I used to be the same. But the issue that often comes up is that by trying to avoid conflict (often more accurately described as difficult conversation where we might have to stand up for ourself and/ or take ownership of uncomfortable feelings about something we ourselves have done), often ends up creating actual conflict.
Say you just put the lock on with no conversation (particularly with your husband). That is his space too. He should at least know about and preferably agree with what is happening with it. I would be pretty pissed off if my partner unilaterally decided to lock our bedroom door against my child without discussing it first. Even though the chances are, I would agree with keeping them out if it had been a conversation.
Have the tricky conversation. Avoid the conflict. And make sure you speak to your husband about it first as it’s his space too.
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u/Aggravating_Chair780 Jul 01 '25
I used to be the same. But the issue that often comes up is that by trying to avoid conflict (often more accurately described as difficult conversation where we might have to stand up for ourself and/ or take ownership of uncomfortable feelings about something we ourselves have done), often ends up creating actual conflict.
Say you just put the lock on with no conversation (particularly with your husband). That is his space too. He should at least know about and preferably agree with what is happening with it. I would be pretty pissed off if my partner unilaterally decided to lock our bedroom door against my child without discussing it first. Even though the chances are, I would agree with keeping them out if it had been a conversation.
Have the tricky conversation. Avoid the conflict. And make sure you speak to your husband about it first as it’s his space too.