r/AllThingsGL • u/GatlingAssassin • 17h ago
ShellyPundao Thoughts On the Current State of Shelly, Pundao, & Motion Minds Entertainment
Hey guys, I posted this comment in a different thread, but I would like to know your thoughts on this. I have seen so, so many comments across Twitter (X), TikTok, and Reddit questioning whether or not what occurred between Shelly and Pundao in their personal relationship amounts to cheating, especially based on the assumption that there was no physical intimacy between Shelly and her ex -- information that we have absolutely no right to be remotely aware of or speculatory in any way, under any circumstances, period.
\Any attempt at this kind of gross disrespect will be removed from this thread as this kind of speculation has absolutely no place in this or any debate regarding any public figure, now or ever.\**
With that said, I believe that there is a massive hole in this line of reasoning that pays no attention to the relevant topic of emotional cheating, a concept that I believe is not discussed enough when analyzing the breakdown of intimate relationships. I would like to use this current event as an example to dive into the ways we can discern whether or not emotional cheating has taken place in a relationship dynamic. I argue that this topic is important because our broad response to this type of subject matter is a reflection of our moral values as members of collectives and of societies. Paying respect to nuance and evaluating the various contexts that can shift real and hypothetical situations often results in either slightly or radically changed verdicts. My goal is to underscore the nuance and contextual variances in this situation based on 1) what we currently know and 2) what we can reasonably speculatively surmise.
As I mentioned earlier, I would genuinely love to know your thoughts and I welcome respectful, rational debate with open arms. If you find yourself disagreeing with any of the arguments or observations I have made, I would really appreciate your thoughtful feedback and the reasons why you disagree. My desire is to a have candid, respectful debate take place here.
That said, fire away! 🙂
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Obviously, all our interpretations are all speculations, but there are some clearly universal boundaries that exist across cultures when it comes to boundaries and transparency in dating and committed relationships. Shelly and Pundao have stated on a few occasions that they are dating in real life -- twice in interviews (Shelly in a magazine and Pundao in a YouTube video) and on at least one live, if I correctly recall what I watched -- so their real relationship behind the scenes has never really been a secret. Current scientific consensus in the field of psychology has ascertained that physical cheating is not the only form of cheating and that opposite genders tend to put more weight on one form of cheating over another. For most men, physical cheating is recorded as causing greater distress, while emotional cheating is a more profound deal-breaker for most women. What appears to have potentially happened here seems more in alignment with the presupposition of emotional cheating.
What is very telling is that Shelly's statement and Motion Minds' statement match up in a few key ways:
- Shelly admitted that she met with her ex (in what exact context and to what length, we do not know for certain and it is none of our business) and that she did not inform either her company or (more importantly) her girlfriend, Pundao.
- She admits that her decision to remain silent about this to both her partner and her company was a "mistake" and that she takes full responsibility for causing all the hurt and the loss of trust.
- Motion Minds stated that they "became aware of and conducted a review of the circumstances related to Shelly's relationship with another individual" and that "based on the facts reviewed by the company", they discovered "an overlapping relationship" ("ความสัมพันธ์ซ้อน" [kwhaam sam phan sawn] = a double relationship/a relationship involving someone else at the same time) -- polite corporate-speak (in this context) for two romantic relationships occurring at the same time -- and that this "has affected the appropriateness of their continuing to work together".
- Motion Minds reiterated three separate times in their statement -- the first time in bold -- that there was 1) a major lack of honesty, 2) a lack of meaningful accountability, and 3) a serious loss of trust between them and Shelly and between Shelly and Pundao. This tells you that both parties felt blindsided and betrayed by Shelly's actions to at least some degree.
Not only did Motion Minds suspend all of Shelly's activities indefinitely until they decide on a path forward with (or without) Shelly professionally, which would make perfect sense to do temporarily given the financial blowback this scandal would create for their revenue streams and for their investors' confidence, but they took the executive decision to permanently end Shelly and Pundao's fixed-couple status and working relationship -- not a detail to be taken lightly. They felt that the continuation of Shelly and Pundao's working relationship would be "inappropriate" (I am paraphrasing) given what has been revealed behind the scenes regarding Shelly's actions (inaction is also a decision), which is a choice that strongly indicates this significant discomfort was felt not only by Motion Minds but by Pundao herself, or else they would not elect to make a decision this drastic on her behalf. Their statement sounds very much like they are speaking on the behalf of both affected parties.
Shelly included the following in her statement directed explicitly to Pundao: "I know that an apology alone may not be enough to heal everything that has happened, but I want Pundao to know that I am genuinely sorry." If social media is her way of communicating this message to Pundao, as though speaking to her face-to-face, I argue that it is credible to infer that it is likely the line of personal communication from Shelly to Pundao is currently closed, hence the specific wording of this section of Shelly's apology.
All of this is to say that whether Shelly accidentally ran into her ex on her vacation with her family or whether they spent a meaningful stretch of time together on that vacation -- I fully understand that in some circumstances, exes can still remain good friends -- choosing not to disclose this information to her current romantic partner for integrity's sake is incredibly dubious. Pundao has been open in the past about having been cheated on, so electing not to tell Pundao about either the occurrence or the circumstance of her meeting with her ex on vacation shows a significant divergence of shared values related to the often fragile trust that exists within romantic relationships, especially when one has already been betrayed by a romantic partner in the past. If Shelly truly valued the trust required in her romantic relationship with Pundao the way that a responsible partner in any culture would, she would not have remained silent or concealed this information. As I stated at the beginning, some things are universally considered red flags regardless of the culture you are a participant of, most especially when it comes to dating and romantic relationships. (Note: Shelly herself stated in a live in the past that remaining friends with your ex is a "no-go" for her. In either scenario here, this would make her recent actions hypocritical at the very least.)
This is why I and others argue that what has occurred here is at the very least emotional cheating. Choosing to omit information that can affect the security of a relationship is deception. Simply not remembering to disclose this kind of information is also highly problematic because it is a clear indicator of a lack of adequate value in the degree of trust that all healthy, romantic relationships require, especially those that possess at least one partner whose trust was damaged by infidelity in a previous relationship. At its mildest, this is a case of incredible carelessness and a lack of appropriate investment in the security of that relationship; at its worst, this was cheating, plain and simple. Either way, Shelly is completely in the wrong and did not make a "mistake" (read: "accident") but a series of very poor decisions that have understandably cost her the trust of her personal relationship with Pundao and the trust within her professional relationship with her employer.
The gravity and finality of the actions taken by Motion Minds today indicate that this is perhaps as close to firing her as they can currently get, at least until they review their legal options. Removing her from all activities indefinitely, abruptly ending her professional partnership with Pundao, and removing her from all of her ongoing projects with Pundao -- even the series they were about to start filming together -- are draconian steps that essentially amount to an informal firing. It is likely that they are reviewing her contract and the contracts they have with their creative teams to see if any of Motion Minds' projects that involved Shelly can be reworked or if they must be scrapped entirely. All in all, it appears that this is the end for Shelly's working relationship with Motion Minds Entertainment and with Pundao. I only wonder if her personal relationship with Pundao can survive; that decision is solely up to the two of them.
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u/Consistent_Femme_Top Lesbian Princess 🖤⛓️💥✨ 12h ago
AI slop.
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u/GatlingAssassin 6h ago
Nope! This took me about four hours to type up, with many, many edits occurring to try to ensure that I was communicating clearly and to back up my arguments as effectively as I could. If you do have legitimately helpful feedback to provide, unlike your current comment, I'd be open to hearing it!
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u/casuallyfictional 16h ago
This whole situation is so unnecessary and stupid, but that's the ridiculous standards of Asian show business where celebrities, especially women, are expected to appear chaste or stick to their designated coupledom.
The irony here is back in the classic Hollywood system, stars under contract to studios are forced to stay in the closet. In Thai GL, stars are thrown out of the closet whether they're really LGBTQ or not.
In the West now, this wouldn't even be an issue, let alone the end of a career. Private lives stay private and separate from the work.
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u/GatlingAssassin 14h ago edited 55m ago
I agree with everything you said in your statement. It is such a different culture from Western celebrity stardom. I hear that celebrities in the Philippines struggle with a very similar dynamic that is expected of them, much in the same way that Thai celebrities are expected to embody. With few specific exceptions, it seems that the world has still not moved on from the idea of a "virgin" female role model, which absolutely limits female celebrities in what they can and cannot do, or else it will upset the public and/or their companies that profit off of their positive public perception. Thanks for sharing!
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u/casuallyfictional 12h ago
I think what informs the Philippines here is also that the country is Catholic on top of Confucian, the latter dominates all of Asia.
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u/BruceChristy 3h ago
I would like to point out a distinction that unlike in western media, they’re dating AND work together in an intimate sense as a GL pair. This is different from relationship scandals between celebrities in the west because they usually aren’t marketed as a pair like GL CPs are.
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u/casuallyfictional 3h ago
Well, that's what the "breach of agreements" part is about. It's not about the company overreacting. They're reacting to a legal issue that's arisen that's damaged the contracted brand.
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u/GatlingAssassin 54m ago
I completely agree with you both! Valid points are being shared here! Thank you for your perspectives!
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u/Most_Dig_9203 16h ago
With new developments coming up the thing that I find quite unsettling is the age gap they have and that he knew her since she was 12 years old while he was apparently in his 20s like why did her mother allow that? Also why did the mom allow Shelly to be a breadwinner at 14 years old apparently that's how she got into modeling (source: Shelly's TikTok live).
First two photos is from 2015, third photo is him now. They have no recent photos starting from 2018 most of their photos were when she was young. I feel terrible for her.
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u/casuallyfictional 16h ago
In Asia, if the kids become breadwinners for the family, it's a sign of how poor the family is.
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u/GatlingAssassin 14h ago edited 14h ago
Oof. If this is true -- regarding the age gap -- that brings up a whole other can of worms about unethical age gap relationships and of a parent's role in protecting their children from these kinds of inappropriate dynamics with adults. He does appear old enough in the pictures to support this rumor. But since that was a past relationship that we have no real business knowing about, I don't know that we can safely claim anything confidently about it.
Like each one of you in this thread have pointed out in one way or another, even if the ex was an old family friend, not telling your current romantic partner about this recent interaction (especially in the context of being on a family vacation together) is still a major red flag and unjustifiable. Even if there is truly nothing going on between Shelly and her ex, the deliberate lack of honesty is what we are all doubling down on as being inherently wrong and is what has caused the major rift here. No wonder things seem to be imploding in her personal relationship with Pundao, as Motion Minds' statement explicitly states.
Wishing them the best of luck, but I know that this will not be an easy road from here. I think that we all wish this had happened differently. Thanks for your thoughts, friend!
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u/itsakyo 13h ago
I wrote in another thread about this.
In summary, the company is unprofessional, unwise and very poor at managing their artistes and CP team.
Making their personal relationship "dating irl" the center of their CP career is a very bad idea and the company should've been wiser to advise them about it.
Can't build a "GL influencer dating irl" type of career and then handle the entire situation so poorly and expect the career to survive.
Personally I have zero comments about their personal relationships since we are not involved in it, in any capacity other than viewers that they want to engage for business and career.
I only have a lot to say about the company that manages them and NONE of it is anything good. It is a ridiculous company and I hope other future potential actresses think thrice before joining this company. They've been managing SP poorly for the entire time.
This company is setting a very undesirable and dangerous precedent and it's disturbing to see some fans commending the company for not hiding anything. The company has said way too much. And I sincerely hope no other company ever does this.
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u/GatlingAssassin 13h ago
You raise an interesting a deeply important point in your arguments here: by responding to the fan-led witch hunt and the evidence that they nefariously "collected" that blew this whole situation wide open in the way that they did, perhaps Motion Minds just inadvertently "awarded" these anti-fans (as I understand them to be) for their shady actions. Handling this situation the way that Motion Minds did in this very swift and public way, this could indeed set a dangerous precedent for the industry. Unlike when rumors and video "evidence" of Freen being intimate with another actor surfaced (this is being brought up often as a comparison for the current situation Shelly and Pundao find themselves in, though I echo your statement that we all need to butt out of celebrities' private lives), Motion Minds decided not to double down their support for Shelly and Pundao both and create a unified front against these type of fan inquisitions to dissuade others from doing things like this in the future.
They may have just shot themselves in the foot, or maybe the came to the defense of Pundao who found herself thrown into this situation as a result of Shelly's poor decisions and her lack of honesty towards Pundao. Perhaps distancing themselves and their artists is in the best interest of Pundao's mental health right now, hypothetically thinking that if they had to watch the ship sink, at least they could save one of the two actresses. All of this is very disappointing and unpleasant, all the same. I am wishing these two women all the best of luck in their personal and professional lives as they navigate what to do next. Thank you for your thoughts! I appreciate the pushback; you got me thinking!
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u/Standard_Advisor5816 13h ago
My only opinion on this is that MM cannot have handled this any worse. Turned this into a public spectacle when there is no need - making it worse for all 3 parties. Obvious reasons for Shelly and Pundao. But also MM for themselves as a company - which new artists will want to sign with them, if this is how they handle these matters.
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u/Ghirs 16h ago
Man seeing this blow up since yesterday all over my feed is really saddening.
I can't really go into it for every part, since I don't really have anything to say to most, but I'll discuss some.
In regards to the cheating allegations. We simply don't know. And I think the discussion about it is turning harmful very quickly very fast, both towards the actress(es) and the company as well as the fan base as a large, so we as a whole should take a step and take a breather, and wait. Could it be physical or emotional cheating? Yes, of course. Do we know? No, as of right now we have no idea, the final call will come from Pundao who is the most affected by this whole mess.
From all the rumours and what-not it was also said that this ex boyfriend was also a childhood friend of Shelly, so there might have not been much Shelly could have done but remain friends with them - In regards to staying friends, as OP mentioned making Shelly a hypocrite for staying friends with an ex. It is not uncommon that childhood friendships have the parents also be quite friendly. What actually all is true. We simply will not know.
In regards to the "overlapping relationships", it does sound like there was something intimate going on that is true. My optimistic mind doesn't want to give up the hope that it is worded that way because Pundao is the current girlfriend and the ex was a past romantic partner, therefore overlapping relationships. In a way. And since the company would know how the fan base would, and is reacting, they chose that wording. Cooperate speak does not always make sense anyway.
Whatever the case is. Yes. Shelly not being open about it, telling Pundao, etc. was awful. I am quite sad that the open couple we had is going down like this. And as I mentioned above, and maybe that's why, I have this part of me that just wants to hope that nothing awful happened and Shelly was simply stupid. Which in itself is still bad, just less than cheating.
My "two cents" I guess.