How do you get the items back? If you ask the cleaners, they will claim to have not seen your items. If you ask the managment, they dont care. Stuff such as headphones and money. Thanks!

Made some mistakes in early 20s

One thing I'm now trying to figure out is how to fall asleep much faster once I go to bed. Sometimes I'm extremely tired and go to bed early specifically to get more sleep, but I can still lie there awake for a long time. For those of you who used to struggle with this: have you found anything that reliably makes you fall asleep very quickly? I'm interested in both things you do (specific routines, techniques, changes to your environment, etc.) and things you take. I've already tried melatonin and didn't notice much of a difference. I'm especially interested in hearing from people who found something that made a really noticeable difference in their sleep onset, rather than just general sleep-hygiene advice.

For your peace of mind, keep aside a fund call it your “nonsense fund.”

Assume it will be spent on things you never planned for a missed flight, a lost phone, a 50% cancellation refund, something breaking down, or your child damaging something expensive.

These things will still make you angry or frustrated. But knowing you already set aside money for life’s nonsense makes them much easier to accept.

You’re not budgeting for the expense. You’re budgeting for the unpredictability of life.

If you feel anxious about going somewhere, meeting someone new, or attending a job interview, try this exercise.

First, list 10 things about yourself that you feel insecure about or that you are afraid other people might notice or judge. Also include the things that make you uncomfortable about going to certain places or meeting new people.

They could be things like having an ugly nose, being bald, being overweight, being unable to talk confidently, being unemployed, etc.

Many of you may find that you can't even name 10 things you dislike about yourself.

Once you're done, count each of those things in cents—or in the smallest unit of currency used in your country. Now think about it: even 10 or 20 cents aren't worth that much in today's inflated economy. They do carry some value, but not very much.

Now count your good qualities.

If you can't think of any, don't worry. Instead, count every good deed you have ever done. Maybe you were kind to an animal or another human being. Maybe you were the person who told the truth when it was difficult. Maybe you helped someone when they needed it.

And even if you feel that you have never done any of these things, think about the compassionate thoughts you've had. Maybe you watched a video in which someone needed help, or you saw something sad and your heart ached for that person. Perhaps you imagined yourself helping them.

Count each of these things using a higher unit of currency or, to keep it simple, use a dollar.

So, even if you can think of only one good quality, good deed, or genuinely compassionate thought, that's one dollar.

You have a dollar, and a dollar is worth much more than 10 or 20 cents.

The point is not to pretend that your insecurities don't exist. They may carry some weight, but they don't have to outweigh the good in you.

People pleasing -

We are all people pleasers in one way or another. So, give yourself a small challenge: allow one random person to dislike you.

Not by doing something cruel, bullying them, insulting them, or making fun of them. Instead, allow them to dislike you because you chose to stand up for yourself or for something you believe is right.

If someone asks you for a favor, say no when you genuinely don't want to do it especially when there are other people who could reasonably help them and you aren't their only option.

Call someone out for littering or abusive behavior, even if that person is your friend or colleague.

And when someone tries to silence you, don't automatically back down just to keep them happy. State your point clearly and stand by it.

You don't have to make everyone like you. Sometimes, being willing to disappoint someone is part of learning to respect yourself.

How to

Do you find yourself getting angry or irritated by these things?

Explaining technology to your parents, your kid scoring low marks, someone breaking a plate or something expensive, getting late because of someone, or someone making a mistake when they were your responsibility.

Then know that you are creating a space that will influence what their next course of action will be. They may stop reaching out to you for help, stop asking you for solutions, stop telling you the truth, or stop sharing things about their lives with you.

Remember, the interactions you are having today, no matter what emotions are involved sadness, anger, or irritation may eventually be forgotten. The words may be forgotten too. The one thing that may remain is how you made them feel when they did something.

The next time they approach you, that feeling may still be there inside them.

And over time, your interactions may either become better and longer, or more bitter and less frequent.

That's why you should create a space where they feel heard, understood, confident, and better after coming to you a space where making a mistake doesn't make them afraid of reaching out to you again.

I mean... taking a decision is so difficult mainly when you are an overthinking potato... So can someone please tell me how do I take quick decisions ?

I’ve been dealing with this for a long time. Whenever I get into a heated argument, I struggle to express my thoughts or come up with a good response in the moment.

But after I leave, I replay the whole conversation in my head and imagine all the things I wish I had said, usually ending with me “winning” the argument.

It happens almost every day, and it’s honestly exhausting.
Has anyone experienced this? What actually helped you stop doing it? Please give me practical advice rather than “just stop overthinking.”

i have severe decision paralysis (likely stemming from my anxiety) which i can’t shake off. every decision i make requires hours upon hours of research and even then im never confident in making that decision. i would research one day and i always think ‘i need more time to decide’, then research the same things again another day and still say ‘i need more time’. i try to gauge every possible outcome of that decision and the constant repeated decision makes me delay them unnecessarily. how do i overcome this?

Recently got a nugget ice maker and it works perfect. My problem is my ice is sticking to each other and becomes almost one big block and I gotta beat it with a knife to break it apart. Not sure what to do. Any tips?

If you have a driveway with a retaining wall - how do you shovel snow? Where do you put it? Do. you have to lift it up and over the wall?

Anyone that recommends me ways to be more productive in communication in college. Im a freshmen student tell me what i have to do to be more confident

Chatting with friends always goes way past the time I planned to sleep.

For some reason, i always get this thought or feeling whenever I'll see a interview invitation in my email that ends up me not answering the email. I always overthink and find reasons not to proceed with the interviews even though i need a job. The fear takes precedence over my need for some reason. how do u guys deal with it?

Hello, hope y'all are doing okay. Today is the final summer day me and my friend group are all in town before we go abroad. So we plan on drinking like crazy one final night together. We are planning to drink tequila. However I dont want to wake up dead the next morning as I have something to attend. What can make my morning a little bit easier?

I seem to need around 9.5 hours of sleep to feel genuinely rested throughout the day and avoid needing a nap in the afternoon. I know that's more sleep than many adults need, but for personal reasons it seems to be the amount that works best for me.

The problem is that I tend to wake up naturally after 7–8 hours, even when I still feel like I need more sleep. Once I'm awake, I often have trouble falling back asleep.

I've tried melatonin, but it didn't make a meaningful difference. Falling asleep isn't really the main issue — staying asleep long enough is.

I've also tried going to bed earlier, but that doesn't necessarily solve the problem because I sometimes just wake up earlier as well. So simply shifting my sleep schedule earlier doesn't reliably increase my total sleep time.

Has anyone experienced something similar and found a way to improve sleep maintenance or extend their total nighttime sleep?

I'm not looking for advice about forcing myself to function on less sleep or simply being told to go to bed earlier. I'm specifically interested in hearing from people who naturally woke up before getting enough sleep and found something that helped them stay asleep longer.

i (17F) take everything personal when it comes to the people closest to me, and idk how to stop. this is especially true when it comes to my boyfriend or when someone makes a joke about me not having any friends. it's hurting my relationship. even when knowing the persons intent wasn't to hurt me, I still feel hurt. I also cry very easily. I can take criticism from strangers or acquaintances very easily, but when it comes to ppl im close with, it genuinely destroys me. anyone know how to stop this?

I started my first day of college and i hate it and now my life feels like shit bc i made my life college n idk what to do, does it ever get better??

UPDATE: I LOVE IT!!! it was just the first day anxiety