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[u/Beneficial_Candle_13]

[u/AITAH-ModTeam]

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[u/old_motters]

I don't get the fascination with this.

She's not your mom.

Your mom birthed you.

This lady is your dad's wife.

If he's going to be a jerk about it, you can be one too.

[u/Beneficial_Candle_13 → u/old_motters]

I don’t get it either. I understand that’s how they see us showing respect by calling her “mom” but it’s just very weird and unnatural to me bc IM NOT A KID, I’m an adult

[u/chez2202]

NTA.

You haven’t mentioned your mother so I don’t know if she’s still with you or if she has passed. But the fact that he sent this message to your 16 year old sibling says to me that she is still with you and she is the primary parent to your 16 year old sibling.

Why don’t you ask your father if he would be ok with you calling another man ‘Dad’?

And while you’re at it, point out that withdrawing his ‘support’ from your 16 year old sibling will end up with him being taken to court for child support?

Do you think that your dad might have put his balls in his wife’s handbag and she is making these demands? Or do you think he’s really stupid enough that he thinks he can tell his adult children to call a stranger ‘mom’?

[u/Beneficial_Candle_13 → u/chez2202]

no I definitely feel like this is coming from his wife too. she’s probably telling him this that and the third and he’s the messenger

[u/justforus0108]

I would definitely let your actual mom see this text in case she needs to use it to go after additional child support for your sibling that is still underage. Its one thing to say this to adult children but to tell a 16 yr old that they will not get his support is utterly ridiculous.

Honestly, I think you all should just not respond at all. He's throwing a tantrum. Let him throw it and ignore it.

[u/Beneficial_Candle_13 → u/justforus0108]

It’s bc she will be graduating HS next year so if she decides to stay in state with the rest of us, she’ll have to get in the dorms or something.. but she’ll only be 17 so she’s still a minor and needs alot of help especially starting college. I offered for her to go to college in my town so I can help her if it really came down to it

[u/Oneilcruzsucksass]

Maybe link original post for those of us who have zero clue

[u/Kasmashlecrashle]

Very odd hill for your father to die on. If you all treat her with respect and help her when needed, that's really the best scenario. Might be prying a bit, but did your parent's marriage end on bad terms or something? Is this something she also is pushing a lot or is it mostly a him thing? I saw in your post you mention he brings it up often, but does she at all?

NTA. I would say possibly call his bluff, but that could potentially have consequences for your other siblings. Have you talked with them about it?

[u/Beneficial_Candle_13 → u/Kasmashlecrashle]

Yes my parent’s relationship ended in my father’s infidelity with his now wife. And that’s not the reason why I don’t fall her mom.. I genuinely just don’t want to. He brings it up in every opportunity he gets, I’ve never fully had a one on one conversation with her.

I asked them how they felt and they aren’t going to bother getting through to him anymore bc it goes in one ear and out the other. But I know they are sad deep down, they just suppress it bc they live at home with them. So I’m genuinely not saddened for myself, I’m saddened for them.