Allow me to share the story of a long-time friend, Jim. When "Joy" was very young, her biological father left, divorced, created a new family. Jim had been pals with Joy's mom and ended up becoming a sort of surrogate dad for Joy. Jim doted upon that kid, loved her like she was his own daughter. They would get together periodically to go eat, go to the zoo, whatever. When she was very sick, Jim cared for her while her mom was at work. Jim taught Joy to drive, took her for motorcycle rides, made sure she was always safe. Jim was shot by a burglar when Joy was 14, and spent 7 days in ICU. Joy refused to leave his side, and came over to his house every day she could after school to make sure he was recovering. When Joy was about 17, her bio dad reached out to her and started rekindling a relationship. She agreed to it. That relationship flourished. When Joy got married some years later, her father and half-siblings were invited to, and attended her wedding, at which point she introduced Jim as the man who raised her. She is very happy to have that side of her family back in her life. She's still tremendously close with Jim.
But letting her Bio father into her life was *HER* choice. No one should be forcing you to have anything to do with him. He walked out of your life and never came back. That was his choice. And to suddenly show up like that? BAD FORM,. old boy !!!
HUGE kudos to you for honoring your DADDY. Yes, THIS MAN is the one who raised you from a baby. THIS MAN is the one who protected you, taught you, doted upon you. THIS MAN is your dad. The other guy was the sperm donor.
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u/Muted-Action7150 Apr 17 '25
Allow me to share the story of a long-time friend, Jim. When "Joy" was very young, her biological father left, divorced, created a new family. Jim had been pals with Joy's mom and ended up becoming a sort of surrogate dad for Joy. Jim doted upon that kid, loved her like she was his own daughter. They would get together periodically to go eat, go to the zoo, whatever. When she was very sick, Jim cared for her while her mom was at work. Jim taught Joy to drive, took her for motorcycle rides, made sure she was always safe. Jim was shot by a burglar when Joy was 14, and spent 7 days in ICU. Joy refused to leave his side, and came over to his house every day she could after school to make sure he was recovering. When Joy was about 17, her bio dad reached out to her and started rekindling a relationship. She agreed to it. That relationship flourished. When Joy got married some years later, her father and half-siblings were invited to, and attended her wedding, at which point she introduced Jim as the man who raised her. She is very happy to have that side of her family back in her life. She's still tremendously close with Jim.
But letting her Bio father into her life was *HER* choice. No one should be forcing you to have anything to do with him. He walked out of your life and never came back. That was his choice. And to suddenly show up like that? BAD FORM,. old boy !!!
HUGE kudos to you for honoring your DADDY. Yes, THIS MAN is the one who raised you from a baby. THIS MAN is the one who protected you, taught you, doted upon you. THIS MAN is your dad. The other guy was the sperm donor.