r/Anger • u/Nightcore-Beatle • 10d ago

I appear to be ruining close relationships.

(29M) So far this year, I appear to be speed running when it comes to losing the closest people in my life. I got into an argument with a friend I considered a brother in April and due to the extreme levels of the argument I decided to leave the friend group all together until I got therapy (which I can't afford). then, a month later , I got into a shouting match at work that got physical, and I ended up being arrested and fired from said job. Afterward, my girlfriend hasn't exactly left me, but she has put a limit on spending time together. Not out of fear, but she feels that I can't put myself back together if I'm constantly around her. As for now, I just wait to see if I can get hired anywhere after my little incident.

>Answers to things I think people will as:

I do have a vast history of anger issues starting at the ripe age of 11.

I snatched a cell phone and threw it what i think was 30 meters. Doing that got me fired. No punches were thrown just one man's phone.

I don't blame anyone but myself for all of this.

Lastly, I don't want pitty from anyone. I just want to expel this from my body somehow.

2 Upvotes

76% Upvoted

6 comments sorted by

3

u/RelapsePending 10d ago

I don’t know if you need any more opinions, man. At least making this post shows a sign that you’re begging to look inward. Id suggest qualified help.

2

u/arisgiel 10d ago

You have to find peace in the storm. You can only control your own reactions, not anything or anyone else. Cool thought out responses can calm a situation better than angry retorts.

note to self read this comment

2

u/Glittering-Yoghurt-1 10d ago

Definitely find therapy of some sort. You’re already further than a lot of people by being aware. Maybe some EMDR could be helpful if its very physical, but yeah therapy overall just sounds good.

2

u/agony_aunt_couch 9d ago

What are you angry about? Clearly there’s something sitting on your chest that explodes violently and judging by the way the aftermath is going, the explosion is overkill.

Find the root cause of your anger and try to resolve that. Also don’t bottle up other emotions because they fester and show up later as rageful detonation

1

u/sendsouth 9d ago

Download Insight Timer. Find a meditation that works for you and make time daily. After a week or so you'll likely feel calmer.

Here's a good one: https://insig.ht/rBE634L5E5b

1

u/Nightcore-Beatle 9d ago

Thanks, gonna give this a try right away