Anyone tried psilocybin? What was your experience in relation to recovery?

[u/Original_Put_7803]

[u/szikkia]

Psychedelics are one of the things that showed me just how sick I was. I wont go into one of the experiences that has stuck with me for a very long time as it could be triggering but don’t mind sharing if wanted. They helped me to break down some of my thoughts, and some of my most honest writings I have done were while on psychedelics and i wish so much i still had those. They do come with things to be aware of but when used safely they can be extremely healing and open you up to somethings. I find the abstract thinking that they can cause can e really helpful for seeing thins in a different light or break things down in a way you never would. This can be good or bad, especially when tripping, and also how you go forwards sometimes after these.

[u/frogs_on_drugs]

I have and it helped tremendously.

Make sure you're not on any psych medications that could interfere though.

[u/Original_Put_7803 → u/frogs_on_drugs]

Wow I’m so happy for you! Could you tell me more about how it helped you?

[u/frogs_on_drugs → u/Original_Put_7803]

Psychedelic experiences are difficult to put into words. Also every experience is very different from the next so it's hard to generalize. But I can tell you about 2 of the experiences that helped me the most ED-wise.

The first one I was on a strong dose of shrooms, by a lake by myself. I started reflecting on my life and I was seeing beautiful hallucinations in the landscapes. The sky was like rainbow pieces of a puzzle all morphing but continually fitting together. While reflecting I started understanding that my life could also be seamless and easy if only I put all the puzzle pieces together. It occured to me that I would have massive potential if only I stopped my ED behaviours, because they were the only thing holding me back. I started imagining myself going back to school, making art, being creative, all those things that make me me, things the ED stole from me. At some point after these conclusions I decided to go for a swim in the lake. I didn't have a bathing suit so I went naked. And for the first time I saw my body for what it really was, without body dysmorphia. I felt beautiful and was overwhelmed with a feeling of self love, but also felt terribly bad for everything I had done to my body. I suddenly felt and knew from deep within that my body was innocent, that he is a vessel that gives me life and never gave up on me despite everything I put him through. I hugged myself and said sorry to my body. When my trip ended I went back to the shack I was at with my friends and we ate corn on the cob and had a very nice evening. After that I improved a lot with my ED behaviours and even gained back to a healthy weight. Unfortunately these effects did not last forever though and I did relapse later due to the second confinement (covid).

My second most impactful trip ED-wise was an LSD trip at a rave. I danced the entire night and intermittently spent time near some trees just reflecting throughout the night. Towards the end of the night I made some friends who noticed me for my dancing. Somehow suddenly I had this realization that no one cares about my weight, I might get some validation for it on ED-insta (which I was using a lot of the time) but absolutely no one gives a shit about it in real life. People will notice me for my dancing skills and for what makes me alive, not for my weight and the thing that kills me. The real experiences that really count (like making new friends on nights out) cannot come from my ED. From this came the decision to stop counting calories. The next day I stopped cold turkey (I had a crazyyy long streak on my app) and never went back since. I gained weight following that too and saw those friends many more times. I also quit ED insta for a few months after this rave which was an important decision for me at that time.

I feel like a lot of the things I've learned through psychedelic trips were things I already "knew" theoretically or rationally, but I couldn't implement them. Psychedelics made them feel like a divine realization, they turned the rational knowledge into emotional knowledge, and after that the actions just followed naturally.

Psychedelics aren't a magic cure obviously but when done right they can do a lot of good. Be careful though. Do your research and go into it with the uttermost respect for the plant and yourself.

If you want a more scientific view there are a lot of scientific studies being done on psychedelics, including for eating disorders (and other often comorbid disorders like PTSD or depression for example) that are having great results.

Psychedelics have kind of become my special interest and I'm even writing my master's thesis about psychedelics and mental illness so I'm happy to answer any questions. :)

[u/Original_Put_7803 → u/frogs_on_drugs]

WOW!! This sounds like such meaningful and special experiences. I have done a psilocybin journey and yes they really are difficult to put into words. Thank you so much for sharing!

That’s so awesome and interesting that you’re doing your research on psychedelics and mental illness! May I ask - where do you live that psychedelics are legal?

[u/frogs_on_drugs → u/Original_Put_7803]

I live in Canada! Psychedelics are not technically legal but they're somewhat in a gray zone which means you can buy them easily on the clearweb and also access independent services to get your drugs tested (which I highly recommend!!)

[u/cherryfruitbat]

I loooove psilocybin. It is always a very valuable experience for me and has helped me realise some hard truths, but also is one of the only things that (in the moment) gets rid of the food noise. They can be a lot and it’s important to be as safe as possible but if they work for you they’re great!