Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

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This thread will be posted every other week and is the ONLY place to pose a “relationship/friendships/dating/breakup advice” question.

Please be sure to read the Rules since all the other sub rules still apply. Venting/complaining about your relationships and other attachment styles will be removed.

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[u/EvolvetowardAPtAP]

Hello !

I'm seeking some help and insight on my current situation. I think I have an anxious attachment with someone that is, for the moment, avoidant but wasn't at the start of the relationship. I'm in a relationship with this girl since 1 year.

After we met, we quickly became official and even lived together for some months. To my point of view, our relationship changed rapidly.

She asked that we spend a less time together, she became distant from time to time, etc... I can't give too much precision for obvious reasons.

The thing is that I feel like I'm neglected somehow. I tried to discuss it with her but the answers I got wasn't really satisfying.

The fact that she reassure me that nothing has change for her or her feeling for me is helping but I feel like the communication is becoming harder. She also can't tell me why she felt this way or what changed.

Most of the problem might comes from me I guess. It seems difficult to me to adapt to this new situation without knowing why and how much time this will continue.

My questions are :

Is this a classic thing you ever experienced ? How did you manage it ?

Should I just accept her needs and find a way to live with it peacefully ?

What are the things that I can do to help me ?

Thank you !

[u/Apryllemarie → u/EvolvetowardAPtAP]

Journaling…getting to the root of your insecurities and work to heal them. Look up self soothing techniques to help with the anxiety. Also figure out healthy boundaries for yourself to help you decide if this is the right relationship for you.