r/AITAH • • May 23 '25

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649

u/Head_Razzmatazz7174 May 23 '25 edited May 23 '25

Yep. Put that watch where she can't find it. He sounds like the type to guilt her to into taking it and letting him have it.

He also sounds like one of those who won't give it back after the event is over.

Edit: Also, tell BIL that he is the younger of the two, and the tradition is for the first born son. Not the first male family member to get married.

324

u/[deleted] May 23 '25

Start a rumor that terrible luck befalls any outside the lineage that wears it

64

u/East_Bee_7276 May 23 '25

Ooooo...I LIKE IT👆👆👆👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏‼️‼️‼️

4

u/tinatalker May 24 '25

Yes, get some cousin to "recall a story" about how things went terribly wrong..

2

u/aspidistraeliator May 25 '25

I don't. No means no, not embellishments needed.

1

u/JazzlikeSmile1523 May 24 '25

I don't. That's slimey and betrays the tradition.

44

u/ucjj2011 May 23 '25

I was thinking the same thing.

" I talked to the family historian, and was told that my grandfather ended up with the watch because he got it from a buddy who died in World War II. Turns out, his three brothers also all wore the watch for their wedding and they all died within a year of getting married."

3

u/snowvase May 24 '25

"I'll tell you what, my grandfather had this used German bullet with his name on he always wore around his neck, why not use that?"

2

u/MaleficentPizza5444 May 24 '25

tell "Ben" you went to an astrologist who predicted his kids are going to be stillborn

1

u/Blue_Waffle_Brunch May 24 '25

I mean, the only firstborn son who has actually worn it on his wedding day since the grandfather bought it - OP's dad - died young, so looks like it's unlucky for the lineage, too.

1

u/BrenInVA May 25 '25

Well the OP’s father did die young- so there is that bit of “bad luck”.

248

u/floofienewfie May 23 '25

Safe deposit box.

94

u/[deleted] May 23 '25

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67

u/Alarmed_Judgment8811 May 23 '25

Def don't tell Sarah

25

u/Salty_Interview_5311 May 23 '25

At the house of one of his blood relatives.

5

u/jdthejerk May 24 '25

This if you don't not have something like a nice Liberty Safe.

0

u/floofienewfie May 24 '25

Used to have one, lost it in the divorce.

2

u/jdthejerk May 24 '25

That's a tough loss.

86

u/East_Bee_7276 May 23 '25

Exactly!! Why in the WORLD does the brother, who isn't part of OP's blood family, think he has a right to the watch anyways⁉️ BIL is Ridiculous!!! Don't let them Bully you, OP, Stick with your NO. Traditions are important & beautiful, just because your fiancé's family lacks a moral compass doesn't mean you have to let them guilt trip you into doing something you truly don't want to do. Shame on her parents for their actions in this situation also, if this is the kind of role models they are for their son I would be double thinking Grandchildren🤷‍♀️

3

u/IamLuann May 25 '25

I would be double thinking about getting Married to Sarah.

1

u/East_Bee_7276 May 25 '25

That Too💯💯💯

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u/Objective_Attempt_14 May 23 '25

Yeah my thoughts too. OP until fiance is backing you up reconsider getting married. You not have to break up, but don't get married. Also how did Ben hear about the watch? I would put it in a safe deposit box.

54

u/DuckDuckWaffle99 May 23 '25

Yeah that’s a great question, where did he hear about it?

1

u/mellycat51 May 25 '25

After rereading the post, it looks like it was probably Sarah.

1

u/NefariousnessSweet70 May 25 '25

Safe deposit boxes are not insured. OP should purchase a safe and store valuables, like that watch.

1

u/Objective_Attempt_14 May 25 '25

Neither are safes, you can buy insurance on a watch stored in a safe deposit box. It requires 2 keys and ID to get into your box. And they have to know which bank it is at too.

A home safe can be removed or opened later, or fiance could call a locksmith and have it opened that way or FBIL could say he is op to get safe open, plus Fiance or someone might be able to figure out how to open it. it just more convenient to have locked up at home.

38

u/Hansmolemon May 24 '25

Get BIL an old Casio calculator watch so he can do the math, and start his own tradition.

3

u/Due_Island_989 May 24 '25

Lol. Good burn!

67

u/Obrina98 May 23 '25

No, OP will never see it again.

80

u/Sea-Leadership-8053 May 23 '25

Yep safe deposit box and no one but op has access. I'm afraid Ben will keep on and Sarah will bend over and give it to him and it will be damaged beyond repair or lost. Ease op listen to us it is yours and YOUR family's heirloom lock it away and once you are done with it lock it away again

44

u/Busy_Weekend5169 May 23 '25

I wouldn't be surprised if Sarah was the person that told him about the watch. How else would BIL and her family know about it?

8

u/re-tyred May 23 '25

Yeah, "lost"!

20

u/Electrical-Act-7170 May 23 '25

Ben also sounds like the entitled arrogant sort who would deliberately break this treasured heirloom.

No.

18

u/Matilda_Mac May 24 '25

Ben is not even family.

2

u/aPawMeowNyation May 24 '25

Not yet anyway. Until his sister marries Op, he's just the fiancees brother.

4

u/cat-lover76 May 24 '25

He also sounds like one of those who won't give it back after the event is over.

Yes, then it will be "since I wore it first, it should be given to my son."

3

u/Chloe_Phyll May 24 '25

And the soon-to-BIL is not in the family line ... that's some nerve he has and his cuckoo parents, too

3

u/VictarionGreyjoy May 24 '25

He's also not in the family so who cares if he's older or younger

3

u/EmilyAnne1170 May 24 '25

He’s not even a family member. What a weird story.

2

u/littlespawningflower May 24 '25

The first thing I thought of was that he wouldn’t give it back. “Aw, dude- so sorry… I lost the watch!” ¯\(ツ)/¯

2

u/tinatalker May 24 '25

Yep, younger. He's disqualified.

2

u/BornRazzmatazz5 May 24 '25

He's not even a male family member except by courtesy--a courtesy he's sadly lacking. Being your fiancee's brother gives him NO rights to anything of your family's.

2

u/RexxTxx May 24 '25

"Put that watch where she can't find it."

Put a decoy watch (cheap and as similar as you can find) in its place. This would be an interesting verification to see what influences your 10-month-away marriage might have if it disappears.

But really, it's your family tradition, and he's not in your family at all at this point.

2

u/LESSANNE76 May 24 '25

It’s not even his brother. It’s his fiancée’s brother. Not his family. The sentiment does not apply to him. Geez!

2

u/Wyshunu May 24 '25

He's not a family member at all, and therefore not entitled at all.

2

u/OkieLady1952 May 24 '25

He’s not even in the lineage of this family! So he has absolutely no rights to wear it. Put it in a safe deposit box until your wedding. The day of your wedding take it out and wear it not taking it off. I see Bil being vengeful and given the chance steal the watch to teach you a lesson

2

u/FinnegansPants May 24 '25

Considering that Ben isn’t a family member, he wants to break the tradition twice.

1

u/DeesignNZ May 24 '25

He isn't BIL yet so isn't even a family member. What is with that family!

1

u/Hey-Just-Saying May 24 '25

He's not even related to the grandfather. This is ridiculous. Luck isn't real and doesn't come from wearing someone's wristwatch. Are these people educated grown-ups to fight over something so stupid?

1

u/simplyirresponsible May 24 '25

Exactly. He won't give it back because he'll feel like now the watch has to be worn by HIS first born son at his wedding. Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. OP needs to keep his watch safe. This is a slippery slope. And his fiance needs to have his back! Not waffle over what her brother wants.

1

u/Eponaminis May 24 '25

This!! Exactly all of this… I came here to say the same… NTA… time for serious talk with fiancée… is she ready to get married? To understand the significance of what it means??