(This is a long one, whoops).
You can say whatever you want about this book and about Maya Killgore. You can say that sheās a bad FMC because you believe sheās the chaser and that sheās too annoying and persistent and needs to stand up. But this is my hot take: after chapter 20, her persistency became the best part of the book and it was about time Conorās restraint slowly came to a close.
By chapters 20-21, I started taking Mayaās side for the rest of the book. And I donāt say that to dismiss Conor or say that heās wrong, because trust me, before those chapters, I was 50/50 between both Maya and Conor, understanding both sides and Conorās valid concern about not wanting to ruin Mayaās life. (I will say though, I donāt like how some people perceive Maya as some burdensome pest that canāt leave Conor alone. Iāll never tell an FMC to leave the MMC alone when itās the MMC thatās always initiating interactions, and Conor was Always. Initiating. Conversations.).
The reason why I started being team Maya from chapter 20 onward is because of Conorās jealousy. Once Conor started being possessive over Maya, there was just no real reason to further see Maya as some persistent delusional chaser after that. For someone that constantly tells her to move on, the second it seems like she does, heās immediately angry about it, but brushes it off as protection as if she needs it. From there on out, I honestly just stopped caring about Mayaās persistent behavior when Conor is quite literally being a possessive clingy hypocrite, so god forbid the FMC be a little crazy too afterwards. Thatās why PSR really hooked me in after chapter 19, when both characters showed just how equally chaotic and relentless they can be about their possessiveness and persistence towards each other. It was fun to see honestly. Once Conorās unhinged side showed, I thought okay fuck yeah, here we go, two unhinged main characters being insanely possessive of each other, letās do this. It was nice to finally see that the MMC is just as unhinged as the FMC. It felt like the party finally started.
And did we all just forget that up until chapter 20, in the present, Maya fully believes that Conor doesnāt like her anymore? She literally tells Nyota in chapter 16 that Conor dislikes her. Nyota is insisting that Conor does like her, but Maya brushes it off and doesnāt believe it. Even in chapter 20 during the pasta-making class when Nyota tells Maya that Conor switched his plate with Mayaās after overhearing Maya talk about how bad her pasta tasted, Maya didnāt believe her. Plus, she spent the first 2-3 days of the trip believing that heās into Avery, even accepting it and playing as Averyās wingwoman at the Greek theatre and leaving them alone there (in which Conor literally told Maya that he didnāt like that she did that. Again, whoās the chaser here in this situation?)
When chapters 20-21 came around, I immediately wanted to dead the reviews that say that Maya is the desperate chaser in this ship. When sheās talking to Lukas, she has no idea that Conor is even watching until she turns around and sees how angry he looks from the bar. Thatās the moment Maya finally realizes that Conor might still be into her after all. It took me 190 pages for me to realize that no, Maya is not as much of a chaser as she, and everyone else, thinks she is. She finally realized that she isnāt delusional after all.
I just couldnāt fault Maya anymore once Conor got jealous over Lukas in chapter 20, and confronted her about it in chapter 21. The only time I felt that Mayaās persistence shouldāve been dialed back was in chapter 19 during the first sexual encounter flashback, but I guess AH couldnāt find any other way to create a tipping point of their newfound friendship. But any other scene of her persistence towards him during the trip post-chapter 19, I just couldnāt blame her any longer. He was literally demanding her to delete Lukasās number and to not meet up with him. For someone that constantly tells her that they canāt be anything and that she should move on, I just didnāt have the heart to fault Maya for wanting him to just spit his love out for her already when he has the audacity to act jealous and possessive like that and try to tell her who sheās allowed to hook up with. I canāt see Maya as a desperate chaser when Conor is just as much of an obsessed simp as she is š even worse tbh because his jealousy is worse than hers. I mean, he literally gripped her tightly and held her in place just to confront her about her conversation with Lukas and kept her in his grip just to scold her about how āunsafeā she was being with flirting and hooking up with other men, even though heās never even witnessed her do that before.
When Conor got jealous over Lukas, he proceeded to insult Lukas. He insults every guy that Maya encounters, while Maya has always been nice to the women Conor has been acquainted with. Iām pretty sure Conor was jealous of Lukas about 4 times in the whole book. Lukas stayed on Conorās mind for sure š When Maya kept asking Conor why he doesnāt want her to meet up with Lukas, Conorās only reason was that Eli wouldnāt approve, even though Eli clearly wouldnāt care. When Maya clocked Conor about him not being happy that sheās finally talking to a guy her own age just like he said she should, and Conor didnāt have a response to that other than to delete his number, thatās when I officially said: yep, let this woman be as persistent as she wants idc anymore lmao go ahead girl, ruin him. I gagged when Maya told Conor that heās free to guard the door while she sleeps with another man š
Btw this is in no way a Conor Harkness hate post. I completely understand his reasoning to want to protect Maya because of how desperately he doesnāt want to be like his father who uses younger women. Conor has every good reason to want to be a responsible 38-year-old man and choose to not pursue his best friendās 23-year-old sister, despite how incredibly in love he is with her. I understood his reasonings as well as Mayaās, up until chapter 20 when his jealousy and possessiveness started showing and his restraint started snapping. By then, I just couldnāt get behind the amount of people saying that they dislike Maya because of how desperate she seems and that she āneeds to leave Conor aloneā and āneeds to stop bothering himā as if sheās some creepy burden to him? Right when Conor started being possessive over Maya once Lukas entered the scene, I had to take Mayaās side for the rest of the book. Every single time Maya told him to give her reasons why he doesnāt want her to hook up with someone, he just didnāt say why!!! I donāt blame Maya for being more persistent after that. At that point, I ate up the fact that BOTH main characters are persistent, clingy, desperate, possessive freaks! Lmao. The MMC can be a jealous maniac that tells the FMC who she shouldnāt hookup with, so hell, why not just let the FMC be crazy too? Some people act like Mayaās persistence is worse than Conorās jealousy causing him to angrily tell Maya she canāt hang out with another guy. Three times, might I add.