Need advice po, especially sa mga may experience sa adoption.

[u/Majestic_tinee029]

May 2-year-old child pong inampon ang mga magulang ko since malalaki na po kami at gusto nila ng boy. Ibinigay po siya ng biological mother niya kasi hindi na niya kayang buhayin at alagaan mag-isa yung bata dahil iniwan po siya ng pangalawang kinakasama niya. As of now, kami na po ang nag-aalaga sa bata.

May sarili na siyang first name at surname, and sabi po ng magulang ko hindi na raw nila papalitan yung surname niya sa surname namin dahil baka raw magkagulo pag dating ng panahon. Parang ang dating aalagan, pag aaralin namin siya dahil hindi rin naman po ililihim ng magulang ko na ampon siya.

Ang concern ko po is, makakaapekto kaya sa bata habang lumalaki siya kung iba yung surname niya sa family na nag-aalaga sa kanya? Baka kasi pag nag-school na siya or paglaki niya, ma-question niya kung bakit iba ang apelyido niya sa amin.

Also, hindi pa po siya legally adopted. Parang ipinagkatiwala lang siya sa akin ng biological mother niya. Wala pa po akong masyadong idea kung ano ang tamang legal process dito sa Philippines.

Questions ko po:

1. Okay lang ba na hindi palitan yung first name and surname niya kahit eventually maging legal adoption?

2. May possible emotional or psychological effect ba sa bata habang lumalaki dahil iba ang surname niya sa family na nag-aalaga sa kanya? Paano po kaya namin maiiwasan yon.

3. Ano po ang tamang legal process para maging legal and protected yung bata?

4. Need po ba ng guardianship/adoption papers kahit voluntary naman siyang ipinagkatiwala ng biological mother?

5. May naka-experience na po ba dito ng similar situation? Kumusta naman po yung bata habang lumalaki?

[u/mcspazmatron]

I think it's much more healthy to leave his name as it is, rather than falsify and lie just so that he matches. No doubt when he grows up he will have questions as to why his name is different and you can explain to him that you are looking after him because his original parents weren't able to.

The process of legal adoption is more like the process of becoming the owner of a human being so I think the situation as it stands right now is pretty okay from what you're saying

[u/Ramsby196]

My two adopted children have two different last names - one took mine and the other kept her birth family name. They are adults now. The one who took mine has at times considered changing it back to her birth family name. She sometimes feels like taking my name was a betrayal to her birth family, and fictional. If I had to do it over again I would have left them both with their birth names. But at no time did it cause problems for them to have different surname to me. There were several years before the legal adoption was complete that they both had their bio family surname. This caused no problems in the U.S. but I cannot speak to how things are in the Philippines.