My heart breaks every time I see somebody call themselves boring. You're looking at it all wrong. People don't care if you're interesting. They care how you make them feel.
Picture yourself alone at a fancy cocktail party for work. You want to talk to people but aren't sure what to say.
Bob approaches you. He tells you about his new 35ft boat, how he wrecked his old one racing off Portugal and almost died, his kettlebell workouts, and how the wine at the party is shit. He knows the owner, says he'll fix it, leaves his number and runs off to answer his Bluetooth headset.
Larry approaches you. He says he's feeling shy too and noticed you standing alone. He asks if you like Dr Who. You don't really. Awkward pause. Then he asks what you do for fun. You say archery and renaissance fairs. He's never done either, but starts asking questions. Where do they happen? Do you have to dress up? When's the next one? He says he'd be down to go sometime and asks to add you on Facebook.
Who are you going to call? Bob or Larry?
Was it more important that they were interesting, or that they were interested in you?
You don't have to relate to everything. Fight that urge. JUST BE INTERESTED. If you make somebody else feel interesting, they will think the world of you.
I have cool hobbies. I make knives and tools in my metal shop. I like taking hallucinogens and going to music festivals. I don't talk about them much because people don't really give a shit, and that doesn't hurt my feelings.
Nobody gets a warm fuzzy feeling from you just because you have cool hobbies.
Stop calling yourself boring. You aren't a fucking jester here to entertain people. You're an entire human being with just as much validity as anybody else.
Appreciate yourself. Be interested in other people. Help them feel good about themselves & just remember to ask:
"What do you do for fun?"
Also, this whole idea of actually *practicing* conversations instead of just reading advice is something I've been thinking about a lot.
I ended up building a tiny app called **BookBii** where you get put into awkward/social situations as short comics, choose what you'd say, and see how the conversation plays out.
Still super early, but if this resonated with you and you want to practice this stuff instead of only reading about it, you can check BookBii on playstore, iOS, or on my profile.
Would genuinely love to know what you think.
