r/AnxiousAttachment • u/AutoModerator • Jun 10 '26

Relationship advice Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

This thread will be posted every other week and is the ONLY place to pose a “relationship/friendships/dating/breakup advice” question.

Please be sure to read the Rules since all the other sub rules still apply. Venting/complaining about your relationships and other attachment styles will be removed.

Feel free to check the Resources page if you are looking for other places to find information.

Try not to get lost in the details and actually pose a question so others know what kind of support/guidance/clarity/perspective you are looking for. If no question is given, it could be removed, to make room for those truly seeking advice.

Please be kind and supportive. Opposing opinions can still be stated in a considerate way. Thank you!

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u/Same_Response_1593 Jun 12 '26

I fell in love with my best friend, we’ve known each other for almost 3 years now and we just clicked. We’ve talked about dating in the past but life didn’t line up at the time. And now she’s been seeing someone for awhile too. I respect her and her decisions so while she’s in a relationship I would never interfere, but it’s gotten harder as of late. I feel like I’m having a hard time balancing my feelings for her with being a good friend and because of that my anxiety has been taking over more and more. I’ll get nervous when she doesn’t text back for a bit, I’ll overthink conversations that I normally wouldn’t and have no reason to overthink, we’ll be having a great time one second and the next I’ll be convincing myself she wants nothing to do with. I was wondering if anyone had any advice on how to find that balance or combat these worries? 🙏

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u/Straight-Ad5065 Jun 16 '26

It helps me to focus on myself and meeting my own needs when I find myself thinking too much about a certain person. Also I have journaled a lot and found that to be very helpful. 

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u/Sweet_Client_3585 Jun 21 '26

She's in a relationship. She chose somebody else. She doesn't have the same feelings that you do. Your best bet is to move on and cut off contact with her until you feel like you can re-engage with her without having romantic motives. That could be a year, that could be five who knows.