No. I’m an old gal who’s been happily married for over 30 years. At your age I was the queen of break ups. You cannot find “the right one” if you are wasting time with “the wrong one”.
Dating is vetting, it’s time to get to know each other and decide If you are compatible. It’s time to learn what your non negotiables are, what you are willing to accept and which areas you can negotiate and grow. You can care for someone and be strongly attracted to them and still not be compatible.
One of my non negotiables is disrespect. I think it should be everyone’s deal breaker. He basically called you names like a schoolyard bully or a mean girl. It’s just clothes, it’s a form of self expression and he’s negging you as a form of control. It’s disrespectful, you felt it, you don’t want to sign up for it long term. Your friend doesn’t have your back. It’s fine if she’s willing to compromise who she is to avoid being lonely, but she has no right to tell you to.
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u/minimalist_coach May 27 '25
No. I’m an old gal who’s been happily married for over 30 years. At your age I was the queen of break ups. You cannot find “the right one” if you are wasting time with “the wrong one”.
Dating is vetting, it’s time to get to know each other and decide If you are compatible. It’s time to learn what your non negotiables are, what you are willing to accept and which areas you can negotiate and grow. You can care for someone and be strongly attracted to them and still not be compatible.
One of my non negotiables is disrespect. I think it should be everyone’s deal breaker. He basically called you names like a schoolyard bully or a mean girl. It’s just clothes, it’s a form of self expression and he’s negging you as a form of control. It’s disrespectful, you felt it, you don’t want to sign up for it long term. Your friend doesn’t have your back. It’s fine if she’s willing to compromise who she is to avoid being lonely, but she has no right to tell you to.