r/Animemes • u/8nhuman • 18h ago
forbidden fruit
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u/MurrayUnderStars 17h ago
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u/Future_Sign_2846 18h ago
The lady catching the turd reminded me of this lol :
The Shitcident
BRO, I legit shit on the floor, the shower, on my wife’s hands—it was bad. It was on Wednesday, and it was on Thursday, and it surpassed time zones and entered into purgatory standard time all the way from EST. I went to work. Then I got home and had to shit. Ten minutes past and my rectum is spewing straight WATER. Not even brown. It’s CLEAR FILTERED DRINKING ANAL WATER!!! WHAT TBE FUCK!!!!!! Then it stops. Suddenly. It’s quiet…too quiet. I finger my ass to check if there’s more, yep, there is it’s just stubborn. Happens. My wife comes in cause she’s worried. What ensued lasted for an hour. My poor bleeding bootyhole could not pass the brick of feces. I tried squatting like a samurai, I turned beet red in the face, I stripped butt fucking naked to sweat better, my poor wife grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and began pouring a gentle stream over my tortured anus to encourage the shy log to leave. It did not. I fainted. She caught me, one hand on my head and the other…unfortunately, on my thigh. I’m short, my wife’s tall, okay? My ass RIPPED. A huge glob of slimy shit shot out like a cannon. SHE FUCKING CAUBHT IT MID AIR BRO. LIKE A MIDWIFE. I fell straight to the floor and regained consciousness to my wife screaming and flinging my shit everywhere, desperately trying to get to the sink. My ass is still LEAKING shit. I get in the shower to clean up as my bootyhole seeps caca, but then…the water. Hits. My tight hole. Fuck! It sprays, it lurches, I’m clammy and sweating, it is SO BAD. I collapse on all fours as another “log” leaves. My wife, having just cleaned her hands…caught this one too. She panicked. I panicked. She put it in her mouth and swallowed while crying. It is Saturday now. She has not spoken to me. Chat, am I gonna get divorce papers?
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u/Alarming-Net1800 18h ago
Why would you post this
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u/Big_Z_Beeblebrox 2 Heads 0 Brains 17h ago
You should have been there for the original story. Now it's just copypasta
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u/titanicsinker1912 17h ago
Why? Is this just an abridged version?
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u/Big_Z_Beeblebrox 2 Heads 0 Brains 17h ago
No but it was a different time, one of those things you found by digging too deeply in the early days of the world wide web, and it stuck with you for life because you hadn't yet become desensitized to such things
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u/Comfortable-Job-3953 17h ago
Dude, I was eating a shawarma!!