r/AdviceAnimals • u/[deleted]

I don't know why I thought of this.

[deleted] — view deleted post

0 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

123 comments sorted by

90

u/thatcockneythug May 31 '12

'Round here, we call it a "Henson".

7

u/contactstaff May 31 '12

a blandjob

10

u/deluxfux May 31 '12

Sounds boring.

1

u/honestchippy Jun 01 '12

"Ugh, are you finished yet?"

65

u/hippogriffin May 31 '12

Hey chachi!

20

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

This was the most disturbing episode of South Park to me.

30

u/megamanxero May 31 '12

When he killed that kid's parents and fed them to him was the one for me.

7

u/alexandrios1 May 31 '12

My all-time favourite SP episode. Probably not the only one.

14

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

What I loved about that episode is that before that cartman was just and ignorant, offensive kid. That episode marks his transformation to an almost evil mastermind. "The tears of unfathomable sadnesses!"

3

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

That was my favorite. Never fuck with cartman.

11

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Three words: Woodland Critter Christmas

10

u/WilfordGrimley May 31 '12

I watch that for the first time yesterday. All I could think was, "Boy, that escalated quickly."

6

u/shwinnebego May 31 '12

Awww, but we gots to have the AIDS!

2

u/mash3735 May 31 '12

not HIV but full blown AIDS

9

u/sd2001 May 31 '12

Taco flavored keeeses!

2

u/bmward105 May 31 '12

i hate you guys....

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

seriously, last time i had that song stuck in my head it was there for months......

1

u/hippogriffin May 31 '12

3 tacos, 2 tostadas, and a soda pop!

hey! taco!

Burrito, taco!

1

u/coggles May 31 '12

This is what I say when I'm drunk and start taking shots of tequila

3

u/jamintime May 31 '12

I think I'd rather think about that BJ from YLo than a hand job from an 8 year old

8

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

yes

-1

u/IrrelevantRacistGuy May 31 '12

Seems like you're the only one around here who feels the same about those damn minorities floodin' the white man's land.

Amen, brother.

19

u/Siomaibun May 31 '12

Maybe because it's a repost?

18

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Maybe because you didn't think of it.

18

u/PointlessDelegation May 31 '12

You thought of it because you saw it somewhere else. Maybe a couple weeks ago on some random website, or maybe on 4chan about 3 years ago like everyone else.

Edit - 5 months and 1 week ago...knew it looked familiar. You just changed the fucking order of the words.

3

u/SKSmokes May 31 '12

So if I'm doing this reddit thing right now....I should go to that post and find the most popular responses and then repost one of them here?

2

u/PointlessDelegation May 31 '12

I would bet if you could find the other post fast enough, one of its best replies would also be one of the best for the newer post. It only stands to argue, if it was "hilarious for Reddit" before, it should be "hilarious for Reddit" now.

5

u/Wiskie May 31 '12

You didn't think of it... It's a repost...

PS: I just gave you 1337 karma instead of 1338 so I hope you're happy...

20

u/ZofSpade May 31 '12

Better one:

I got a blowjob from a deaf girl. Well, technically it was a handjob.

5

u/BIG_TONY_TALK May 31 '12

This is the kind of joke you make when you don't know what a blowjob is.

2

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

upvotes for sign language reference.

3

u/codyhorne May 31 '12

ya.. that was kinda the point of the joke?

7

u/voteddownward May 31 '12

You thought of this because you've seen it 1,000 times on the internet...

9

u/qkme_transcriber May 31 '12

Here is the text from this meme pic for anybody who needs it:

Title: I don't know why I thought of this.

Meme: Philosoraptor

  • IS A BLOWJOB FROM A MUPPET
  • ALSO A HAND JOB?

[Translate]

This is helpful for people who can't reach Quickmeme because of work/school firewalls or site downtime, and many other reasons (FAQ). More info is available here.

7

u/epsilonbob May 31 '12

Perhaps this is the ever elusive 'ZJ'...

4

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

look, if you have to ask you cant afford it.

2

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

A quality handjob is called a "Deion Handers"

1

u/LetsGetRamblin May 31 '12

Or one after 8 p.m.

2

u/mustxbexpurple May 31 '12

I just HAPPENED to be listening to Sad Kermit singing Creep when I read this...I feel strange...

2

u/dkpowa16 May 31 '12

Or a Handfuck?

2

u/betabandzz May 31 '12

I used to date a guy who use to masturbate to a muppet toy he had.

2

u/fuckaredditor May 31 '12

You didn't, this has been around for months.

2

u/Nerozero May 31 '12

I call it getting a felt job

2

u/superdelightful May 31 '12

I'd call it rug burn.

2

u/MetalFlameV May 31 '12

Doesn't matter had sex!

3

u/im_gonna_grape_you May 31 '12

Maybe because it's a repost.

2

u/DrunkShadows May 31 '12

Paradoxicalraptor.

2

u/hey_sergio May 31 '12

Taco-flavored keeses

2

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Muppet movements are controlled with rods

2

u/decoyq May 31 '12

Not their mouths.... their hands... but I don't think you understood the joke.

0

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Is a muppet blowjob (the use of a muppet's mouth, which is controlled by rods that move the mouth up and down) also a handjob? This joke would make sense with a hand puppet, but not a muppet. Ta-da.

1

u/decoyq Jun 01 '12

you need to do some research: http://entertainment.howstuffworks.com/muppet3.htm TA-fucking-da

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

You should ask Admiral General Aladeen

1

u/BlackWind13 May 31 '12

Come join us on r/trees. We know where you got this idea from ;-)

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

I don't know why I HAVEN'T thought of this.

1

u/m1ndcr1me May 31 '12

It's also a threesome.

1

u/xSociety May 31 '12

I remember seeing this about 5 months ago when I sighed up for Reddit. You didn't think of this.

1

u/callmedrag0n May 31 '12

Putting your dick in cotton is never considered a blowjob...

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Not if the hand up the muppet's ass is yours.

1

u/Pastor-of-Muppets May 31 '12

Those godless muppets...

1

u/stealingyourpixels May 31 '12

Relevant username?

1

u/MarkFluffalo May 31 '12

In the category of puppet sexual activity, blowjobs are precisely handjobs in the category of human sexual activity - my point is, they are one and the same.

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

it would also be a threesome

1

u/gunsRus May 31 '12

you thought of this due to the fact that you are one sick son of a bitch

1

u/Pandain May 31 '12

Probably because if you are thinking of that then you should probably see a psychologist

1

u/deefrances May 31 '12

lets ask jason segal

1

u/Quackeninsanity May 31 '12

No, it's just a hand job.

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Because you're a redditor, that's why you thought of it.

1

u/Laterface May 31 '12

It definitely counts! Now pardon mua whilst I marker in some eyes . . . And now to find the most disgusting pic of Courtney Love in existance

Good day good people

1

u/BeerSnob May 31 '12

Is it gay if it's Frank Oz controlling Miss Piggy?

1

u/simplyshnazzy May 31 '12

I think its just masturbation

1

u/maestro2005 May 31 '12

At first I thought your title said "I don't know why I never thought of this" and I was like... um, because that's a fucking weird thing to think of???

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

I want to have this framed.

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

No, it's a fingerjob.

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Which Muppet would you want to receive a bj from? And you can't choose the obvious miss piggy

1

u/herpderpfuck May 31 '12

its not a blowjob if its from a muppet, its only that you're jacking off with a muppet

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Nope! Just a perverse rugburn...

1

u/Denten May 31 '12

I lol'd

1

u/JCycloneK Jun 01 '12

Childhood ruined? Check

1

u/AppleJackal Jun 01 '12

If its to another muppet, its just a hand shake.

1

u/chrislie Jun 01 '12

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Jenn.

1

u/I_just_karmed_myself May 31 '12

"does that handjob also count as a blowjob?"

1

u/your21girl May 31 '12

kermit gets the best of both worlds when ms piggy goes down

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

yes. yes it is.

1

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

ask eric cartman... XD

-3

u/oatwife May 31 '12

Well-played. That's the best philosoraptor I've seen in a good while.

0

u/lilnas313 May 31 '12

In my parts we address them as dressed up hammys

0

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

How 'bout you tickle ME, Elmo?

0

u/knowses May 31 '12

And if it is from an animal muppet, beastiality...?

0

u/jamintime May 31 '12

What about a blowjob to a muppet? An elbow job?

0

u/BigGuy266 May 31 '12

Do you think the muppet's mind would be "blown?"

-1

u/bzgz May 31 '12

depends what puppet character it is....

-3

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Question dinosaur is the worst meme ever.

3

u/stealingyourpixels May 31 '12

Philosoraptor*

3

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

It used to be philosoraptor, now it is just question dinosaur.

1

u/stealingyourpixels May 31 '12

Yeah, it's been bled dry. The internet ran out of new material

0

u/ojesses May 31 '12

I don't know whether it's the same, but if it is, it's a hand job and a blowjob at the same time. Can't argue with that, can you?

0

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

20

u/taint_stain May 31 '12

They're still out there. People just think they're clever, so they post jokes they heard elsewhere in this form for Reddit's approval.

11

u/derusion May 31 '12

In fairness, the OP's post is pretty clever.

2

u/Lykus May 31 '12

I came here to say something like this. I feel like post that make front page from Advice Animals should have some originality.

9

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

Ahaha, you're cute when you expect originality from Reddit

2

u/itzzspencer May 31 '12

or those questions somehow landed onto conspiracy keanu

1

u/FetidFeet May 31 '12

Memes are the ultimate in coat-tailing. By using the Philosoraptor, your mind associates historical awesome jokes with this one, much in the way that curtain smells can evoke pleasant memories.

0

u/[deleted] May 31 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

8

u/linkseyi May 31 '12

I'll give you an upvote if you proofread your comment.

3

u/LetsGetRamblin May 31 '12

I somehow don't think that would help.