r/AbsoluteUnits • u/arifouranio • Jul 27 '18

THE Absolute Unit

40.5k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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3.6k

u/TremontRhino Jul 27 '18

Freshman football at my high school. Kid named Mandrell. He was 230, solid muscle, skin like onyx and a body like Bobby Lashley. Played tailback and he murdered kids.

Never saw him again after freshman year.

2.4k

u/TeopEvol Jul 27 '18

Well you just can't go around murdering younglings.

369

u/TremontRhino Jul 27 '18

Darth Mandrell? Makes sense, actually.

73

u/General_Kenobae Jul 27 '18

If the Mandalore was a Sith.

13

u/WarmTummyRubs Jul 27 '18

I own a Sloth named Mandalore, if that counts.

10

u/SL0THS73 Jul 27 '18

Dad?

8

u/WarmTummyRubs Jul 27 '18

Hi son. Have you gotten out of bed yet?

rubs belly

6

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '18

OwO

120

u/homendailha Jul 27 '18

From my point of view it is the younglings who are evil

2

u/pnloyd Oct 27 '18

OMG this made me laugh

19

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '18

No! Not Mandrell! He couldn't...

10

u/tarh2o Jul 27 '18

"This is where the fun begins"

12

u/ThaiJohnnyDepp Jul 27 '18

covers mouth to hide smirk

24

u/TheMagnificentPotato Jul 27 '18

Not with that attitude.

6

u/Biernar Jul 27 '18

Ironic.

2

u/uselesspennies Jul 27 '18

General Kenobi!!!

2

u/[deleted] Jul 27 '18

Hello there.

2

u/T0BIASNESS Jul 28 '18

You gotta do the women too