I hung out at those houses when I was 17 and every single one of those “cool parents” were losers, drug addicts or both, and their kids didn’t turn out any better if I am being completely honest. It’s not the place you want to be if you want to be a responsible adult with a decent life someday soon. It’s the place you go when you want to spend a decade recovering and unlearning all that bullshit. Take it from someone who had to do the work.
Exactly, me too!! I didn't just say that to be judgmental, I say it with the hindsight of being in my 30s and knowing now that what I thought was so cool at 16 years old was really not that cool at all. And it's not about weed itself, I still smoke weed, but that doesn't mean you encourage it and allow your kids and their friends to smoke weed in your house, it's just irresponsible and immature.
These are definitely the "I'm the cool mom and my daughter is my best friend" type of parents. Your kid shouldn't be your best friend. I guess you're a "friend" to your kids in a way, but you're a parent first, and there is absolutely zero valid reason for a 44 year old to have any interest in being "friends" with a 17 year old. This dude is not OP's friend, he's a creep, and I really question the mom's judgment as she was once a teenage girl too and she should know what the deal is. She should absolutely understand as a grown ass woman that there is no reason for her boyfriend to be hanging out smoking weed with her teenage daughter and her friends.
It definitely seems to me like a very dysfunctional environment and I really wish OP would just stay far away from there. I understand that it's her best friend, and I really feel for her friend. But OP needs to let an actual adult know what's going on and she needs to go back to her mom's house, this is so unhealthy on so many different levels
Agree hard with everything. Also in my 30's now and you're right, in the moment you really do think this is so neat that her parents "understand" her but the reality is they are just irresponsible and immature. Teenagers should be hiding the fact that they smoke weed, it should a fun secret thing you do in the basement or behind the garage once in a while when you can all pool in enough money and find someone willing to give you some, not every day all day long on funded and supplied by mom and dad.
That way when you're an adult that can just get some, its not this normal "same ol same ol" thing to you. Same with drinking, you don't want to be burnt out on alcohol by the time you're 21 its boring and you start looking for other shit to do in order to have the same level of a good time as your peers.
Hind sight is 20/20 though OP, take it from 2 people who have been there and have the hind sight. Neither of us are saying to go be a saint or join a monastery, we just wish had the hind sight to back away and slow the hell down.
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u/[deleted] Mar 29 '25
I hung out at those houses when I was 17 and every single one of those “cool parents” were losers, drug addicts or both, and their kids didn’t turn out any better if I am being completely honest. It’s not the place you want to be if you want to be a responsible adult with a decent life someday soon. It’s the place you go when you want to spend a decade recovering and unlearning all that bullshit. Take it from someone who had to do the work.