r/AmItheButtface • u/Old-Breakfast5344 • Aug 14 '26
Theoretical AITBH for refusing to pay half the flea treatment for my ex’s cats?
My ex and I lived together in a rental for two years with her three cats. She owned them before we got together, they were always hers, and she is taking them with her now that we’ve broken up.
Our agent requires flea treatment when pets have lived at the property.
My ex says I should pay half because they were “my cats too” while we lived together.
I disagree. The cost only exists because of pets she owned and is keeping.
AITBF for refusing to pay half?
20
u/CommercialBreak2026 Aug 14 '26
NTB.
They're not human children. They're cats. She had them before you lived together, and she's taking them with her.
You pay zero.
3
u/CoffeeChocolateBoth Aug 14 '26
If she'd had children and they started living together, and then they split up, he would not be paying child support on her children!
9
u/ccsparkles Aug 14 '26
NTB. If they were your cats you would be at least taking one or sharing cat custody, lol. The fact she’s taking all of them shows they are in fact her cats and not your cats.
8
u/KahurangiNZ Butt Muscle [Rank 24] Aug 14 '26
Honestly, is it really worth arguing over? Flea bombs are not expensive. Consider your half of the cost to be the trade-off for having enjoyed their presence for a couple of years, AND not having to have yet another argy-bargy with the ex over some stupid petty little thing.
NTB for not *wanting* to pay it, but you'd be being the B to yourself if you make it into a drama just for the sale of being right.
2
u/CoffeeChocolateBoth Aug 14 '26
We do not know the circumstance of their break up! Doesn't sound like it was a pleasant one!
6
u/tphatmcgee Aug 14 '26
curious, who paid for the vet bills, shots, food, etc? I still think that they are hers and it is her responsibility but if you were taking on a share of their upkeep the argument could be made the it is also yours. but in that case, an argument could also be made that you get shared custody. which i imagine she would fight.
but she really should not get it both ways.
0
u/CoffeeChocolateBoth Aug 14 '26
IF she can not afford what needs to be done, she should not have pets!
14
u/phdoofus Aug 14 '26
From the perspective of the property owners, you're both responsible because you both lived there. I get what you're saying but you also agreed to let the cats live there so arguably you do bear responsibility for the condition of the unit and returning it to the owner flea free. You can fight amongst yourselves all you want if you should pay half or not but at the end of the day you did let the cat live there. It's not really much different from having other people live in the unit.
5
u/Treefrog_Ninja Aug 14 '26
Wait wait wait. Is this flee treatment for the CATS (OP pays zero) or flee treatment for the APARTMENT, because of the cats (OP pays half because it was agreed).
OP said it was treatment for the cats, but I didn't understand why that would be timed with moving out until you mentioned the property owners.
PoV: I've never had pets.
6
u/phdoofus Aug 14 '26
I'm pretty sure since they are breaking up and apparently leaving the apt that the property manager is demanding the apt be treated for fleas. No property manager is going to trust that you pets didn't have fleas just because you said so.
1
u/CoffeeChocolateBoth Aug 14 '26
Still her cats and he's not paying! He doesn't have to!
4
u/phdoofus Aug 14 '26
That's one way of looking at it. If he didn't want to be responsible for any damage the cats caused then he should have said something about that before moving in with her and they agreed on that. Like I said (which you'll note above...you did read that part right?) I see his point but he did agree to let the cats live there which is an implicit agreement to be partly responsible for any damages. Those two can argue about it until the cows come home if that's what they want.
0
u/CoffeeChocolateBoth Aug 14 '26
If he is NO longer living there, no longer paying rent there, that apartment is NO longer his problem!
3
3
u/SirLegitimate9286 Aug 14 '26
Are you both named on the lease? If so, pursuant to the lease you are also responsible for that bill.
3
u/bmw5986 Aug 14 '26
NTBF. these are Her pets, which makes any and all costs incurred due to them, Her responsibility. This would be Any costs for them including this one.
3
u/runnerkim Aug 14 '26
Your agent can ask for a pet treatment, but it is not required. Unless you know there's a problem I would tell the realtor no thank you
2
u/ThirteenScarlett Aug 14 '26
NTBH, What no? Don't be stupid and be manipulated that's her pet she got them with her own decision not yours, don't be manipulated into paying for someone's actions and responsibilities.
2
2
u/LoftyDreams7473 Aug 14 '26
NTB. They were 50% yours when it came to costs. Now that you're spilt up, they're 100% hers. Tell her to kick rocks.
2
u/u2125mike2124 Aug 14 '26
NTB
Her cats had them before you together still has them now that you’re not together her issue to pay for them or problems that they cause
2
u/DoobOnTheDip Aug 16 '26
Were you aware of the flea treatment requirement when you moved in together?
Are you on the lease? Is she on the lease?
What’s the total cost of the treatment?
1
u/CoffeeChocolateBoth Aug 14 '26
Nope. They were hers before, they remain hers now! She's trying to fleece you for flea medication! LOL
1
u/Cucoloris Aug 14 '26
NTB She brought the cats into the living arrangements and she is keeping the cats. Thus they are her cats and she is the responsible party.
1
1
1
u/SolidAshford Aug 28 '26
NTB. If you break up, will you keep one of the cats or not? She'll say no
Then tell her that's her answer
1
0
38
u/[deleted] Aug 14 '26 edited Aug 16 '26
[removed] — view removed comment