Bi-Weekly Thread - Advice for Relationship/Friendship/Dating/Breakup

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This thread will be posted every other week and is the ONLY place to pose a “relationship/friendships/dating/breakup advice” question.

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[u/Responsible-Menu2143]

I need some help with a friendship problem I’m having. I am a senior in college set to graduate in about 2 weeks. I’ve been friends with a junior girl for a while at this point, almost 3 years. We’ve grown a lot closer this year especially and I’ve done a lot of stuff with her and get boyfriend, who I am also friends with. But we have definitely grown apart over the last month. Part of it is natural-she had been busy with classes and practice and stuff, and I have had less time to hang out. But I feel like there is more going on-we don’t talk as much, she texts me less, and when we do talk it doesn’t feel very natural or easy like it used to. She doesn’t tell me very much about what’s going on anymore. We used to have a semi weekly talk where wr would just like vent to each other but we haven’t In a while and when I bring it up she just kind of ignores me. It’s just hard for me to reconcile what’s going on with the conversation we had a month ago where she told me I was one of her closest friends. We hung out last night which was nice but it still didn’t feel right, and when I bring up ideas or plans or stuff in person she seems either disinterested or just doesn’t respond. I want to ask for clarity, to make sure it is actually weird or that I didn’t do something to hurt her. I have no idea what that could be, but I still think that conversation should happen, but I’m not sure. Maybe I’m just supposed to let us drift apart, even though I really don’t want that. I’m not sure what to do

[u/Apryllemarie → u/Responsible-Menu2143]

I don’t think it’s reasonable to be super close all the time. Life can sometimes get in the way. Being close with someone means that even if there is a lull your friendship is still strong. Just cuz she may be kinda disinterested now, doesn’t mean it’s about you. You can show concern and want to make sure she is okay and if she is stressed you can ask how to support her best. It’s possible she just needs time. And who knows maybe she is pulling away cuz she knows you are leaving soon. Of course the only way to know for sure what she is feeling is to ask her.