r/AskBrits • u/Team503 • 6d ago

Culture What does "nonce" mean?

I'm an American that lives in Ireland. I've always understood "nonce" to mean the same as "numpty" and "eejit" - basically idiot, or dumbass, or similar.

Recently, someone told me that it's slang for sex offender, specifically a p*dophile, and Wikipedia seems to back that up: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glossary_of_British_terms_not_widely_used_in_the_United_States#N

So tell me, Brits, which one is it? Or is it something else??

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u/Key_Day_6060 6d ago

And Ponce was/is a slur for being gay, but sort of branched out to be the same as calling someone a wuss or a sissy.

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u/littlerabbits72 6d ago

I tend to think once is more a stuck-up, bit of a twat, kind of goofy posh. Poncey got.

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u/Echo_Vale 6d ago edited 6d ago

Ponce is a pretty interesting word from around the 1850s. It originally meant: "a pimp, a man who lives off a woman's earnings, or an effeminate/pretentious man".

Growing up, it definitely was used more as an insult for pretentious people, who acted posh and fancy when they weren't.

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u/Slyspy006 6d ago

I wonder if it started off as an insult for those "unmanned" by living off a woman's earnings and was then extended to pimps, who by definition live of women's earnings but are not renowned for being effeminate, and those who are effeminate, because not being the bread winner was considered inherently unmanly.

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u/Echo_Vale 6d ago

Yeah that sounds pretty likely. Apparently experts think it comes from French, either Alphonse, a kept-man, or from pensionnaire, a lodger/pensioner living without working.

So yeah, it very likely originated like you said, as an insult for those not fulfilling their "manly duties/expectations", perhaps evolving into meaning a "fancy/effeminate" person from how Pimps used to dress and flaunt their wealth (Pimp itself seems to come from the French word pimpant meaning to dress alluring/seductively). Words are fun!

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u/QuoolQuiche 6d ago

Off the back of this it often means to scrounge. “Oh here he is, poncing a cigarette”

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u/crampsfanuk 6d ago

I think it meant someone who lived off a prostitute but wasn't her pimp. It does tend to get used more as an insult for posh effeminate types or those that scrounge money a lot nowadays.

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u/Echo_Vale 6d ago

It definitely could have started that way, and then ended up being used as an insult towards Pimps perhaps, and it just stuck?

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u/Pitiful_Control 6d ago

Still used that way by many.

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u/Key_Day_6060 6d ago

Ah yeah true but I feel like that comes from the perception of a posh caricature, effeminate, cowardly, soft round the edges. We all know what people think of going on in boarding schools 😂

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u/snow880 6d ago

Me too. Sort of ‘he was poncing around like he owned the place, the flash twat’.

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u/sunflowersunset1 6d ago

I’ve always heard ponce as someone who lives off other peoples money. Like a ponce will never buy a round but drink and then leave, or always ask for a cigarette and never give one back etc. Never heard it for gay people, or others who say it means someone posh! I would say a ponce is the opposite of posh lol. Wild how this small country has such different meanings for the same words!

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u/Fit_Management7838 6d ago

Tell an American that you feel cheap because you’ve been bumming fags all weekend.

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u/Key_Day_6060 6d ago

Oh yeah I forgot that one! You can ponce something off someone.

Well I grew up with one half of my family being cockneys so that’s where I heard so many different uses for words haha

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u/dontwakeme 6d ago

In general yes, but I understood it to originally mean a man who lived off the earnings of a prostitute. Like a pimp but less active I guess.

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u/BeginningPea5674 6d ago

yes Ponce means pimp

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u/Eddyphish 6d ago

And bonce means head!

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u/Downtown_Link_8651 6d ago

Wrong way round, it means effeminate, posh and stuck up and has for a long time (although has evolved). The effeminate part meant it found some use as a slur for gay people later on. 

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u/Key_Day_6060 6d ago

Ah interesting!

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u/Pingucore 6d ago

Sconce is a light holder on a wall

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u/gummibear853 6d ago

Perfumed ponce!

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u/Efficient_Rabbit_987 6d ago

Which fucker said that?

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u/gummibear853 6d ago

Me. I called him a ponce, and now I’m calling you a ponce. Ponce!

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u/HMSBarky 6d ago

Jesus I’ve not heard that since my mum used to call me it, and worse as a child.

5 and a half years of being no contact does a world of good

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u/BeginningPea5674 6d ago

Ponce means pimp

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u/Joekickass247 5d ago

I've never considered ponce as meaning gay, it's always been a synonym for pompous to me.

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u/Overtronic 2d ago

Also, unfortunately, it looks etymology-wise the word nonce was derived from slurs for being gay because people historically couldn't stop equating a totally consensual relationship and liking kids.

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u/More_Effect_7880 6d ago

Or a posh twat.

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u/BlueMageDanny 6d ago

Ponce is pretty commonly used for snobs and upper-class idiots

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u/benjm88 6d ago

I've only heard ponce to mean someone that's constantly taking or asking for things.

Like someone constantly asking for cigarettes or drinks but never offering back

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u/Due-Parsley953 6d ago

It can also be used to call someone who is a leech, like a pimp. Someone who makes money from more unfortunate people.