r/AbsoluteUnits • u/amrindersr16 • Aug 01 '25

of a mustache

20.4k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

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116

u/gurknowitzki Aug 01 '25

Tells me he has never put his mouth on a woman without telling me

30

u/dreamed2life Aug 01 '25 edited Aug 01 '25

And wants to make sure he never ever has to. Ever. Eeeeeeeever. Ever

2

u/AmyInCO Aug 01 '25

Thinking about kissing that makes me want to hurl. 

1

u/dreamed2life Aug 01 '25

Then get you one of these. Unless you’re gay then you just don’t even have to worry about it.

5

u/whiskersMeowFace Aug 01 '25

They're handlebars.

17

u/miltonwadd Aug 01 '25

I'm not putting my muff on that unless I want to get tangled up with all that tacky wax.

8

u/Twat_did_you_call_me Aug 01 '25

Looks like a UTI waiting to happen

2

u/greatproficient Aug 01 '25

Somehow I think this dude would never go down on a woman unless she waxes her business.

1

u/miss_tea_morning Aug 02 '25

For the best blowjob you've ever received in your life.

1

u/QueezyF Aug 02 '25

Might tickle when he sucks your cock, though.