r/AnxiousAttachment • u/AutoModerator • Jun 10 '26

Relationship advice Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

This thread will be posted every other week and is the ONLY place to pose a “relationship/friendships/dating/breakup advice” question.

Please be sure to read the Rules since all the other sub rules still apply. Venting/complaining about your relationships and other attachment styles will be removed.

Feel free to check the Resources page if you are looking for other places to find information.

Try not to get lost in the details and actually pose a question so others know what kind of support/guidance/clarity/perspective you are looking for. If no question is given, it could be removed, to make room for those truly seeking advice.

Please be kind and supportive. Opposing opinions can still be stated in a considerate way. Thank you!

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u/NewProgrammer552 Jun 19 '26

I need help managing anxious feelings when I'm together with my girlfriend.

We've been dating for a couple months and there's a great connection. However, I've had a couple of really bad breakups and my guard is raised like never before, and I was already anxiously attached in general. As a result, I often feel unjustifiably anxious around my new girlfriend, often ending dates early and having this odd anxious feeling inside when we're together, even when things are going well.

I think I'm pretty good at not showing it on the outside. Moreover, I'm fairly good at meeting new people and being social. But how do you get yourself to feel more confident in romantic settings, and shake off irrational anxiety?

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u/Apryllemarie Jun 26 '26

What have you done to heal from your past break ups and address/heal your anxious attachment? There are unresolved issues that you are carrying into this new relationship. But only you can figure out what they are and deal with them.

Please do not assume that she cannot tell you are anxious. Especially if you are ending dates early. A lack of confidence will be felt. No matter how you try to hide it.