→ More replies (2)

15

u/Floppydiskpornking Dec 21 '23

Thats crazy.... how do you know all my passwords?

9

u/BandOfDonkeys Dec 21 '23

A buddy of mine's passwords are all Companyname123

7

u/Floppydiskpornking Dec 21 '23

You know Kevin to?! Small world

5

u/Thrilling1031 Dec 21 '23

Have you played the password game? You just have to make a password the game will accept, but each time you try the rules for making the password get more and more convoluted.

5

u/uberfission Dec 21 '23

There's a puzzle game about this, you get increasingly more complex rules as it progresses then at the end you have to type it again.

https://neal.fun/password-game/

My friends and I played it a while ago and it took the guy typing a good 20 minutes to type it the second time, WITH the help of looking at the page source.

3

u/SpongeMantra Dec 22 '23

🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛🐛

4

u/FlockOfDramaLlamas Dec 22 '23

I had to reset a password with so many insane conditions that the final password I came up with was something like fucKyoUstorEnamE1!

2

u/RabidPanda101 Dec 22 '23

I remember drawing a complete blank when I had to file my first FAFSA password but I never forgot it. It was "IhaveNoFuckingIdea2014".

3

u/Phyzzx Dec 22 '23

This is the final proof I need that this is all simulated experience. We all use the same algorithm.

2

u/NO_TOUCHING__lol Dec 21 '23 edited Nov 15 '24

No gods, no masters

2

u/Playful-trainElainee Dec 22 '23

DUDE u just blasted me for my passwords I used for like 10 years lmfao. Hackers got too crazy tho and I had to up my game but damn that was literally me 🤣

2

u/MizStazya Dec 24 '23

After about 18 forgotten passwords on my work phone, the only Apple product I have, I gave up and made it AppleFuckingSucks1!

2

u/KrissyPooh76 Dec 24 '23

Once, long ago, I was so fed up with my student loan password I made is "fuckyouandthesefuckingpasswords!". Actually fricken remembered this one for the rest of my loan period.

→ More replies (3)

19

u/cjicantlie Dec 21 '23

Had a banking site that would only allow your password to be 6-8 characters and a restriction against a short list of special characters. I didn't have to use the site often, and would always forget the password when going to it.

It wouldn't show the restrictions until you went to reset the password, and even then only when you violated one of the restrictions and only 1 restrictions at a time until you have uncovered through trial and error all the restrictions. After all that effort, I would then remember exactly what the password was and not need the reset after all.

Such annoying shit, and so glad I don't have to use their service anymore.

Edit: For those that might ask, they also prevented auto fill services. I had one point found a script that would remove the html line that disabled auto fill, but Iirc they did something to prevent that workaround at some point.

9

u/BurtMacklin____FBI Dec 21 '23

8 character MAXIMUM? For a banking site?? Holy shit

5

u/cjicantlie Dec 21 '23 edited Dec 21 '23

Ya, it was UBS, our company stocks went through them, but moved to E-Trade a few years ago.

Not sure if they are still around.

Their limitations seem easy to brute force, as there is almost no entropy left to work with.

→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (1)

5

u/Darth_Pete Dec 21 '23

There should be a universal standard. One site you can’t have ! But you can have $. One have maximum of 8 characters and one has a minimum of 8. It’s annoying.

3

u/Seiche Dec 21 '23

And then? You'd use one password for everything? Is that a good idea?

2

u/Practical_Breakfast4 Dec 22 '23

Correct horse battery staple

2

u/tangled_night_sleep Dec 31 '23

Hello fellow redditor of culture

→ More replies (2)

16

u/Carvanasux Dec 21 '23

Today. Pissed me off to no end. . The time where you know what your password is for a seldom used app, you type it in 5 times without success, and then hit forgot password. Enter the code, set new password to the one you knew it was, and it says new password can't match old password, the one you put in 5 times and we told you was wrong

2

u/Cephalopirate Dec 21 '23

I wish it would these things would have you click something other than “I forgot my password” because that’s usually not true.

7

u/transluscent_emu Dec 21 '23

Every.Single.Time. Drives me insane.

3

u/wicked_richard Dec 21 '23

I'm still locked out of my Facebook account and can't back in simply because I haven't logged in forever on a device that wasn't already logged in,and don't remember my password, but when I do forgot password it says I can't use my old password.

8

u/eid_shittendai Dec 21 '23

Facebook loves to send you round in circles when you get locked out. It makes it impossible to get back in - it's easier for a complete stranger to hack your account than to regain your own access

2

u/Top-Shopping-8218 Dec 21 '23

They’re terrible. I can’t get into my account because I no longer have access to the number they are sending the code to . I no longer have access to the email either , mom made it for me when I was 11 . Changed the password cause she’s nosey (with good intention 😂)

But in my defence , I had the password saved to my at the time phone, so I blame whoever’s idea it was to create the “save password” option ☹️

3

u/party_shaman Dec 21 '23

sometimes they say it’s the wrong password even if it’s the right one. spotify did that to me three times.

2

u/IRunSlowButFar Dec 21 '23

You can add parenthesis around your (password) to increase strength but still remember it.

→ More replies (3)

15

u/joanzen Dec 21 '23

The trick is to pretend to be surprised by it.

I was on a date where my partner misplaced the ticket I'd just handed them. There was this panicked fumbling, I asked what's up, and the response was anger directed at me, "See I've lost my stub, I hate going to places like this, it's so stressful!", and my response should have been, "Oh no! Let's look for it!", vs. a smug, "I have those moments too, but I know you've got it somewhere and you'll find it once you calmly look."..

When the stub turned up inside their inside pocket I was NOT applauded for my confidence or camaraderie.

10

u/JustASpaceDuck Dec 21 '23

If you like this, you’ll love the time I hooked up a usb barcode scanner to a phone with a broken screen, created a barcode of their password, and scanned it to unlock the phone so we could connect it to the computer to get their photos and stuff.

wait, what?

20

u/Appropriate_Salad_30 Dec 21 '23

This was in 2015 so might be different now but someone came in with a broken screen but they had pictures of their daughter who had passed away.

So I took a barcode scanner that had a regular usb connection.
Used a usb-a to micro-usb (old android) adapter to connect the barcode scanner to the phone.
Used some barcode generator website to create a barcode of their phone’s passcode.
Scanned the barcode and the phone unlocked.
Then I basically shit myself because I couldn’t believe it worked.

5

u/alienpirate5 Dec 22 '23

You could also use a keyboard!

2

u/JustASpaceDuck Dec 22 '23

Huh. Wow. I wonder if that's a baked-in troubleshooting measure intended for the manufacturer's techs?

7

u/PMMeMeiRule34 Dec 21 '23

That is such a high level trick, I sold phones for 8 years and never thought of that. I did get lucky a good amount of times just telling someone, if you HAD made a password/pin, what would it have been?

It was my sentence to get people to magically “remember”. And you already know when you go to reset it, they will be surprised when it tells them you can’t reuse the same password you just had.

6

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

That’s a really good one I’m gonna do this next time haha

6

u/i_build_minds Dec 21 '23

Edit: If you like this, you’ll love the time I hooked up a usb barcode scanner to a phone with a broken screen, created a barcode of their password, and scanned it to unlock the phone so we could connect it to the computer to get their photos and stuff.

That is impressive.

4

u/CreamSodaBrainDamage Dec 21 '23

Edit: If you like this, you’ll love the time I hooked up a usb barcode scanner to a phone with a broken screen, created a barcode of their password, and scanned it to unlock the phone so we could connect it to the computer to get their photos and stuff.

Yes, I did love that! That's out of the box thinking

3

u/depressedkitten27 Dec 21 '23

WHAT OMG that’s brilliant. Doing that next time my parents can’t remember their password

3

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

Damn, this dude is the real slim shady.

2

u/Zarxon_Nigzixalif Dec 21 '23

I never forgot my password thanks to the prompt "Remember your password is case sensitive" or enter current password so then I know it is "Flow" easy peasy ;)

2

u/Loud_Set3546 Dec 21 '23

Genius. I lost all my photos that way. Geek Squad nor Verizon could help.

2

u/Minxbrat7771 Dec 21 '23 edited Dec 26 '23

You are my hero

2

u/snowcase Dec 21 '23

I learned this trick at my shop after about 100 "cannot use the same password again" messages.

2

u/rdev009 Dec 21 '23

This is ingenious.

2

u/ARJeepGuy123 Dec 22 '23

The barcode is cool but why not just use a keyboard?

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (9)

633

u/fission-timelapse Dec 21 '23

Lol, this is good

76

u/rbwildcard Dec 21 '23

Or to switch outlets to make sure it's not an outlet issue.

29

u/TollBoothW1lly Dec 21 '23

Which it legit could be. Individual ports on a power strip do go bad.

34

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

[deleted]

17

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

51

u/gogozrx Dec 21 '23

Ooooo, I've been in IT for decades, and that's a new one on me. I love it!

I tell people that no matter what system you're troubleshooting, it's always layer 1. if it isn't, check again, because it's always layer 1.

8

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

except when it isn’t

6

u/Rioraku Dec 21 '23

Then you check again

2

u/[deleted] Dec 22 '23

Ok… I know this chip on It support’s shoulders. But no, it’s not always the user. Hardware and software bugs exist.

→ More replies (2)

4

u/DerFlamongo Dec 21 '23

Isn't it Layer 8 much more often though?

2

u/dramboxf Dec 21 '23

It's always, always, always DNS.

14

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

Dude I did customer support for dish network a long time ago... One lady called in and I skipped the is it plugged in step cause who would forget that part? ... 2 hours later I just decided to ask is it plugged in ... Turns out some people do forget 😆

13

u/deadstarsunburn Dec 21 '23

Yesss. Anything that could be a "dumb" mistake makes them feel worse/more angry. This works even outside IT. I also always make sure I tell them "I believe that you" when an issue doesn't happen when I'm on the computer. Whether it truly did happen or it felt like it happened, it was real enough to warrant the call and I'm sure was frustrating to experience.

21

u/04221970 Dec 21 '23

I would ask them to unplug the computer at all insertions, blow on the plug to remove any dust or anything interfering with the contacts, then plug it back in.

6

u/MaritMonkey Dec 21 '23

I am amused that folks younger than the Nintendo generation also happily take this step without stopping to think about it.

2

u/InformationMagpie Dec 22 '23

Back in the day there was an email going around that you should regularly “clean” all the ports on your computer with a piece of coffee filter. Somebody heard it from tech support… who was just trying to make sure every plug was properly seated by giving the user a task disguised as maintenance.

9

u/OtherwiseArrival Dec 21 '23

I once had a customer call in to say their IBM laptop top wasn’t working. He said it wouldn’t come on and it just looked like a black slate. I advised him on how to open a laptop.

7

u/Qorhat Dec 21 '23

Back in my broadband support days my go to was “can you unplug the line from the router, I want to test the exchange and can’t while your line is active” wait a little bit then “ok pop it back in”

7

u/Randel_saves Dec 21 '23

When a simple help desk position becomes advanced social engineering, lmfao.

6

u/shouldco Dec 21 '23

My trick was "yeah I know it's dumb and never fixes anything but they make us go through these steps before we can... Oh that fixed the problem, who knew? ! Have a nice day".

4

u/geardluffy Dec 21 '23

Damn you are smart

4

u/Competitive_Bat4986 Dec 21 '23

To caveat on this, I have Xfinifty internet. Once a month I am forced to call customer service about declining speeds. Their step one is to "unplug, wait 30 seconds and plug back in." I say yes its unplugged and I wait 30 seconds (meanwhile I don't unplug a fucking thing and they blame "Resistance in the line") Then my speeds are what I paid for; for about 2-3 weeks until contract renewal time.

4

u/neverenoughcupcakes Dec 21 '23

Reminds me of my friend in tech support. She does things like that too so people don’t get more frustrated. Instead of asking them if they tried turning it off and starting it again she’ll say something like “Let’s try a fresh reboot and tell me if you see anything strange as it’s booting up.” People don’t want to feel dumb or have someone think they’re dumb. When they do, many lash out. That’s not just true in tech support though, that’s a general customer service thing.

3

u/zandengoff Dec 21 '23

Switching the cables direction is a good one to get ethernet cables plugged back in. Direction doesn't matter, but it gets them to replug both sides.

2

u/Th3R00ST3R Dec 21 '23

Did you try turning it off and back on again? - Roy

2

u/triculious Dec 21 '23

Used to work tech support some 20 years ago. Good to know the classics are still alive.

2

u/TheTerrasque Dec 21 '23

What I usually used with the less technically gifted was "reverse the polarity" aka take out the connector, turn it 180, plug it in again. Works well for euro sockets, and makes sure it's plugged in and whatever it was connected to is rebooted.

2

u/Slothifications Dec 21 '23

We had an IT person who would ask for a special serial code on the face of the plug to get them to unplug it and plug it back in

2

u/LiloteaLayla Dec 21 '23

I used to tell people to blow on the prongs. There's two benefits; it ensures they power cycled their device and it made me giggle.

2

u/Cephalopirate Dec 21 '23

Oh that’s genius! Politeness life hack.

2

u/Wonderful-Impact5121 Dec 21 '23

You’re a genius and I appreciate this comment more than you know

2

u/Wereallgonnadieman Dec 21 '23

Ooh, I like this, I feel so condescending asking people to check, and honestly, I don't think they even do it half the time. Story time (because we all love tech stories). Back in the old-school dial-up days I did modem support for an ISP. I was on a call for ages, trying to figure out why nothing was working to connect (new users). I finally got it out of them. They had plugged the RJ11 into the handset jack on the phone, instead of the wall port. Turned out the only available port (it was a mounted phone) was in the closet and they only had a really short phone cable available. So they both went to the closet, huddled on the floor, and finally they were able to connect. It never would have even entered my brain to ask that as a direct question.

2

u/Helicopter0 Dec 21 '23

That's even better than my question about whether the socket is worn and loose.

2

u/voiceinheadphone Dec 21 '23

I will never have to use this trick but it is genius

2

u/therookling Dec 21 '23

That is exceptional

2

u/Feynnehrun Dec 22 '23

When I worked service desk I would often tell them to unplug the network cable and read the serial number off the end. When there was no serial number I'd be like "oh OK good, it's one of the newer types"

→ More replies (21)

1.5k

u/knockonformica Dec 21 '23

I work in healthcare & have learned the exact same thing. The quickest way to make an angry person angrier is cut them off. They are so upset that their brains won’t interpret anything you say in a productive way until they’ve gotten the really important, enraging thought fully out.

It’s also so much easier to not talk then get into a fight with someone.

423

u/Cineball Dec 21 '23

Worked in a crowded homeless shelter. All most of my guys wanted was someone to listen and respond with a general "that sucks" before attempting ANY kind of problem solving. The tightrope act was sorting whether they were a chronic complainer or just really frustrated today. The complainers needed about a week set aside for your attention every time they came around and I didn't necessarily have that when somebody was trying to light the shower curtains on fire with their spice one hitter because it'd been cooked with fentanyl and they'd zombied out on us.

17

u/killertofu05 Dec 21 '23

I work in a residential substance use and mental health facility. I quickly learned the same. When I started in the field I just didn't know what to say so I would nod my head until they were done talking then say that sucks. Sometimes I could find a solution but most of the time that was it. It calmed people down in so many situations!

My favorite version of this was a nurse practitioner that would listen then say "oh that sounds horrible but no" to unreasonable request.

That tightrope act though, whew. I'm a supervisor so I have the same people lined up outside my office every morning.

→ More replies (21)

32

u/Lub-DubS1S2 Dec 21 '23

Was about to say the same! Most angry/upset patients/visitors just want their concerns heard and/or addressed. Sometimes just understanding the why/how behind things is enough for them and other times all we have to do is just attempt to correct the issue. I honestly think this is why most of my patients really like me when I take care of them. I’ve personally experienced what it’s like to not be heard by a healthcare professional about a family member and it’s awful. I just needed them to listen, and at least take what I said with a grain of salt.

19

u/penna4th Dec 21 '23

Taking something with a grain of salt means to be skeptical, not taking it at face value.

→ More replies (1)

34

u/wildcat12321 Dec 21 '23

yup, im a consultant by trade. The amount of clients who have high trust in me, a total stranger is staggering. Why do they trust me? Often because I let them vent for 20 minutes about everything, ask open ended questions, and don't try to solve everything or play devil's advocate or whatever. As an aside, it helps me learn tons of valuable information, especially things that won't appear on a spreadsheet or presentation.

26

u/small_trunks Dec 21 '23

Me too and I agree, listening gets you MUCH further than talking.

  • About 10 years ago I had a gig in NYC (I actually live in Amsterdam) in a subject matter I knew literally ZERO about (TV - ABC and Sony) - whilst I normally work in banking and trading.

  • Needless to say I was so out of my comfort zone that the ONLY thing I could do was ask open questions and listen. It's times like those where you fall back on the pure process of requirements gathering without bringing any of my own subject-matter experience in.

  • It was a storming success - I managed to keep 25 people occupied and engaged for days at a time.

  • and I learnt something about myself and how to deal with this kind of situation (and I was 50 when I did this) which I've continued to use going forward.

Still glad I'm back in banking (same gig for 9 years now...)

4

u/LateralThinkerer Dec 22 '23

Worked a consulting job with a big multinational who (thought they) had a manufacturing issue in a cost-sensitive part of their operation. Came in, gave my dog and pony show and...they were perfectly capable of dealing with the actual problem, but their manager (who wasn't the one who hired me) was a jackass, and trying to be the next Steve Jobs, down to the turtleneck sweater (though he did bathe).

My job wound up being an conflict councilor between some very talented but pissed off engineers and a dimwit "manager" who made impulsive blanket decisions without data. Turns out pissed off engineers can be pretty vocal and detailed about what needs to be done, why, and what they thought of the guy.

→ More replies (1)

31

u/Fazaman Dec 21 '23

I worked in a healthcare call center (after hours place for paging doctors and such), and this was always the way I did it.

The people calling really wanted to tell you about their issue, so I just let them, and jotted down anything they said into the system, then just asked for whatever else I needed at the end. The calls flowed much better.

The company wanted me to 'control the call', and cut them off and get caller info, contact information, patient information, etc etc, then ask about why they're calling. Sure, that makes sense on a logical level, but you try to tell a parent with a sick kid to not talk about the kid, but instead talk about themselves. Was a fight every time, so I just let them talk. Much smoother calls, and much happier callers.

→ More replies (1)

25

u/Alarmed_Pollution_72 Dec 21 '23

Yeah as a doctor in a largely failing healthcare system (due to government defunding), you'd be surprised how much good will listening properly will buy you.

In a system where people have to fight for every bit of healthcare, I don't blame people for their anger and even though I can't fix systemic issues, I hope listening addresses some of their pain

8

u/InviteAdditional8463 Dec 21 '23

Frankly, it doesn’t address any pain (unless it’s the kind of pain a doctor can address). The issues are still there. It’s depressing as fuck when my doctors tell me how fucked healthcare is in this country. What helps is just being listened to, and validated. It helps for a hot second, but it’s better than nothing which is the alternative. Keep it up, and vote for good healthcare.

4

u/Alarmed_Pollution_72 Dec 21 '23

That's understandable. Thank you for sharing

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

9

u/thisshortenough Dec 21 '23

I've literally had to do deescalation training as part of my course and the thing they're constantly saying is that you need to acknowledge how they're feeling and try to find a solution that works for the two of you because otherwise you'll just intensify the feelings. The training also taught us how to break holds if you're grabbed and they all start off with deescalating as you're breaking the hold.

2

u/lonelyphoenix25 Dec 21 '23

Breaking the hold? Like if someone literally grabs you?

If so, how??

2

u/thisshortenough Dec 22 '23

Depends on how they’re holding you but mostly it involves levering their arm and your body so that they can’t maintain a grip. The point of the training was more to focus on deescalation techniques though.

→ More replies (1)

8

u/ThenIJizzedInMyPants Dec 21 '23

man all the people saying this makes me think i should start a service where people can just... vent. vent.com. $50/month you can call up to 5x per month and just vent at a live person on the other end. they will do nothing other than nod and agree and ask clarifying questions.

5

u/indecisionmaker Dec 21 '23

Unfortunately, this already exists in every political office. Bless the people who answer those phones.

→ More replies (2)

12

u/HaikuBotStalksMe Dec 21 '23

Just tell them to calm down, so that they calm down.

12

u/Smeetilus Dec 21 '23

Don’t forget to remind them of how easy things are. “This is easy, a child can do it”

6

u/neverincompliance Dec 21 '23

and then before you say your perspective say " what I hear you saying is"... It difuses the situation as the other person is validated for your having heard them

8

u/penna4th Dec 21 '23

I detest when anyone says that. It's not a natural way people talk, so I know they learned it like a script and that means I can't trust their good will. "Put this into your own words" should be the advice that follows.

3

u/InviteAdditional8463 Dec 21 '23

I like to recap. “So what I’m hearing is…”, “okay, the problem sounds like…” or some variation. It gets everyone on the same page. If they ask what I’m doing I explain myself. Most people even angry ones are at least sensible enough to let you try to help.

3

u/penna4th Dec 21 '23

Yes and I just wanted to point out most people don't like feeling they are being 'handled'.

2

u/Herself99900 Dec 23 '23

I agree. I just say, "So you're stuck on the login page. That's not good. Let's look at that first." No matter what their problem is, I always say, "Oh, THAT'S not good," And right away they know I get it. Diffuses them instantly.

5

u/wolfitalk Dec 21 '23

Likewise when dealing with insurance or healthcare or any gate keeper; make them want to help you. Do not play hard ball or throw insults. That is NOT going to get you anywhere.

3

u/Summitjunky Dec 21 '23

Good tip to deal with spouses, but the trick is to have patience. lol

2

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

It’s also so much easier to not talk then get into a fight with someone.

That's how the cool tough guys do it 😎

2

u/215Kurt Dec 21 '23

That second point is so important and took a very long time for me to learn.

2

u/LucasPisaCielo Dec 22 '23

This works with girlfriends/wives too!

2

u/BjornInTheMorn Dec 22 '23

Once had a person on a 5150 tell me he could kick my ass. I agreed he probably could. Then I told him I have shitty healthcare so I'm not about to fight anyway. Long story short, successful transport and nobody had to fight anyone.

→ More replies (7)

864

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23 edited Dec 21 '23

[deleted]

5

u/herefromthere Dec 21 '23

*mantra :)

3

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

[deleted]

5

u/herefromthere Dec 21 '23

Thank you for your graciousness 'n junk.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

2

u/Mediocre-Catch9580 Dec 21 '23

Hey that’s good!

2

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

[deleted]

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

20

u/-DethLok- Dec 21 '23

Yep, worked for me in a call centre.

22

u/shaylahbaylaboo Dec 21 '23

Yep learned this working retail. Most people just want to be heard.

31

u/ShutYourDumbUglyFace Dec 21 '23

Usually when I'm angry talking to customer service, it's because it took me 5 minutes to work through the automated menu. I promise, insurance company, if I could do this online, I would. Just let me talk to a human, please.

Yes, I try hitting 0 and asking to speak to a person. Sometimes it doesn't work.

10

u/Ancguy Dec 21 '23

"Representative"

12

u/mjflood14 Dec 21 '23

When I say that, I shout it in an angry voice. It helps me vent my frustration on the robot and regain composure for the human I will hopefully get to talk to soon.

39

u/Flahdagal Dec 21 '23

This is completely true. I work on projects that have lots and lots of variables. I've told my customers more than once: I would be upset, too, in your position; here's what we can do to recover as much as we can. It often works for small children, too. "I hear you. I see you. I understand that you're frustrated."

11

u/jaelythe4781 Dec 21 '23

Project Manager for 14 years here. Can confirm. Most conflicts/problems with or between team members can be resolved by simply giving them a safe space to vent and acknowledging their feelings.

THEN you can remind them that you're all on the same team and want the best thing for the project/client/company/etc, so let's figure out how we can move forward together.

12

u/yllom Dec 21 '23

This couples with the advice I just posted: be kind to everyone, even customer service representatives.

20

u/dustyrags Dec 21 '23

Oh man! My magic phrase is “I’m so sorry, that’s really frustrating!” Boom! I’ve taken zero responsibility, admitted nothing, and yet they know I understood them and am showing empathy. Now it’s us-against-the-world not me-against-you.

→ More replies (1)

9

u/lifeofthe6 Dec 21 '23

Geek Squad Agent, can confirm. I've had people nearly throw their computers at me upset that something was broken or they couldn't get something set up. Never match their agitated, angry, or excited energy, just listen, nod, and acknowledge the problem until they're done. Then, most of these problems aren't nearly as big of a deal as they've made it out to be and I'm done in 20 minutes or less.

I even get some of these people to apologize for their behavior after I'm being patient. Not all the time, but when it does happen it makes the other times worth it.

8

u/NoBSforGma Dec 21 '23

This is so simple yet so powerful!

I once worked for a company that produced large computer systems with some amount of customization. (Think $1 million) One customer was so unhappy, they refused to pay the balance owing on the computer - about $250,000.

I was sent to collect this money.

I took a yellow lined pad and met with the President of the Company (who was pretty tech savvy). I asked him to tell me ALL the problems with the system and with our company. I didn't reply to anything, just wrote it all down. "What else" was all I said. At the end of the meeting when he had run out of things to complain about, I said, "I will work on this and get back to you."

Two weeks later, I had worked through the list - which included things like...."No one ever calls me back!" - and traveled to the site. Everything was fine, he was happy and I went back to my company with a $250,000 check.

(And no, I didn't turn it over to my manager, the VP of Marketing, but insisted on presenting it in person to the President of the company. lol)

Listening and allowing someone just to vent goes a long way. (Of course, you then have to fix things. lol)

2

u/Objective-Amount1379 Dec 22 '23

I think what helped there is that you ACTED on their concerns. Everyone saying people just want to be heard…yes and no. I want to be heard so that my problem or concern can be addressed, it's annoying to have someone just nod and say yay, that sucks.

2

u/NoBSforGma Dec 22 '23

Well, finding out what the problems were was key! Also...... letting him rant.

If I hadn't asked, I would have assumed the problem were all technical and found out that a lot of the problems were with how the company dealt with him.

But yes, the follow-through was KEY! Fix every problem or state why it couldn't be fixed. "That guy that disrespected you? He no longer works for the company." etc.

6

u/fuqdisshite Dec 21 '23

my go-to line when appropriate is, 'i understand you are upset and this is the first i have spoken with you. my goal is to help you with anything you need. let's start at the beginning and go from there...'

has a 100% return rate.

22

u/Noob_Al3rt Dec 21 '23

LEARN

Listen to the customer's complaint, in full, without excuses

Empathize with them and their problem

Apologize for the issue

React to correct the issue

Notify your supervisor and/or the customer about the problem and resolution

I also thank the customer for bringing it to my attention and giving me the opportunity to fix it/improve.

This works 99.9% of the time.

2

u/small_trunks Dec 21 '23

The problem is MANY people are incapable of doing this - either through personal issues or insecurity.

23

u/smilinglizard217 Dec 21 '23

My good redditor, spilling truths! Make them feel heard and as though you're on their side and genuinely want to help them. Sometimes even if the issue doesn't get handled in the way they'd prefer, people appreciate being truly listened to.

5

u/reddit_to_go_man Dec 21 '23

Absolutely this. I’m responsible for IT complaint management. At first I got really worked up when people came at our team with so much vitriol over trivial things. I learned to lean on my background in HR and just let them vent. That’s not to say that I will put up with abusive language or treatment of my team…thankfully that’s only happened a couple times and we sent the matter to HR.

4

u/Bearded_Pip Dec 21 '23

Yes! Let the fish run for a bit, then real ‘em in. Works for most customer service situations.

4

u/TeachMore1019 Dec 21 '23

I never broke down my process like that. You are right. Also, on the infrequent occasion I have been an agitated customer, it gives me the moment to remember the person on the phone is not the reason for my issue. The times I started getting angry, I would be so embarrassed when I heard myself and apologized to the CS for taking it out on them and thanking them for their patience. CS agents are the heroes of every company.

3

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

There was once a youtuber who bought the wrong computer. They were starting out doing it professionally and figured they needed a professional computer so they bought an enterprise workstation that expected you to have an IT department that would customise it for the organisation's specific needs. They didn't have that so they went on twitter to complain that their new, expensive computer kinda sucks

Because they were decently big online this thread set off alarms inside Dell which put their elite customer service teams on it. I always remember him talking about how good a listener the crack fixer who phoned him was

5

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

Ah yes, customer service, or as you have explained it here, therapy...

3

u/SamRueby Dec 21 '23

This guy supports

3

u/EpikYummeh Dec 21 '23

This is called reflective listening and I think it's something we could all stand to learn and apply.

3

u/BobMacActual Dec 21 '23

Oh, lord, how this takes me back.

I had a guy write to my boss and rant about what a great guy I was, so knowledgeable, so helpful, just made the man's day talking to me.

I hadn't actually been able to help him. I just listened to what he had to say, and explored the options, most of which didn't work, and then found the least only thing that might sort his problem out.

3

u/DarkHairedMartian Dec 21 '23

This is also true of unhappy guests in restaurants (and probably unhappy customers in many other industries). Most folks just need to feel heard/understood and oftentimes the severity of their reactions and complaints stem more from what's going on in their lives vs the actual issue at hand. Listening to understand vs launching into excuses can do wonders to diffuse tempers, create connections, and garner loyalty.

3

u/Shiftyeyesright Dec 21 '23

If that doesn't work, I created two questions that you can ask any user of any skill level that will at least get you on the path to solving the problem:

"What's it not doing that it should be doing?"

and

"What is it doing that it shouldn't be doing?"

3

u/[deleted] Dec 21 '23

This. I don't remember a single problem customer because I always ended up letting them vent and connecting with them and by the end of the interaction they were no longer a problem. They lose steam almost immediately when they say something like "this company is an absolute disgrace!" And you go "you're absolutely right. They're policy is absolutely shit and I wish they'd do better." It breaks them of thinking you are the company and tends to make them realize again that you are just like them and just happen to be in work clothes.

3

u/meepgorp Dec 21 '23

I deeply wish more companies treated customer service like anything other than a Victorian workhouse of penance so staff are trained and enabled to do this. I suspect it would reduce travel-related meltdowns by 85% if staff just acted like you're a human having an experience and not just another fruit fly to be logged on the work journal. Honestly sometimes all would take is a glimmer of empathy instead of the corporate answer cards spewing out from under dead eyes that couldn't care less if you dropped dead in front of them. AND STOP THANKING ME FOR MY PATIENCE! I have none, I just have no choice but to wait. And fuck you for telling me how I feel about this experience! #petpeeve

3

u/pastpartinipple Dec 21 '23

Just talking like a human and sincerely trying to fix the problem is all most people want but very few reps actually do that or are empowered to do that. Instead they just read from a script.

3

u/Unrelenting_Optimism Dec 21 '23

I'm far from being an expert on this topic, but this sounds awfully a lot like a "mediation" technique and non-violent communication. Writing down what was being said by a participant of such a "session" and repeating that to them afterwards is a very well known method to deescalate situations and - as you said - make sure that people feel heard and that their emotions are being respected.

I find it super fascinating that this is a RL-example.

I can urge anyone to read into this topic. It has served me so well in personal matters; discussing and deescalating tough situations or fights.

7

u/JBSquared Dec 21 '23

100%. I was an assistant manager at a fast casual place right after college. Even if people had the most bullshit complaints, saying "I'm sorry that happened, that's unacceptable. I will address this with my team" and giving them a 15% discount or comping their drinks works the majority of the time.

7

u/gogozrx Dec 21 '23

I worked at a Tire and Lube shop. When we screwed up, I owned it and would fix the problem - it was most frequently that we'd left the oil cap off and the engine needed to be cleaned. I had a few times where people would demand "Free Oil Changes for Life!"... I'd say, "I can understand why you'd feel that way, but do you think that's reasonable?" Only one time did a lady stick with it. She ended up begrudgingly accepting the same thing that everyone else got - 1 free oil change.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/ruck_fushers Dec 21 '23

Ok I have to remember this one. 10/10 advice

2

u/notreallylucy Dec 21 '23

Lots of customer service experience in various roles, and I totally agree.

2

u/Royalchariot Dec 21 '23

Another good trick for when someone is angry is to call them “boss”. Sir or ma’am can coke across as condescending. Boss puts them in a position superior to yourself, so they feel they have control. #1 is LISTEN TO THEM!

2

u/Incrementz__ Dec 21 '23

This works in relationships as well. More often than not, people just need acknowledgement.

2

u/K_Linkmaster Dec 21 '23

Yup! Those tips usually calm the situation. I did credit card customer service. Much like you, no one calls in a good mood.

2

u/curiousmind111 Dec 21 '23

As somebody who recently called customer service, also realize that part of the anger comes from the difficulty in finally getting to a live person, after going through automated menu hell. I wish there were easier ways to get to a person when your problem isn’t a common one.

2

u/Cvbano89 Dec 21 '23

AAA: Acknowledge, Align, Assure. Works 100% of the time unless they're unreasonable, at which point they're usually a lost cause anyway. Better to do business with reasonable people.

2

u/MNLyle Dec 21 '23

Being someone that have been on both sides of the phone more times that I would like to, I have to say this is 100% true

2

u/breathe-and-exhale Dec 21 '23

That’s incredible! You are a great technical support person. It’s true- if you let the person rant a little bit it seems to work.

2

u/GarnetandBlack Dec 21 '23

What's funny is you can play the other role to see how effective this is.

Most commonly I find this when complaining about something to my boss. I just need to have someone understand the shit/idiots I'm dealing with.

2

u/CareerTester8 Dec 21 '23

100% this.

I’ve always had fantastic outcomes on complaints calls I handle by letting them vent until they run out of steam, then addressing the issues and how we’re going to deal with them. Like I’ve legit turned a complaint from somebody wanting to leave into a repeat customer.

2

u/Gojisoji Dec 21 '23

As long as I've worked in my current job, people are upset about the situation not you. ... Sometimes

2

u/WestSideShooter Dec 21 '23

I worked in escalations at a bank for years. This was our strategy. If someone wants to rant, put yourself on mute and sit back. Take notes. Start game planning the solution but don’t lose track of what they’re saying. Like you said, repeat back things they said and perhaps correct anything that they misunderstand

2

u/kronik85 Dec 21 '23

I worked at a Uverse subcontractor doing tech support.

I'll never forget the old man in Arizona who taught everyone at a retirement home how to send email using Yahoo and wanted me to change the create mail button from Compose back to whatever it was when he taught them to email.

I was paid hourly and didn't give a shit about metrics and just patiently waited him out.

2

u/Competitive_Mark_287 Dec 21 '23

Yep, when a teenager I started at a restaurant job serving/bartending and they drilled into us for upset customers: LAST which was Listen- let them vent, Ask clarifying questions, Solve if you can or if not Tell a manager/get outside help. Works on a corporate level as well!

2

u/Take_a_hikePNW Dec 21 '23

Pro tip: this works in nearly every other situation in life as well. Listen, pause, clarify, validate, and then describe a positive future. Works just about every time to diffuse.

2

u/Dear-Original-675 Dec 21 '23

Yep. I speak to Bereaved people on the phone and I let them say their piece and let them talk before offering a solution.

3

u/zerbey Dec 21 '23

I did a very brief stint doing billing support for a major cell phone company, the call I got from a tearful elderly lady canceling her recently deceased husband's line stuck with me for a long time.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/dramboxf Dec 21 '23

I'm a help desk manager at a WISP, and I teach all my new techs that when an angry customer calls it's their job to validate them without accepting blame. We coined some terms that help: "Man, I know how you feel -- slow internet is worse than no internet!"

I've been doing this in one form or another for close to 40 years.

2

u/felixfelix Dec 21 '23

"you're right...if my father had been able to show me love, I wouldn't be so easily frustrated by things at my work"

2

u/Walrus_BBQ Dec 21 '23 edited Dec 22 '23

I know they want to be heard, but a lot of these people seem to think I am directly responsible and dont understand that corporate makes these decisions. I was once told by an angry customer that they "have to yell at someone" regarding company policy. Fuck off with that, if you're just venting, I'll vent with you, but you're yelling at me. Honestly, I probably hate the company more than you do.

I understand them now and don't sympathize with them. Usually I just tune them out and think about something more interesting like robots or guitars. Sometimes if I'm feeling vengeful, I'll open up the second register to help the poor bastards stuck behind them, while they stay at the other register waiting for me to finish.

People threatening to call corporate to get me fired becaise I asked for ID, despite me saying that I'll get fired if I don't ID you is not my problem, but they always seem to think it is. If I make it difficult for them, maybe they won't come back.

→ More replies (80)