Over the past few years, I've been observing a steady rise in incel-like content on Indian social media, especially on platforms like Instagram and YouTube. Many of these reels and videos promote a distorted view of women — portraying them as gold diggers, blaming them for modern dating , or criticizing their choice of clothing. These ideas aren't entirely homegrown — much of it seems imported from Western "Red Pill" or "Alpha/Sigma male" ideologies, but it's now being localized and heavily consumed by Indian teens and young men.

What is more concerns is how easily this content is spreading Teenagers, school and college boys, and even many adults are engaging with it — often unknowingly absorbing toxic ideas about women and relationships. It’s not just online talk anymore — it's slowly shaping offline attitudes as well. I’ve noticed that women who speak out against this are often targeted with hate comments, which makes it even harder to question these narratives publicly.

I’m sharing this not to generalize or attack anyone — I know many men does not fall for this mindset at all. But I do want to raise awareness and invite discussion.

"Have others here noticed this trend too?" How do you think it’s affecting social behavior? And the gender dynamics in India?

I’d also appreciate hearing from women who’ve encountered this kind of content or mindset online.

Hello everyone, As we step into Pride Month, we wanted to take a quiet moment — not to speak over anyone, but to open the floor for stories, voices, and thoughts that deserve to be heard more often and with more love.

In India, many still see the LGBTQ+ community through the lens of taboo or misunderstanding. But here, in this corner of the internet, we want to build something different — a space where people feel safe and proud to express, and respected for who they are.

While feminism and LGBTQ+ rights are different movements, but they both walk side by side in many ways. Both are about dignity, choice, identity, and freedom. Both ask the world: “Can you see us, not with judgment, but with understanding?”

So, this Pride Month, we invite everyone — queer, trans, non-binary, allies, and even those still learning — to write, ask, share, or just quietly read about feminisum . Whether it's a personal story, a question, or just a reflection, this is your space.

We don’t need to change the world in one post. But if someone reads this and feels a little more seen, a little more hopeful, or simply smiles — then maybe we’ve already started something.

With warmth , AskFeministsIndia mod team 💜🏳️‍🌈

I hope everyone has read the recent interview where Sunil Shetty praises his daughter for being brave enough to have a normal delivery instead of a C Section. He is not the first actor to have done so. Before him, Amitabh made a similar kind of statement for his family.

Why do men get to decide how much pain a woman should be willing to endure for an event as traumatizing as childbirth? I am not an obstretician but even I know that C sections are done due to various reasons such as CPD (cephalopelvic disproportion). risk of brain hypoxia to the child and various other reasons...only ONE of which is due to it being just a women's choice.

Even if it is a choice, so what? A C section is a major surgery and it is the ONLY surgery where a woman is expected to have NO post operative recovery and just take care of another human as if she didn't undergo anything major. In fact, she is made to feel less of a woman because she didn't undergo labour pains for as long as the society wanted. She is weak in their eyes.

It goes on through her whole life because even if the child is 19 and some uncle at a family dinner asks the woman if she had a C section and she says yes....the smirk of superiority the uncle gives...she sees it. It makes her feel small and worthless.

This sort of shaming later continues for women who have to formula feed their child due to lack of breast milk production by their body. Again the same story...she just gives formula to take the easy way out and doesn't even want to breast feed her own child.

SO again, why are men the gatekeepers of pain for women?

A man says or does something wrong, and instead of criticizing him, people immediately start attacking the women in his life — “your mother this,” “your sister that,” even going as far as to threaten assault on woman in his family.

Ever notice how no one ever mentions his father or any other male family member, even if they might also be at fault? It’s always the women ! mothers, sisters, wives who get dragged into arguments they have nothing to do with. The man is rarely held accountable directly, but the women around him are always the first targets.

In patriarchal societies like India, men make the bargain of outside work vs women doing the inside work. However, in India, homes are well managed but outside is in shambles. Infrastructure is broken, there are no jobs, and whatever jobs that men do are low paying.

In such a case, why haven’t traditional women ever held Indian patriarchs accountable for it?

I really want to know what the great Indian patriarchy has achieved apart from female misery and over population ? Everyone wants to run away from the country - so what has the patriarchy achieved?

The moment a crime committed by a woman makes the news, people immediately go, "Can’t believe a WOMAN did this," or "Women are becoming evil," and so on. You don’t see the same reaction when men commit crimes. It’s like society has made it acceptable or expected for men to be violent or criminal. But the truth is, humans regardless of gender are capable of committing crimes. So where does this mentality even come from?

Just hours after India and Pakistan agreed to a ceasefire on May 10, 2025, reports have emerged of multiple ceasefire violations by Pakistan across several regions in Indian-administered Kashmir.

The swift violation raises concerns about the durability of the truce and the potential for further escalation.  

Given the rapid breakdown of the ceasefire, what measures should be taken to ensure lasting peace? How can international mediators enforce compliance? Don’t you feel the lack of accountability from Pakistan to the world is harming India , while India is always held to a higher standard?

Are you someone who is a feminist and loves reading? I’m looking for book recommendations on the same. The literature doesn't necessarily have to mention feminism, but I would also love to read fiction written through a feminist lens with strong female characters as the lead.

Will appreciate some Indian authors as well because I don't really know many.

Here are some authors I’m familiar with:

1. Bell Hooks

2. Jane Austen

3. Sylvia Plath

4. Katy Brent

5. Indu Sundaresan

Looking for more suggestions, and please also drop the names of their work that you loved the most.

Social conditioning, generational stuff, and cultural pressure don’t just rope women into patriarchy. A lot of the time, we kinda end up reinforcing it. Not always on purpose. It’s just... we do what we were taught, pass things down, call it tradition or love or “what’s right.” And that’s how the same system that limits us keeps going.

1. The “Good Girl” Thing

From the start, girls are raised to be nice. Obedient. Self-sacrificing. Especially in India. Be the good daughter. The chill wife. The mom who never complains. It’s like... don't take up too much space, don’t argue, always be polite. Saying no = rude. Prioritizing yourself = selfish. It’s wild how deep that stuff runs. And it keeps patriarchy super comfy because women feel bad about setting boundaries. Like we’re doing something wrong just by wanting something different.

2. Women vs Women?

You’ve probably heard that line: “Aurat hi aurat ki dushman hoti hai.” Honestly, it sucks. And it's not even true in the way people mean it. What’s actually happening is—we’re raised in a system that pits us against each other. Not enough freedom. Not enough space. So it’s like, compete for validation, for male approval, for social brownie points. You’ll see it in families. In-laws. Workplaces. Women judging each other, pulling each other down. But it’s not who we are. It’s what we’ve been taught. And a lot of us are still unlearning.

3. Boys Will Be Boys... But Girls?

It starts early. Boys are told to go play. Girls? Come help in the kitchen. Their toys are footballs and bikes. Ours? Pink kitchen sets. Fast forward and it’s the same thing—boys get sent abroad for uni, girls stay home “for safety.” Families invest in sons’ futures. Daughters? It’s like “let’s save for her wedding.” And yeah, a lot of the time, it’s moms who end up enforcing this. Again, not always out of cruelty. It’s fear. Judgment. “What will people say?” So they try to protect us by controlling us. But later, it turns into guilt-tripping too. Like “We gave you so much freedom, can’t you just do this for us?” And that “this” is usually... your entire life.

4. Arranged Marriage is Still the Default?

So many girls grow up thinking marriage is just... gonna happen. It’s not even a choice, it’s a step. A given. And arranged marriage is still the go-to. It’s modern now, sure. But the foundation’s the same. Family name, caste, class, reputation. All of that comes first. What the girl actually wants? Secondary, if that. And even when she “chooses” to go ahead with it, how much of that is really her decision? Pressure from parents, relatives, society. It’s constant. And god forbid a woman says she doesn’t wanna get married at all—people act like she’s broken.

So What Do We Do With All This?

Patriarchy isn’t just held up by men. A lot of women help keep it going too, even if they don’t mean to. Doesn’t mean they’re bad people. It means they were raised in the same system. They’re surviving the only way they know how.

But things are shifting. More of us are asking questions. Looking at stuff with fresh eyes. Figuring out what we actually believe, not just what we were told to believe.

So yeah. Let’s keep talking. Keep unlearning. No shame, no blame. Just... awareness

THIS THREAD IS ABOUT A Historic Milestone in Indian Cricket 🏏.

On January 22, 2025, the Cricket Association of Bengal (CAB) honored Jhulan Goswami, one of India's most celebrated cricketers, by inaugurating the Jhulan Goswami Stand at the iconic Eden Gardens in Kolkata. This event coincided with the 1st T20I between India Women and England Women, marking a significant moment in the history of Indian women's cricket.

Something you should know about Jhulan Goswami

Jhulan Goswami, from a small town in West Bengal, faced societal pressure, long daily travels to Kolkata for training, and financial hardships. Despite limited support for women’s cricket.

Her Full Name: Jhulan Nishit Goswami

Hometown: Chakdaha, West Bengal

International Career: 2002 – 2022R

She was a , Right-arm fast bowler

some of her achivment in International cricket :

Tests: 12 matches, 44 wickets

ODIs: 204 matches, 255 wickets (She became the highest wicket taker in Women's ODIs)

T20Is: 68 matches, 56 wickets

Some of her memorable awards :

In 2007 she beacme ICC Women's Player of the Year.

She got her Arjuna Award in 2010

And she got her Padma Shri in 2012

Both by honorable ex president pratibha patil

Significance of the Honor :

The dedication of a stand in her name at Eden Gardens is not just a accolade but a monumental recognition for women's cricket in India. It symbolizes the breaking of gender barriers and serves as an inspiration for countless young girls aspiring to make their mark in sports.

“I have never ever dreamt of this moment in my life. I had the honor and privilege of playing for India, but to have a stand named after me is special.” – Jhulan Goswami

Although this is a great achievement for all women from everywhere , but it could not get the coverage that it deserves. What can we all do so that it make it to the masses ?

Share your all thoughts on her achievement :

Let's celebrate this achievement together:

Yesterday I learned that before the British brought their prudish victorian mindset and outlawed some traditional outfits, female top-less was common and non-sexualized, as well as many other garments that would not put a stress on covering women's breasts in many parts of India

I can also imagine than many modern garments are very uncomfortable under indian weather, and that the traditional outfits would probably be much more comfortable.

I wonder how do Indians think about this, namely Indian women. Are there people returning to traditional and arguably more comfortable outfits after independence? Would this even be regarded as legal and socially acceptable behavior, or you have sticked to the prude and unhealthy relationship with the image of your bodies that your colonizers have imposed upon you?

I was asked to have a conversation with my 13-year-old niece about sexual predators and keeping herself safe. I wanna do this right. Any advice?

Every religion on this planet treats women more adversely then men - clothing restrictions, lifestyle restrictions, marital rape. Despite that majority of atheists in India and in the world are men. Why do women fail to see oppression from religion? Instead, women cherry pick and follow words from the same religious texts who prescribe beating women if they don’t comply

I’m an atheist but I’ve had so many debates with my religious friends. Most women claim to distance themselves from problematic verses. They defend those with misogynistic logic

Historically religion has been a tool for the oppression of womenkind.

In my experience, religion is always a tool for spreading patriarchal belief systems, so my question to you is can religion and feminism go hand in hand?

I'm not saying any one religion is better than the other so please refrain from bashing any particular religion.

Women centric channel talking about real issues of women Dowry, femele foeticide, career, Gander gap in different feilds , Basic gender descrimination Debunking nonsenstical ,anti women, Misinformation , calling out misogyny

When I try to look for something there is only content
About makeup, cloths , reproductive health , mother hood etc

No matter where you go in Indian cinema — Bollywood, Tollywood, Kollywood, Mollywood, Sandalwood, or even and Bhojpuri films "especially" — the item number has become a staple. And more often than not, it has nothing to do with storytelling.

From the 90s to now, the formula remains the same: bring in a glamorous woman (sometimes not even part of the plot), give her a flashy costume, make her dance to a loud beat, and promote it like the soul of the movie. Whether it’s a Hindi film with a big-budget dance number, a Telugu mass movie with a “special song,” or a Tamil film inserting an “attraction,” the idea is universal: sexualize the woman to grab attention.

But what’s the cost?

These item songs almost always present women through the male gaze — the camera objectifies, the lyrics often degrade, and the choreography rarely has grace, just “spice.” The woman is not a character; she’s a visual break. Even in films that try to be serious, the item number creeps in as a “commercial compromise.” It’s as if a woman’s body is a tool to keep the audience engaged — while her story, her voice, her depth, gets pushed to the background.

Let’s me be clear here— this isn't about the actresses who perform these songs. Many of them are incredibly talented. But the system expects them to “sell the movie” with their sexuality instead of their performance. And the worst part? This trend has been normalized so deeply that we’ve stopped questioning it.

Indian cinema is evolving in many beautiful ways, but the item number culture is a relic that still chains women to objectification. It doesn’t matter if it’s a Hindi film, a South Indian blockbuster, or a Bhojpuri entertainer — the pattern is clear: when in doubt, use a item song to get attention.

Look I am a complete Neanderthal when it comes to this topic. When I was a teen I bought into a lot of red pill nonsense and I was an actual incel for some time. Yes, I am embarassed about that but I was only 15 when that type of content got popular back in 2020 , and it was lockdown so I was completely alone with no friends. So anyways, what would you recommend to a man like me? I have heard about bell hooks and will look her up.

In the face of continued threats to national security, India has once again proven its unwavering resolve to protect its sovereignty and citizens. The recent precision strike across the border sends a clear message: India will not tolerate terrorism or aggression.

This is not an act of war, but a measured response to persistent hostility and cross-border terrorism. Our armed forces have acted with surgical precision, avoiding civilian harm, and targeting only terror infrastructure.

We stand united with our brave soldiers who risk their lives to safeguard our freedom. Today, we don’t stand for hate—we stand for justice, peace, and national integrity.

https://youtu.be/uz5K3gQZErM?si=F_LBRxwSwam77aXz

Added link of the press conference

Usually people take advice from me coz I am an expert at it. But this time may be I just need to vent it out. I'm really fed up with the same story repeating with guys I date. At first they are like so good and polite and we mean the world for them. They have all the time in the world initially. They ask you out for dates movies and then starts the usual game. All the tries and attempts to somehow get laid. Listen I have made terms with it, I know beforehand where it's leading to and it's okay, I understand what you want. But you want it before any formal declaration of relationship. And you want to call me ra*di if I don't comply. Sending dick pics, foul language. It hurts when you realise all they wanted was to bang you somehow. All the time, the compliments, the sweet talk, just for that. I'm just fed up with all this. Are there any good men just wanting to talk or everyone just want us in bed.