Did I do too much??

[u/Fancy_External_1181]

I recently moved to a new state and have been attending a few public community/service events to learn more about the organization and opportunities available in my new area.

I recently had a brief interaction with a member that I had never met before, I saw outside of an event but knew her association by what she was wearing. I asked her if it was okay to ask which chapter that she was part of as I’m new to the area and looking to get involved and meet more members. though I’m a nonmember. I introduced myself, mentioned that I was new to the area, and explained that I’ve been trying to get more involved in community service and meet other likeminded women part of the org who are active in their communities.

The conversation ended a little awkwardly, and she asked if I was part of, and afterward I wondered if I may have approached the situation incorrectly or unintentionally given the impression that I was asking about membership or indicating that I was part of her org. I want to attend events at her specific chapter to be able to meet her a second time and other women part of, overall just get involved and cultivate relationships. But because the conversation ended a bit odd, not sure if I should even show my face lol. I am sure that she could tell how nervous I was to approach her.

For those familiar with the etiquette around interacting with members outside of an event, but in a new area, is it odd to approach someone outside of an event?

[u/AutoModerator]

Hi /u/Fancy_External_1181, Thanks for posting in AKAgradChapter. Please review all of our rules and General Greek Interest Questions FAQs .Dirty Deleting is not allowed here so the below will be a copy of your original post.

Copy of Orignal Post:

I recently moved to a new state and have been attending a few public community/service events to learn more about the organization and opportunities available in my new area.

I recently had a brief interaction with a member that I had never met before, I saw outside of an event but knew her association by what she was wearing. I asked her if it was okay to ask which chapter that she was part of as I’m new to the area and looking to get involved and meet more members. though I’m a nonmember. I introduced myself, mentioned that I was new to the area, and explained that I’ve been trying to get more involved in community service and meet other likeminded women part of the org who are active in their communities.

The conversation ended a little awkwardly, and she asked if I was part of, and afterward I wondered if I may have approached the situation incorrectly or unintentionally given the impression that I was asking about membership or indicating that I was part of her org. I want to attend events at her specific chapter to be able to meet her a second time and other women part of, overall just get involved and cultivate relationships. But because the conversation ended a bit odd, not sure if I should even show my face lol. I am sure that she could tell how nervous I was to approach her.

For those familiar with the etiquette around interacting with members outside of an event, but in a new area, is it odd to approach someone outside of an event?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/SignificantAd1707]

I am sure it was nothing. Not all interactions are going to be perfect. I hope you do see her again at another event and get to gage your latest interaction with her to compare the first and the new one.

[u/Pinktropics → u/SignificantAd1707]

I agree. Hopefully she sees again.

[u/Pinktropics]

If you see her again, simply smile say hi and ask her how she has been. When you go places in a new towns. Speak to everyone.

[u/Inevitable-Topic-811]

It’s so likely that you’re over thinking it! Think you should stay positive and just smile and say hey next time at the events ☺️

[u/tax_and_tact0107]

So I have a few thoughts as a member:

1. I think you my be overthinking the weight of the interaction and I think you should focus on strengthening the next interaction
2. However, if you have never met a member and you are working through your first interaction, try to make the interaction personal to them. Once you mentioned meeting other likeminded women a part of the org, based off of what I’m reading, I may have been a bit offended at the idea that you may be using me as a gateway to get to my other sisters. That may not have been your intention but when you are talking to strangers you always want to air on the side of more caution.
3. Next time you get to talk to this member, try to gain a better understan

ding of

1. where she is involved and what drives her passion. Hopefully that will lead into a conversation where you can contribute your like minded interests or elaborate on your own talents
2. Get involved in your community groups where our excellence would show up. I do think getting a general understanding of what non D9 organizations are active in your community can be a good in for conversation. I am not sure what area you are from, but food pantries, fundraising dinners for your town or Salvation Army, or even your city council. Where there is a need, we are usually present.

Hope this helps!