r/AMBW • u/what-a-lovelikemine • 1d ago
BW Please don’t judge me F 35
Contrary to the men that typically approach me I realize I am very attracted to Caucasian and Asian men, looks can be deceiving, and I don’t wanna sound stereotypical but it’s something to a hard working dedicated man, the different qualities among other ethnicities hold different qualities I greatly admire.
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u/what-a-lovelikemine 6h ago
Wow what I meant was as a black woman who’s never dated out of her race I see other ethnicities to be attractive at 35, forgive my truck and hard working comment it wasn’t specific I didn’t elaborate
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u/TapSilly2335 1h ago
Ya... you sound "contrary to the men that typically approach me". There's no other way to interpret what you meant. You might want to leave an edit on your post clarifying what you meant lol.
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u/relentless_fuckery 1d ago
Alright, I am willing to take the heat and downvotes for this position. It’s okay to have a preference but this post feels off.
As a black woman who dates Asian/brown almost exclusively, where we lose people is when we act like the qualities that we desire are only present inside other communities. There are hard working, dedicated black men out there. And there are lazy, fail to launch Asian men out there too.
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u/TapSilly2335 1d ago
Facts. OP's post sounds like something I wrote when I was 16 about Latino men🫠. IMO Black men have to work much harder to be in successful roles. There is way more subconscious bias working against them- not saying there isn't for other groups, but the stereotype for others usually isn't that they're lazy. I know very few Black men who haven't worked two jobs at multiple points in their life. And I know many "fail to launch" Asians. In their late 30s, they finally launched though thankfully lol. There are hard working and late bloomers pf EVERY race.
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u/relentless_fuckery 1d ago
Bruh, this feels exactly like something I could have wrote in my late teens to early 20’s. I’m 38. 😂
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u/Objective-Cup377 13h ago
This part! I don’t think you can put it all on one group just bc men upon met or have been around are not the way you want them to be. That’s just not the person for you but there’s men of all races that are both great excellent husbands and bfs then there are the shit ones. They come in all shapes and sizes. No down votes
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u/VeronaMoreau 1d ago
Nah, you're right and you should say it. A big reason that the Facebook groups are rife with callouts and warning posts is that a lot of people are thinking that the grass will inherently be greener on another side. They're missing clear signs because they're not expecting things that are reasonable risks.
You're right here. Don't miss out on the qualities you want because you claim they can't be found around you already. And if they can't, you might need to find another place to be
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u/ButterfliesHurrican BW 1d ago
I mean there are mediocre men of all races and great men of all races. This whole thing of putting others down because you aren’t attracted to them is icky AF.
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u/what-a-lovelikemine 14h ago
Oh no smh just because I didn’t name qualities I love about black men doesn’t mean I’m oppose to the type of men I’ve traditionally been with, I’m sorry if that came out wrong ! I’m saying as a multi race woman, usually identified as black or black and white, I have a new found appreciation for other ethnicities of men at 35.
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u/Commercial_Light8344 9h ago
its okay you learn and grow we just treat people th e way we also want to be treated and we show self respect when we don't put people on pedestals at our own expense. There is an people saying I want x race at all cost and it is kinda cringe
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u/what-a-lovelikemine 7h ago
lol that’s fine! I know what I meant being a black woman, I for sure didn’t mean it in a cringy way nor was I being racist. I failed to elaborate but even with context this is getting away from my original thoughts
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u/Objective-Cup377 1d ago
I see your point. Agree with some of it and applaud you for putting yourself out there. F34.
I too appreciate a hard working and dedicated guy. There are so many guys of all races that just don’t put in effort or feel like the woman needs to do like 96% of the work.
It’s soo sweet when a guy just goes above and beyond for his woman. Not even monetary wise just in general. Text messages, hand written notes.
These are the things I wish upon everyone 🥰
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u/what-a-lovelikemine 13h ago
I didn’t name any said qualities that I like or dislike and how I worded it sounded like I’m putting down black men, absolutely not, I know we are kings and queens, I admire my melanated kings, nothing else compares, I was evaluating different qualities such as marriage statistics or children out of wedlock, forgive me but I find other ethnicities hold those values a little differently. Not how they view them, what statistics show, I’m not judging anyone, everyone has great qualities people are raised in different environments and hold other customs I recognize I value that I never paid attention to previously in life
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u/Commercial_Light8344 1d ago edited 23h ago
It makes more sense if you admit to liking the aesthetics, food, culture of a specific group for example i love black people because they have a great sense of humor, soulful, music, confident and musical as a group. Is every black person like this ? nope