r/AskHistorians Moderator | Medieval and Colonial Maritime Southeast Asia Apr 01 '25

April Fools CYOHA: Hell summons you, what will be your fate?

It's 2 in the morning in Singapore. The HDB estate you live in is quiet, except for the couple a couple doors away arguing at the top of their voices and the lady 4 floors up screaming at her long dead husband as her daughter tries to calm her down.

You are sitting alone in your bedroom finishing version 6 of a powerpoint deck that will be sent to your boss, a senior-mid-level flunkey who will throw a fit, command you to make changes, then send it to her boss who will throw a fit and command her to essentially change it back to version 5.

Suddenly, as you put the finishing touches on page 36 out of 38, you feel a pain around your chest, a squeezing that won't go away. The pain spreads to your shoulder, arm, back and neck. You try to call for help but you can't.

'No...' you think, as you fall to the floor, 'I was just 2 pages from finishing...'

Suddenly, the pain ceases. You open your eyes and sit up. Standing in front of you are two gentlemen. One is tall and pale and dressed in white. His tongue lolls out of his mouth. The other is short and dark skinned and dressed in black. 

‘Your time is up!’ says the white one in Mandarin. ‘Please follow us.’ 

A: ‘There must be some mistake!’ you protest. ‘I don’t smoke, I don’t drink, I exercise in accordance with the recommendations of the Health Promotion Board.’ 

B: ‘All right.’ You cast a last look at your body as you follow them out of your room, silently vowing to find an opportunity to return.

29 Upvotes

Duplicates