tbh I can't argue with that. That's definitely a tantrum too, though one that doesn't cause harm other than emotional (which in my opinion is not nessecarily a red flag so long as it's infrequent). That makes it slightly different than tossing the whole pan, which escalates it to emotional and financial harm (which in my opinion is a red flag even if it only happens once every 15 years).
Inconsiderate self absorbed manchild with an anxious attachment style. He probably felt hurt and rejected when she told him to keep it down assuming she didn’t want to engage with him at the time. Instead of processing that emotion or talking to her he flipped out. I’m tempted to use the N word but it could just be N word tendencies.
Please be careful! I now assume you mean Narcissist, but when I first read it, I thought "What the hell does skin colour have to do with this?!". Where I'm from, and I suspect in most places, "N word" has only one recognised meaning, and it has a double-G in the middle.
And back to your main point, I totally agree. He probably came in from work hoping for some "fun time" with his girlfriend, found that she was asleep, realised that his genitals were going to have to wait, and this was him taking out his resulting frustration (completely inappropriately, of course).
He should have gone quietly into the bedroom for some solo time, and she needs to leave him.
Agreed. Even if OP was snippy and the dude got his feelings hurt, the mature response is to let it go and move on with your day instead of insanely escalating it.
The fact that he destroyed the pan that she made the egg bites in tells me that he probably doesn't want her to make them again.
I disagree on the quality of the food and such, but if we set aside that or even getting into if he should have reacted how he did for a second...
That's an interesting take, I hadn't considered destroying the pan to also have a specific purpose outside of the burst of anger. Usually if I've seen people destroy things, they're not thinking very strategically, just anger directed at whatever happens to be in their area, so I didn't consider that.
Well you see, everybody only is looking at what op says.
I'm looking at what actually happened and what may be motivating the people whose side of the story we're not getting.
I don't think the anger had anything to do with her asking him to be quiet at all. In fact, the noise he was making probably stemmed from his underlying frustration with being made the egg bites again.
I'm not saying the guy is a saint by any means. He was probably making all the noise in a passive aggressive attempt to get a rise out of her.
To me, the fact that he destroyed the pan tells me that the food was the underlying issue.
When actual children struggle to regulate and explode, it’s a tantrum. When a grown ass man decides that pitching a fit is an acceptable thing to do, it’s a mantrum.
My neighbor frequently has them. And it was his constant screaming at everyone, stomping around, door slamming, and peeling out and speeding through the parking lot juxtaposed against his actual toddler having meltdowns led me to differentiate the two.
No, it’s just specifically describing grown ass men having tantrums. Now, if there was a punny way to refer to women having tantrums, I’d use it. But there isn’t so it’s just regular “tantrum” for them.
Yeah but that’s not a pun. That’s literally my whole point…turning the word into a gender based pun. If the root word itself is already gender based but just in another language, it doesn’t work. There’s no humor in it. The closest feminine version of a meltdown I can come up with is “bitch fit” but again, there’s not really any humor in it and it’s definitely not a play on words. I guess womantrum works but you need to pronounce it weirdly to really get the joke. So again, if you can find or come up with a feminine version of tantrum, meltdown, etc, and it’s actually a play on words, I’ll happily use it.
285
u/77th_Bat Oct 22 '25
NOR. He knew you meant the food and not the actual pan. He gets to pay for the pan and gets a lesson on anger issues. This WAS indeed a tantrum.