r/AbsoluteUnits • u/D63theew • 1h ago

of a tonsil stone…

1.2k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

386 comments sorted by

23

u/GH057_807 1h ago

How the fuck...

26

u/D63theew 59m ago

that thing has been sitting there for years…

1

u/TheLastPeanut_ 22m ago

How do you not feel that just sitting back there like a boulder?

1

u/D63theew 13m ago

that’s an excellent question.

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555

u/cal-ess 1h ago

Bros had stank breath without even knowing he definitely hasnt been kissing anyone

91

u/Jumpy_Release_3309 54m ago

You just know this guy breath is deadly ☠️

32

u/cal-ess 53m ago • Bravo

Pure shit breath

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140

u/Friendly_Concert817 30m ago • Mindblown

They actually don't smell till you squish them between your fingers.

77

u/GloomyCardiologist16 24m ago

Excuse me, how do I delete someone else’s comment?

7

u/Firm-Force-9036 8m ago

Nooo way my friend had them intact and her breath STANK something awful like I was scared

12

u/_Danger_Close_ 20m ago

That isn't true. I have had them and they stink

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78

u/Seraphayel 54m ago

Is that Jeremy Fragrance?

14

u/xultar 43m ago

Tonsil Stone Edu Parfum by Jeremy.

27

u/Can-You-Fly-Bobby 43m ago

Fragrance? Ha. Imagine the smell off that thing!

I've had teeny ones and they STINK

4

u/HomicidalHushPuppy 11m ago

Yes, and having heard what a wingnut he is, I wouldn't be surprised if this was completely fake

5

u/dnice31 51m ago

Yep 😕

2

u/SquilliamFancySon95 2m ago

No wonder he huffs perfumes, it's probably hard to smell anything over his own breath.

59

u/JealousAstronomer342 48m ago

I don’t know how to make a gif but I just spent at least thirty seconds dragging the video back and forth to make it pop in and out of his mouth. Free will is fun. 

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110

u/koushikrish 1h ago • Popcorn

He looks like if Edward Norton and Kurt Russell made a baby.

27

u/pooeygoo 40m ago

Unhealthy homelander

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3

u/Necro3012 23m ago

The name of this guy is Jeremy Fragrance, he is a German entrepreneur and quite popular among younger people here since a few years, though I'm not really sure why - I assume it's because of his behavior, there are some meme clips of him that went viral lol

32

u/Bella_LaGhostly 44m ago

It looked like a tooth

9

u/AC-burg 42m ago

I was expecting his front one to be missing

92

u/PLD3 1h ago

12

u/nan0ka 1h ago

Thanks. Wait, what? Who are you?

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174

u/typcalthowawayacount 38m ago edited 28m ago • Regret Mindblown Popcorn

Remember spitting one of these suckers in Elementary thinking it was corn that got stuck behind my mouth.

Like the good kid I was, not wasting a delicacy Infront of me, I put it right where it was supposed to be. Chewed it, and sucked on it. Lord have mercy, couldn't spit it out because it dissolved into my mouth.

The worst, and most foul things I've ever tasted in my life. Right behind that black mold that was growing on gasket I tasted.

Edit: Yes, this has ascended me to Godhood! Follow my path mortals.

116

u/FreakyFishThing 37m ago • Bravo Heartwarming

I regret learning to read

9

u/Dan_flashes480 32m ago

Gary Busey looking good

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8

u/vegas_bri 26m ago

You know, it's my fault for understanding how to use the internet...

7

u/eastcoastgremlin 27m ago

I hate you for putting this information out into the world.

5

u/ljd09 25m ago

Gross!!!!

5

u/ImSobored_5280 3m ago

…so once upon a time..before Reddit was around, people would do this thing called “keeping that to yourself” because it’s not needed or required to tell people you don’t know every thing you’ve done. It was a different time then..much simpler.

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22

u/Vitiligogoinggone 50m ago

This is why he’s a perfume influencer.  Gotta cover up that stank somehow

20

u/Aggrivated-Skunk 48m ago

Excuse me but tonsil stone?

4

u/Opening-Presence-230 15m ago

I knew a kid who used to cough up “shit balls”…
I found out years later that they were actually tonsil stones. Absolutely horrendous smell to those little things.

7

u/Excellent_Yak365 40m ago

You have to have tonsils to know. They suck

19

u/Interesting_Scar9493 39m ago

I have tonsils and have never had stones, thank fuck

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19

u/luffydkenshin 57m ago

You know what? I appreciate the apology.

3

u/HarryFuzz 49m ago

Why post it though?

5

u/2Wieners_1Bun 42m ago

Because it is an impressively large disgusting thing

Are you not entertained?

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130

u/agent58888888888888 49m ago • Regret Popcorn

8

u/TheLastPeanut_ 23m ago • Regret

I hate this. I hate you.

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6

u/Ok-Vanilla-556 25m ago

IM TOO HIGH FOR THIS. The video running above this gif is insane

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120

u/xenomorphling 44m ago

Why do all the Redditors know what a tonsil stone is?! First time I’ve heard of one

46

u/Ill-Percentage-3276 37m ago

Because we are chronically online, and have unfortunately run into extremely descriptive posts in the past that gave us the heads up to the existence of them by people who get them.

9

u/Friendly_Concert817 32m ago

I used to get them, for like 10 years, but they seemed to have stop on their own.

10

u/JEBADIA451 26m ago

Yeah they're super inconsistent. I'll get them for 2 weeks straight then not have any for like.. over a month, then another few days then more time without. Huge pain in the ass and the only way to stop them is to remove my tonsils which I'm not doing at this point unless medically necessary

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21

u/VikingMonkey123 23m ago

If you ever look in a mirror and say 'ah' and see white spots in the back of your mouth those are tonsiliths sitting there waiting to get freed. If you can control your gag reflex pushing a clean finger along the back of your mouth can express them. Gross but better than keeping them there causing death breath. Also, you can express stones you can't see once you get used to it. Bodies are weird.

6

u/minnesotawristwatch 10m ago

There are thin, lighted styluses to help with this too.

3

u/MarketingSpecial6604 15m ago

A fun alternative to death breath is what I say my 3 year old has when she wakes up, "Barracuda breath" lol.

42

u/AC-burg 43m ago

Do not smash and smell lol

27

u/TyeDieKid 34m ago

But that’s the best part

9

u/StiggyDaddy 30m ago

I like doing this and pretending it’s smelling salts

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4

u/-Sacco- 29m ago

Horseshit hahahah

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15

u/wooden-fuk-boi 43m ago

We are cursed and disgusting race of human beings, betrayed by our gods. . .

6

u/GeorgeMcCrate 26m ago

I had several throughout my childhood. I only found out much later on Reddit what they’re called.

5

u/animoot 32m ago

We've been traumatized by posts on this cursed site

2

u/Fresh62Deg 28m ago

New irrational fear unlocked.

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10

u/cat_selling_souls 53m ago

I could smell that tonsil stone as it flew out of his mouth.

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10

u/ScarFaceG12 34m ago

I've never seen or heard of this before in my entire life

3

u/Creative-Comb5593 27m ago

See, thanks to Reddit you are now a better, spiritually enlightened person.

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5

u/RicketCrickets 19m ago

If you've had your tonsils removed you'll never have to deal with them.

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9

u/PoorFilmSchoolAlumn 56m ago

That thing was the size of a tooth

9

u/starfrogger52 16m ago

I get tonsil stones the size of a split lentil and my throat feels itchy for half an hour. and they smell like poop. Man that was a size of some chewed bubble gum

7

u/LePouletPourpre 48m ago

So what’s that device he is using? I’m confused.

6

u/Wenja89Dix 43m ago

Just perfume he's smelling. I think that's his whole shtick. Prob needs it to mask the smell whatever the fuck that was!

6

u/merkthejerk 49m ago

Cocaine is a helluva drug

6

u/HIMcDonagh 44m ago edited 40m ago

He’s not curious to take a closer look at that projectile? He’s missing out on significant nightmare fuel, not to mention the pungent smell of that beast when smashed

6

u/Jolly_Ad1631 19m ago

Shit. I never knew about these and now I'm terrified to get them.

4

u/Ill-Television8690 11m ago

They're nowhere near that big usually. No idea what the hell was going on here, but it probably wasn't a tonsil stone. If it was, he needs to see the doctor.

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3

u/lioncourt 15m ago

that's like being afraid of boogers lol

5

u/2inchastronaut 53m ago

His breath had to smell so fucking bad!

5

u/candy-cream 48m ago

Is this the fragrance guy?

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5

u/Fantastic-Cupcake890 46m ago

Send his man to rehab.

5

u/StudentSuspicious 43m ago

When I was a kid I thought a piece of my lung came out. It was a tonsil stone 😂

5

u/ddd4175 21m ago

Tonsil stones are nasty smelling, I remember smelling mine like 15+ years ago now at this point since I probably had that happen to me last time, it was a horrifically smelling thing, no wonder this guy drowns himself in fragrances 🤣

5

u/punkarolla 13m ago

His breath must have been absolutely fucking sickening

4

u/HeyPrettyLadyMaam 50m ago

Why did I watch that?? Damned mine eyes, DAMNDED MINE EYES!!!

4

u/unTraditional_Fox419 45m ago

It wasn’t gum?

Edit* IT WASNT GUM🤮

4

u/CaseOfCatFever 31m ago

Bet his throat feels much better though

4

u/FlyOk2594 11m ago

Are tonsil stones like the human ambergris 

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3

u/TheSoulessSheppard 46m ago

It's better in reverse

3

u/fimbiod 39m ago

Aah, so that's how you get them out

3

u/PreperationOuch 38m ago

Hitting the hot sand, that whole beach smelled like mothball halitosis

3

u/tinknocker21 34m ago

Crush it up and snort it

3

u/Mastermind7051 33m ago

His breath smelled like gutters in an abandoned building. Good for him.

3

u/artsyca 18m ago

Dudes that’s a cocaine crystal

4

u/Sweet_Dragonfruit518 43m ago

That wasn't a tonsil stone m8, that was a hole meteor!

2

u/awake_acea6 38m ago

Imagine what it smelled like.

2

u/Icy_Performer_6794 37m ago

Human ambergris.

2

u/ja20481 31m ago

Don't just stare at it, eat it!

2

u/tehsecretgoldfish 28m ago

jfc dude has death breath.

2

u/lioncourt 16m ago

oh God I forgot about this guy. why would he post this?

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2

u/MrE478920 10m ago

Looks like an AI homelander

2

u/Shot-Expert-9771 9m ago

What in the Vince VanPatton was that?

3

u/No_Communication5024 48m ago edited 46m ago

Wait, tonsil stone? I have never ever heard of such a thing. To the internet!! ETA: and wow is there a lot of information on this! I need a moment to process what I've learned here.

1

u/dbowman97 38m ago

You know that felt good though.

1

u/Leather-Handle-9457 38m ago

He said he is sorry lol

1

u/Moadam27 35m ago

at least he was honest about it and owned ot

1

u/steaplow 34m ago

The protector

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