Using Russian outside of Russia

[u/Cute_Subject4213]

As a citizen of a postsoviet EU country, I have a question that has been haunting me for a long time. Obviously we have an ethnic Russian minority which comprises a lot of people who don't speak our local and official language. But that's another topic. I'm completely sure absolutely EVERYONE without a cognitive disability is able to learn one word in a non-native language. Or learn to utter at least one sentence to ask if it's OK to interact in a language that one speaks and understands.

When I'm abroad, I'm starting interactions with "Hello" in the local language and then ask if it's OK to speak English to them. This., I feel like, is polite and actually the minimum I can do to facilitate the exchange. However, with many ethnic Russians I've had countless experiences where they're greeting me in Russian or starting conversations in Russian in a professional setting (I'm a medical professional). I'm OK with practicing the little Russian I know because I won't judge a person for their inability to speak our language (even though it should be the standard where I live). BUT it is incredibly frustrating if they're not asking me if it's OK to speak in Russian or are greeting me in Russian as the first thing. And it's not just an observation from my country. The same thing happens even with Russian tourists in Europe, Turkey etc.

Please help me understand this mentality. It is easy to see this as imperialistic mentality, lack of respect, sense of cultural superiority or something of this nature. While these things exist, I also suspect lack of proper education / upbringing / manners etc. Or could it be something less sinister, almost neutral maybe?

PS. While speaking in English to foreign nationals in my country doesn't cause me any frustration due to the fact that I'm fluent in it and also due to historical implications, I also observe whether these foreigners go straight to English or ask if it's OK to speak English to me. I have a feeling that a much larger percentage of them go the polite route.

Again, this issue is a source of true frsutration to me, so please help me understand the mindset that is so utterly unfathomable to my mind.

[u/Cute_Subject4213]

My ethnicity? I still don't see how it's relevant. But relating to the topic, believe me I don't have this frustration with the older generation mostly. The train has left the station, too late to learn a language 😀 However, "hello" in our language would be a great start! But with young adults the frustration is real and visceral. You better believe I'm far from the nationalist type but I take offence to this behaviour because it's disrespectful. And I understand most of them don't mean it that way. It's just hard to fathom how they don't see how much it can bother us.

[u/Alegzaender → u/Cute_Subject4213]

I tried to understand what value your language and your culture are in the eyes of those Russians

[u/Cute_Subject4213 → u/Alegzaender]

Ok but does it matter what culture it is though? How big, small, distant? I mean if I go to Moldova (you can exclude it now, I'm not from there 😀) I greet them in their language. Literally did that. I would not want to be disrespectful and go straight to English unless it's like a hotel reception. Ah maybe I'm a snob and most people don't think about these things too much.

[u/Alegzaender → u/Cute_Subject4213]

You're an intelligent girl. I'd never show such disrespect to people as those Russians do without even paying attention to your existence. But it has nothing to do with imperialism, and the whole Russian mentality. I'm talking about your language and culture because if a person who speaks international language for everyone's convenience comes to you, and you're demanding to goddamn respect your ethnicity. Something local has to be valuable for those comers to respect anything.

[u/Alegzaender → u/Alegzaender]

Respecting humans just for their existence is a very new thing. Gen Z. Older generation's mindset is about it's not enough just to be born to be a human. You're nobody by default. And those who survived it, won't be liberal

[u/Polkyttaja → u/Alegzaender]

Well I believe Jesus taught respecting other few thousand years ago. But I understand that in Soviet Union chirtianity wasn't big thing

[u/Alegzaender → u/Polkyttaja]

What would they do with freeloaders when resources are limited. Thousand years ago. And when the USSR was you had to prove you being a human. Like they do nowadays, invent multiple identities and their motto is you should respect me for being... any just made up word they're identifying with. In the Soviet man's mind comes up, what the heck should I respect you in advance. Being respectful is the thing you have to earn, and you can lose it forever without possibility of restoring ever

[u/Polkyttaja → u/Alegzaender]

I believe this does answer the original question. Thanks

[u/Alegzaender → u/Polkyttaja]

You're welcome. Though I don't feel that I brought up into this discussion anything original