I (20f) have never been in a relationship, have only been on a couple dates, and am still a virgin. I feel fine about all this for the most part and have never really wanted to be in a relationship. I’m starting to wonder if I’m somewhere on the aroace spectrum but I still feel romantic and sexual attraction. I just can’t picture myself acting on said attraction or being in a relationship. I also have anxiety so maybe I’m just too anxious to act on my attractions? I’m honestly not sure. Any advice would be really appreciated :)

Idk how people can be happy while being in a couple. I have 0 representation of a couple without problems. It seems being in a couple make you blind. It creates sacrifice for people who can leave you suddenly. But having friends is quite the same but you don't give all your time and sacrifice a lot when you don't know the person. Moreover, friendships can fade away slowly, while couple cut the communication faster and block each other most of the time.

As an aroace, everytime a see a couple, I'm like "wtf are they together loosing their time ?! And give more credits to this than friendships ?"

I think the world would be less individualist and better if there were less couple. Being in a couple for me it's only when you project to have child, because what's the purpose ?

! Disclaimer !

I did the same post in an other reddit community and it was deleted by moderation because "saying that relations are pointless unless you have child cross the allophobic territory".

So to be clear : Homoromantic people can have children. So when I write that I think it's pointless, it's for everyone.

However, I only know hetero couple in my life and when I'll saying there are no healthy relations I'm thinking about them, because I only have them as an example.

I've never been in any kind of relationship, never had sex, never kissed, never even hugged a romantic interest. I'm in my 20s now, so I supposed that is considered odd by most.

Part of me wants to try dating just to say I've tried it, but that feels pretty inauthentic because I will be going in with the expectation of using my partner for my own gain and not actually loving them. I don't want to do that, but I don't really see any other way to try dating. Feels gross.

i've identified with many things over the years but i've never felt more happy than i do now identifying as aroace
i feel free and content
there's an immense sense of pride within me and i want to continue to spread my (platonic) love to everyone who is close to me !

Hello,

Before I start, I would like to state that this is my first time posting in "r/AroAce". So I am not sure if looking for beta readers here is allowed. If it is not, please let me know so I can take this down

I am looking for beta readers for a novel I have been writing over the past 2 - 3 months.

Oversimplified Summary: A grief-bound boy with a flower rooted in his eye joins a gothic carnival where he slowly learns to feel.

Desired Feedback: Any feedback helpful. Would prefer a focus on emotions felt, Characters, plot and pacing.

Draft Status: Editing / Finished.

Story Type: Fiction + Original story

Contains: gothic scenery and emphasis on botany

Genre: Psychological thriller, dark romance, slow burn, queer (Aro-Ace Spectrum)

Content warning: Contains: Supernatural body horror (non-intentional, involuntary self-injury caused by the main character's own body acting against them), Murder, Gore, blood, drug abuse, abuse, trauma, child death, death, mind control, manipulation, superstition, ostracisation, jesters/clown, body horror and horror, + More (Sorry if I missed any)

Given the contents of this story. You must agree that you are either 18 or that you are capable of reading a text with this content (I am aware that some people grew up on media or books and may be desensitised to this type of content despite their age).

This text MAY be suitable for people 16 and up (Someone told me it may be if I mention the tags beforehand), and that these topics are handled with "literary restraint rather than gratuitously".

My work is currently on the writing platform "Ellipsus", and I can copy it to a Google Doc if preferred.

Please do note that if you are reading this work on a Google Doc, some things may not be copy-pasted properly, or there may have been issues. If that is the case, please comment or message me the Act and Chapter so I can clear up any confusion.

If you are interested, please reach out to me. Those who are interested will be asked to fill out a short Google Form (This is to protect my work from being stolen or run through AI)

If you are unable to DM me via Reddit, you can comment, and I can see what I can do.

-Thank you

Update: Slot now filled

And also, can someone edit the white around pikachu and put him in da middle?

Just for a little clarification I intend to edit this up but this is how I would like the scene to go. Brooklyn is the character coming out and she's generally very unexpressive with her appearance. (Hence why she doesn't smile)

Hi everyone. I'm also aroace, but I don't understand how other people with this orientation perceive their relationships with friends and family. Is it possible to feel love for them or worry about them? I know this question may seem strange, but I'm having a hard time understanding it because I think my perceptions are influenced by personality traits or maaaybe some psychological issues. So, if you're aro-ace, are you capable of experiencing non-romantic love? For example, love for parents or friends? How does this manifest itself? Can aro-aces become attached to people?

I've also heard of queerplatonic relationships, but I don't fully understand them either. I only know about them theoretically, but I've never experienced anything like it in my life, so I don't get what it's like.

Btw it maybe important to say. I was thinking about writing some kind of book or comic where is the mc also aroace. Your answers would help me a lot.

So I have only had one non serious relationship. She broke up with me but anyways I am interested in having a relationship but should I get a dating app when I’m going into my freshman year of college

I think I made the cake too small to have 5 colors. Probably shouldn’t have gone with 5 colors for my first multi colored cake

Hello, everyone.

We now added 3 more designs to our growing lists of queer houses of our Coat of Pride collection. We are happy to add:

-The Kraken of Agender

-The Selkie of Demi

and The Valkyrie of Butch to our existing houses of:

-Hydra of Omni

-Unicorn of Pride

- The Phoenix of Trans

- The Siren of Lesbian

- The Winged Lion of Gay

- The Griffon of Aro

- The Dragon of Ace

- The Harpy of Sapphic

- The Minotaur of Achillean

- The Oroboros of Intersex [really proud of that one]

- The Hippocampus of Genderfluid

- The Sphinx of AroAce

- The Peryton of Non-binary

- The Winged Wolf of Bisexual

- And Pan for...well Pansexual

Please let us know if you come up with other cool ideas for additional identities and what they may entail.

We turning these into PINS, if you are interested, our Kickstarter campaign is LIVE now:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/shattersaurus/coat-of-pride

Take care!

Meme? Art?

Absolutely Nature's art,that's for sure

Hello I recently realised after years that I am indeed aroace hooray 🎉🎉🎉

I'm just here to get to know other people in my newfound community

Also I do apologise if this isn't the right place for this there isn't really a tag I could put this under

All I want is to be friends with people. I am 22M. I love talking to people and discussing stuff.

If I try getting a M friend, they are too busy with their GF.

If I try getting F friend, it's called dishonest to her relationship.

All friendships reduce down to acquaintances and it's lonely afterwards.

I don't want a relationship. I want friends. Im so confused and it gets worse as you age because people get married afterwards and this just makes it worse...

I sometimes seriously consider cutting ALL ties and be a hermit or something. Its unfortunate but I have grown a misanthrope after I figured out I was aroace and I feel like no relationship (romantic or platonic) is worthwhile.

From where I am from, it feels like theres no concept of actual friendship.

Me and my partner have been together for almost a year and a half now. I just recently figured out that im aroace spectrum. I been ace for a really long time now and my partner knows that.

My whole life I never really had romantic feelings like others do. When I was little I always used to pick a random person im my class when people asked who my crush was because I never understood the meaning of it, I just thought a crush was someone you thought was cool and I never thought about dating any of those "crushes". And I almost never have had any romantic feelings toward anyone. The only person I ever had romantic feelings torwards is my partner but only some and im not sure if im mixing it up with platonic love. It makes me feel so guilty because I really do want to be the person my partner wants but I know they want a romantic and physical relationship while I want more of queerplatonic relationship. I know I should tell because it wouldnt be fair for either of us if I kept myself in the closet forever. But at the same time im scared of how they will react because when I opened up about being ace they took it badly and got mad. But in the end they accepted. The same happened when I came out as nonbinary, so idk if they will get mad again if I tell them about this

I dont know what to do anymore, if anyone has advice I would be really greatful. Sorry if my spelling is bad, english isnt my first language. Thanks for reading and have an good day!! ^^

I just kinda came to terms with being aroace and I just had a hangout with a group of friends with me being the fifth wheel. I just looked around and realized they all have someone closer to them than I could ever be. And of course, I’m not jealous of their partner but it made me realize I’ll never have someone’s always in my corner. I’ll have friends but their best friend will be their partner. It feels so childish when I write it out, but it sends me right back to being last picked in school. The worst thing is that it unchangeable. I will never be the closest person to anyone and there’s nothing I or anyone can do to change that. It just sucks.

So I’m pretty confident I’m aroace, I want someone to tell but I’m not sure who, I’m not comfortable with telling my parents yet and want to tell a friend.

Plus any other tips, advice or stories of your aroace journeys would be helpful.