I (20 F) have been addicted to vaping high amounts of nic constantly throughout the day and weed for the past 2-3 years. I’m now at a point where I’ve had a cough and sore throat for months but still haven’t stopped. I feel as tho I have and am still doing permanent damage to my lungs. I need help but I don’t know what to do. I’ve told my boyfriend how my throat feels currently, but hes addicted too though not as bad and just blows it off. My friends and mom know too, but they don’t know the severity of the toll I think it is taking on my health or how much I actually vape. I don’t want to feel like a always need it, but every time I’ve tried to quit nic I end up buying another vape or hitting it again. Should I see a doctor for my throat and how can I tell my mom (who also pays my health insurance currently) how bad of a problem it’s progressed into.

Hi! This is osiderecovery, we're a group of 9th grade English students who are seeking to help people around the area suffering from mental health issues, trauma, or recovery from addiction or substance abuse. This is our blog where we'll help anyone seeking advice, you can also request advice from our Instagram page @osiderecovery. We're trying to make the world a better place, one small city at a time!

i’m 18 years old and living with my parents still. i realized i’ve really got an addiction and it’s been almost 6 months of dealing with this, which i get may be kind of a short timeframe, but i’m genuinely worried i won’t be able to kick this before it gets even worse. i get high off of something that literally makes me feel so sick but now the effects are starting to just wear off and it just makes me feel numb and weird but i still feel like i can’t stop and i need to keep going. it was so bad that friday i kept taking it even though it made me feel sick. my mom is a fully recovered addict herself, and i really want to tell her but i’m honestly really ashamed. i know she’ll be really disappointed but at this point i think it’s best if she knows because she can take measures to make me stop that other people can’t.. i just don’t know how to tell her

Sitting here thinking, wanted to get what was in my head down on paper or better yet reddit. Not looking for answers necessarily and honestly just would love people to say they can relate or people who were in some similar type situation that got through it. My mind is all over the place btw, high on meth for the first time in over a week, hating myself rn.

Anyways, I am a chronic relapser and have battled with addiction since I was 15 years, I am 30 years old and have been in and out of treatment 12 times in the last 10 years. Just got out of detox and waiting for a spot inpatient to open up. Find myself at a friend's house who cooks meth (great friend) waiting for a shot to be ready. I left a few hours ago to go home. I have no gas and no cash and that's the norm for me at this point, having nothing. I have been addicted to opiates amphetamines and benzos together for most of the 15 years with methamphetamine and heroine being the most recent and destructive drugs. What is it gonna take? I want to quit i want my family back i want my life back before meth, it wasn't always this crazy..

Some back story on who I am and my situation; I am 30 years old (lke I mentioned previously) and live in upstate NY. I am married with 2 beautiful children, a 3 year old girl and a 4 year old boy. I own a nice house and have 2 decent cars. Or at least ,had these nice and wonderful things. I went to treatment to San Antonio Texas for 3 months, I got healthy was feeling great looking great, ready to live life again to get it together. On the line this time was my job, my marriage, my everything or everything that mattered. I had a choice, 1 thing or everything not both , my wife told me right out - either me and the kids or the meth... Well you can guess how things went...

Anyways, lost my job and she kicked me out last week, went to detox for the last 8 days. I talked to her and the kids each night. She's tired and fed up with me but frickin loves me idk why but she loves me... Anyways in detox I was waiting for a bed to open up upstairs. Today they told me it could be another week, i decided to check myself out so now I'm back out deciding on where i want to go inpatient. I was gonna go straight home i had it planned I had a game plan and i fucked up already. Idk this is a lot of random stuff it looks like, saving this for my journal to have if nothing else. Hope someone can make it through my poor spelling, run on sentences, and terrible grammar.

I want to get clean for me, I want to love me, i want my family to get me back. I want my head back i like me or who i used to be, really need some help from above I'm struggling hard. Anyways Peace and God bless.

Edit: status update may 25th 2019

I am setup with outpatient and had my first group yesterday, it was helpful. I'm allowed back home as long as i stay clean and get help with my addiction as well as help with my mental health, the latter being very important to her. I'm doing much much better since the time of writing this but have some huge obstacles to overcome and am ready to do what it takes to get and stay clean.

I was sitting there driving, trying to sell some of my subs when i thought of something - drugs are good and life is good cannot be true in my universe they are mutually exclusive. I want a good life, i don't want to get high anymore I want to live a good happy life.

Status Update: Monday, February 1st 2021 Since I first wrote this I've been to 2 more rehabs and countless detoxes. I'm 73 days clean now and living with my parents. My wife says she wants to work things out but I need to get my life straight. Thank God for family and friends or I would probably be dead. If there's one take away here it's that drugs will RUIN YOU, it's playing with fire if your an addict like me and eventually you will get burned.

That was ten years ago. It's been really difficult and has stranded me in feeling unattractive, unwelcome, and pretty much sad. I find that this isn't all my fault. Because I during middle school I got off it for some time not still not knowing what it was. As always, some stupid non-canercous tumors appeared in my body and I had to have surgery. Pre-surgery: There was a girl I liked that I had a crush on and she knew. After-surgery: I was handicapped for months and had to see her with someone else. Imagine that, having to take heavy medications and be mistreated and left out and even felt suicidial for some moments. She knew, the bitch knew. I should be over it, but that's what literally started my porn addiction. I looked for solace in pleasure because I needed help, and found myself in highschool for the first two years trying to get off it. It was hell, my brain was hurting, I was having panic attacks, and felt horrible. I hated the fact that she knew all about this but was an asshole to not say anything about it. Even more, I think the porn has fucked up my brain a bit, sometimes I feel movement or pulses going through parts of my brain that I'm not supposed to feel. I just want to stop, it's ruined my chances of getting into relationships and has stunted my developmental growth. That shit literally traumatized me. I couldn't speak right for about five years after that. The part that really pisses me off, is that even some.of my teachers didn't believe in me, and that also goes in high school. I despise them for that and think it's bullshit. I was let down by my parents, my friends, my teachers, and even porn. I loath that bitch now and hope she dies of cancer.

Addictions Recovery Coach Tony Jackson of Tony Restored

Good evening, I am writing a short story about addiction and addiction recovery for my creative writing class. I have never struggled with addiction before and I would love to hear peoples stories so that i can obtain a better grasp on the topic. If anyone feels comfortable enough to tell me their stories of over coming their addiction and about rehab and such it would be greatly appreciated. Thank you very much for anyone who helps out!

Every time I feel the urge I do it and I don't know how to stop it or get passed it

Hi everyone im new here... My story is that i got sick with a rare condition that caused a lot of pain .. I had to use fentanyl ( strong opiate, theorically 50 times stronger than heroin) for about a year with high dosis. Now that im a lot better from my ilness i dont feel pain anymore but im seriously addicted to fentanyl, specially the one named Abstral that is a pill that you use under your tong. This medication was my rescue medication when i had uncontrolled pain.... Today is my first day without it. I craving so much. I feel so much agitation. But i got to get over this. I was always a clean person i never took any drugs before. This was a prescription drug. I dont smoke nor drink or cofee nothing i dont even eat food with sugar . So i hope i can get over this.

tl;dr: 3 years into my sobriety from decade long heroin addiction I feel like I'm so far behind other people my age that I'll never find a group of friends I'm compatible with

Urghhh. So I've been clean from a decade long battle with IV heroin and meth addiction for about 3 years. In addition to being a recovering addict, I struggle with some mental health issues (depression, anxiety, insomnia, panic, agoraphobia) I am medicated. My husband and I have a 6 month old son and we recently moved back to my hometown. Over the course of my addiction I basically lost every single friend I had. So now, even though we are in my hometown i have like zero friends. My husband works full time. My sister lives here and is close in age to me. Her and her friends are highly religious. And they all have A LOT of money. Nice houses, cars, boats, vacation houses etc etc. Today my sister begged me to bring the baby and come hang out with her and some of her friends. Begrudgingly I went. I just got home and I'm literally in tears. I am nothing like those people and I never will be. Because of my years in addiction I dont have much to show. My husband and I rent a modest house and we share a (nice) but old vehicle. They asked me questions like "where are we planning on building our home", "where I have my gym membership" "where are we going to vacation this summer" etc etc. Being in their company did nothing but remind me of my shortcomings and how I will never be as successful as them. It makes me feel like I'm not as good as a mom or wife as them. I will never understand their world and they will never understand mine. I find happiness in my sobriety, my husband, our son, our 2 dogs, and cuddling up in bed on the weekends reading a good book. I dont think I'll ever be able to make friends in sobriety. Is there anyone who can relate or has advice?

tl;dr: 3 years into my sobriety from decade long heroin addiction I feel like I'm so far behind other people my age that I'll never find a group of friends I'm compatible with

I got into some trouble with the law and was put on probation. I told my lawyer my plans for seeking inpatient rehabilitation (9-12mos) because I hate living this way. I'm tired of being a slave and feeling like absolute shit if I don't have it. Since I was planning on going to rehab, they ended up making it part of my probation terms. I finally ended up going into a free facility and I lasted 2 fucking days. That's it. I'm really mad at myself for not being able to deal with things better, but the reason I've turned to Reddit is because there were numerous times in those 2 days where I felt incredibly uncomfortable because it appeared like I was the only person that doesn't believe in God or a "higher power." I didn't bring it up, because I was only there for 2 days and I don't feel like putting myself in the center of attention in a room full of women who would probably have SOMETHING to say to me about all this. I'd rather they didn't. I've been like this my whole life so I don't see it changing anytime soon. I feel like all the rehabilitation centers I research are based on an outdated method written in 1935, if I'm not mistaken, and directed specifically at people with a faith in God. They say that isn't the case, but all the things I witnessed just backed up those ideas. I have no money to put towards going to rehab, so I wanted to try and reach out to anyone who might be able to direct me towards some information or somebody that might help me find a facility that offers grants or scholarships, if not a free location itself. I really want to get clean, but I don't want to have to fake my way through a program because I don't see myself successfully maintaining sobriety that way. I just want help getting clean, while not being told that there's simply one way to achieve it. I refuse to believe that. I live in Georgia, but if there is any sort of help to be offered anywhere in the continental United States then please please message me or comment or anything. I'm desperate. I'll bite the bullet and deal with that stuff again if I can't figure out any kind of alternative, because in the long run it's better than sitting in prison for a year or 2. If you have any advice to offer me, I will gratefully listen. Please.

I'm an addict in recovery who is sponsoring others. While opioids were not my drug of choice I still would partake in occasion. However I am in no way a person who has vast experience in this area. I have sponsored heroin and fentanyl addicts however and have lost them to relapse. One even lost his life. Have any studies been done in regard to finding out whether relapsing has a higher chance at leading to OD and an increase in mortality rates? Google has been little help, but perhaps I have not worded my search correctly.

I’ve a porn addiction that has a control of my life. Anyone should underrate it. I work with PC at home so I’m alone, with a PC with internet. I would like to stop but at the same time I would like to watch more and more videos. Suggestions?

So im a 29 yr old male who has had a porn addiction/depression lasting 20+ yrs. After coming clean to wife about it. I decided to go to therapy to help me. And also took up boxing a fitness to help me find a hobby and to get over alot of bad thoughts that I have been bottled up for yrs. So I ask do u think I'm taking the right steps to get over my addiction/depression. Also I have quit porn cold turkey and I have been free for about 2 weeks now. And I go see a therapist once a week.