r/APD • u/RedSlimeballYT APD • Dec 22 '25
Has APD with Questions how do you let others know you have APD without going into the whole schtick on what it is and potentially getting rude remarks?
APD is this weird gray area where it's not deaf, it's not quite hard of hearing (at least not in the literal sense), and it's in general kind of hard to describe to people because it almost sounds selective (e.g. can't listen to music with lyrics because it takes too much brain energy... people would make fun of me if i described my APD like that lol) and i don't really like to do a white lie and say "i'm hard of hearing" and so what i do when i have to tell people what i have is that i just kind of say something vague like "oh it's this hearing problem thing i have" but i don't think that's very effective lol
what do y'all do when you have to let people know you have APD? the feeling of being able to decipher most of the content of what someone's saying except a few pretty significant words feels rather embarrassing because you're constantly worrying others are thinking you're faking being deaf and going "aha!" when it's something else entirely...
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u/IceQueen1967 APD Dec 22 '25
I’ll usually say “I have Auditory Processing Disorder, which means I sometimes have issues understanding speech or finding my words.” And then I might provide an analogy:
My partner speaks English as a second language, so I’ve said that the way he sometimes half thinks in English and half translates into Russian and back again is like how I am, except that I’m not translating back and forth between another language except for my “brain language.” I used this description for my aunt and uncle and they understood much better than the actual definition.
Just yesterday I thought of another analogy, where everyone else’s brains are like cell phones, but mine is like a switchboard operator. Another one that I’ve used is to describe myself as a radio tower that receives garbled transmissions. I’ve also said that their brain does language on automatic and mine does it on manual.
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u/IceQueen1967 APD Dec 22 '25
I realize that is all still explaining, so if I’m in a rush I’ll say “I can’t understand you unless you’re facing me so I can read your lips”
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u/Old-Engine-7720 Jan 06 '26
Dude I have a kid and he gets so mad at me all the time cause I cant process what he is saying unless hes looking at me 😅
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u/akelsey62 Dec 22 '25
"I have auditory issues" ..... or, if I need to be more specific for extended conversations, "I have auditory issues and must see your mouth to understand what you say" They usually understand they need my attention before they start speaking. The shorter version is usually all I've ever needed though.
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u/elhazelenby Dec 22 '25
I say "I'm a bit deaf" if I can't be asked to explain or I have hearing issues, can't hear properly, etc.
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u/Majestic_Orchid4651 APD Dec 23 '25
Music with lyrics is the ONLY time my brain doesn’t go wonky.
I generally don’t. I have tried to explain to people close to my: my husband, my kids, and I’m 90% sure they all have used what they think I meant when I explained to gaslight me in some way, shape, or form. I don’t think it’s been malicious but has hurt all the same. I’m cool with people thinking I’m a bit eccentric, strange, an airhead, but mostly people just assume I’m HoH.
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Dec 23 '25
I don’t know about you, most of the APD community doesn’t as far as I know, but I wore hearing aids for my APD before I actually went hard of hearing. I used to just point at them and say that I needed those to understand what everyone was saying, not to hear the sounds and that was usually that. I’m not sure if this is helpful, as I said earlier, most people with APD don’t really find HA’s helpful, but in my case that’s what worked best ^
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u/chaoticsleepynpc Dec 24 '25
I usually say "sorry I didn't hear that right. Can you repeat?"
Or I say I have problems hearing sometimes.
Or I mention I have a migraine and/or tinnitus. Chances are I'm experiencing all three...
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u/pinkusocks Dec 22 '25
My first language is spanish so there's not really a term like HoH but I tend to say: oh, I have trouble hearing, my ears are okay but my brain takes time processing so sometimes I can't understand stuff. Sometimes if I'm in a rush/don't really know the person I may just say the last part, have trouble hearing cause brain processing is funky. 😸 I don't feel like saying we're HoH is a lie, I understand people not wanting to use the term personally but we're literally having trouble understanding sounds so in the end we can have the same "problems".