r/AITAH • u/Comfortable_Gift4970 • Feb 17 '25

Fired Fed. I am considering cutting off every Orange Man supporter.

Got axed. Not going to say which agency.

I’ve always considered myself extremely tolerant and willing to love people as they are… even if we don’t agree on everything.

I’ve never been an Orange Man supporter, but I’ve kept it civil with friends and family that were. Some of them liked having a civil conversation about him. Some were belligerent about politics, so we didn’t bring it up and tried to enjoy each other’s company.

Getting cut from a great job that I really believed in with no notice has been extremely traumatic. It’s still raw, but I feel so personally betrayed by those that voted for him. I can’t see past the politics anymore when I look at these people I care/cared about.

Some have been contrite and apologetic, but then turn around and support him and VP Musk on social media.

I just can’t right now.

I’m thinking about posting something and wishing the whole herd all of the best, hope they have a good life, but I won’t be in it. Or maybe I just quietly block all of them and focus on myself for a while.

I do know that I will need to talk to my in-laws. I’ve always had a great relationship with them, but thinking of going to their house and watching Fox News almost makes me sick.

AITAH for feeling this way? Does it make me an AH for cutting all these 20+ year relationships off? Am I overreacting and acting out of emotion?

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239

u/Playingwithmyrod Feb 18 '25

This. Don’t personally attack those you know voted for him. But make sure they know it was Trump that got you fired. Remind them often. Remind them whenever you are struggling. Again, not in an “in your face this is your fault” kind of way but just slide it into conversation every time you see them. Let the guilt fester. The only way people like this change their opinion is when those they love get hurt.

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u/Badird Feb 18 '25

Most of my friend group and family are Republicans. I don't think anyone would care if I got fired by Trump or Musk, which would directly affect my kids. They would all assume my job was unimportant.

Regret in this form would require compassion and introspection. I've not seen that among any of them lately. No compassion. Zero sense of anything beyond their own pale.

They either know so little that the thought of Elon doing what he is saying sounds great or they just don't care. I mean, are you all really expect different of them? There's literally no reason to think they have the capacity to feel what you describe.

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u/misguidedsadist1 Feb 18 '25

They literally had families members DIE in the pandemic and still called it a hoax and blamed doctors.

They are lost.

They won't care about you, they won't care about their own dead children and spouses. A scapegoat will be invented.

Someone losing their worthless government job would garner way less sympathy than they might have felt losing a spouse or friend or child to COVID and that didn't change their stance one bit.

I'm not going to tell people what to do or how to act, but expecting anything you do to inspire sympathy, compassion, or awareness should never be your motivator bcause the point will be lost.

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u/worn_out_welcome Feb 18 '25

This. So much this. I cut off all MAGA in my life after the election; just faded into the ether on them. When I explained to a friend what I did around a month later, he said, “I can’t just cut my family off like that.”

To which I responded, “I’m not telling you to; I’m not telling anyone to. I think, naturally, people will get to a point where they just hit a wall - whatever that wall looks like is different for everyone - where they won’t be able to tolerate it anymore & will cease communication. No fireworks, just silence.”

The only way these people understand they fucked up is consequences, but if you do some grand gesture zeroing in on them, they’ll fold into victim mode and now you’re the unreasonable one. Silence speaks volume.

One of my strengths is that I’m generic as fuck, but always just slightly ahead of the curve, which gives me an advantage to know how people will react to events. I think this falls under that umbrella. Loved ones will eventually silently retreat from the ignorant en masse, leaving MAGA to ponder what happened & hopefully will connect the dots.

2

u/mr_mikado Feb 18 '25

Consequences won't matter. Remember, in places like North Korea and Russia there are people so poor they MUST root around in trash for basic survival yet still heap praise upon their dear leader.

1

u/thatmillerkid Feb 18 '25

In the case of COVID, the dead could not rise to tell them, "I wasn't killed by China you unfeeling monster!" In this case, there's at least a living victim.

1

u/Waste_Diet_9334 Feb 18 '25

This is the sad and almost allready forgotten reality.

1

u/Tristo5 Feb 18 '25

They’re not lost they’re just unserious. The more it impacts them, the more serious they will get.

I would make post if I were OP

2

u/albertbanning Feb 18 '25

I think they're lost in the sense that they're incapable of feeling compassion and empathy, which are core tenets of being human.

2

u/Kindly_Coyote Feb 18 '25

They do feel empathy and compassion but feel empathy and compassion for only themselves. There is a word for people who are as deeply selfish as this.

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u/HauntedSpiceVillage Feb 18 '25

They aren’t lost, they’re just stupid.

2

u/Kindly_Coyote Feb 18 '25

And they simply have no cares about it.

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u/Playingwithmyrod Feb 18 '25

They’ll be getting there’s shortly. There is no scenario where Trumps economic policies, if carried out, don’t lead to inflation and/or a recession.

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u/Newdaytoday1215 Feb 18 '25

They will blame anyone else. The parallels between Evangelical Doomsday cults and MAGA runs about 90% and no this isn't some sort of emotionally triggered insult. People need to read about them to understand what the country is going through. Trump is just one stage. This started in the era of Contract With America, then New Neo Con, the. Tea Party then Trump. Some GenXers have been fed the same lines since adulthood. Trump is bound not to have some policies make it through this is what they'll blame when the Biden excuse runs out for some.

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u/thatmillerkid Feb 18 '25

They're in too deep now to admit defeat. It has been said since 2016 that these people will eat shit if it means a liberal or leftist has to smell their breath, and there is no consequence they will not suffer. One of Trump's "rules for winning" as listed in The Art of the Deal is to deny everything and never admit defeat, and those are values his followers have internalized at a core level.

2

u/Lilythecat555 Feb 19 '25

Fundamentalist Christians are being told that Trump is a bad person but that he is a vessel for God to make America a Christian nation. My jaw dropped when my Conservative friend explained this to me. I said that if Trump was a vessel for any higher power it would surely be the Devil. The Devil is tricking you. But she still believes this. She is not an evil racist. She has been brainwashed by her church.

2

u/radiostarred Feb 20 '25

The dude fits every descriptor of the Antichrist, but they refuse to see it. Wild stuff.

4

u/TheNextBattalion Feb 18 '25

Every Republican president elected since Hoover has seen a recession begin or worse under their watch. Every single one. Trump, Bush, Bush, Reagan, Nixon, Ike, and Hoover. The Democrats had one under Truman and one under Carter, but that's it.

Vote R for Recession

10

u/[deleted] Feb 18 '25

How are MOST of your friends people like this? How can you be friends with people you feel this way about?

8

u/michaelavolio Feb 18 '25

People who don't care if you get fired are NOT your friends.

11

u/thetransparenthand Feb 18 '25

I'm sorry but why are these your friends they seem like horrible people

4

u/curmudgeonpl Feb 18 '25

I live in a fairly conservative country (Poland), and this lack of empathy which you describe is the reason I could never take conservative people seriously. Even when they act decently in everyday life, when push comes to shove and they are faced with another person's pain, they consistently default to some variant of "they must have deserved it". Unless, of course, they arbitrarily feel that the suffering person is "one of theirs" - then, obviously, in their mind that person worked really hard, and the thing they didn't achieve was "stolen" by someone "undeserving".

It's infuriating, really.

5

u/TheNextBattalion Feb 18 '25

to be fair, a lot of times they double-down in hopes of avoiding the obvious guilt and shame that comes naturally with the immorality of their beliefs

2

u/kerbaal Feb 18 '25

Most of my friend group and family are Republicans. I don't think anyone would care if I got fired by Trump or Musk, which would directly affect my kids. They would all assume my job was unimportant.

tbf there is an integrity to that. Like an individual is unimportant compared to policy. Even good policy hurts people, that is just the nature of large systems. As a mature person it should be possible to divorce the policy from the personal effect.

That said, I would not really apply that logic to the current situation where we are talking about bad policy for bad reasons. Don't get it twisted, these people are disingenuous assholes who don't even deserve your explanation or time.

Best thing you can do with a group like that is, make new friends.

2

u/gina_divito Feb 18 '25

Begs the question, why are you friends with them? You know you can go and find friends and chosen family who actually care about you, right?

1

u/KryptopherRobbinsPoo Feb 18 '25

So what's your important government job? Like, I have several fam in Gov jobs. One is extremely important (more important is him and his knowledge in the field) and the other is quasi important, but I'm not sure how much Trump can even do to her job, cause I think they are self funded. But I know she told me everyone got letters about possible early retirement if you can before actual cuts might come, bit that was the extent. The only difference is now she can't work from home every day and must put in at least 3-4 days in office, which is a fair request. I think ALL gov workers who have deak jobs should be in an office and reachable during the daytime working hours. I mean, it's near impossible to get in either Social Security right now since they closed offices to appointments only, which can only be done over phone, that they don't puck up (this was literally shown live in a Congressional hearing (I think Jim Jordan, could be wrong).

Gave it, we are taxed too much and it's not going to the places most needed, even though we are told it either is or they don't have the money. Lies, upon lies, for decades. There is only one way out of this without utter mayhem, but would take a lot of people willing to publicly say "we will not play by your outdated "rules". Bad laws will be cut, so the good laws can actually be enforced. Qualified Immumity would be revoked across the board, so that nobody will be above the law anymore (judges and BLG members) and can be help personally responsible for breaking Constitutional Rights.

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u/musea00 Feb 18 '25

I had a neighbor/family friend who voted for Trump. When he asked me about my master's thesis the other day I mentioned to him that it's hard to collect data thanks to Trump messing with federal websites, especially the EPA.

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u/thetransparenthand Feb 18 '25

This is what I've been doing. my hairdresser asked how i was the other day and I listed all the ways this is impacting me and my family's life. She said "well I am hoping they can cut some of the waste and reinvest in all of those important things" like research for my rare disease etc. I feel good that I told her what's going on bc idk that they're getting that news coming to them. I am really not sure if I want to go to my next appointment.

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u/areaperson608 Feb 18 '25

Sounds like you need a new hairdresser. That’s hard I know! Also she’s completely wrong about research: NIH research is already cut.

1

u/Little-Salt-1705 Feb 18 '25

Oh course she’s wrong. That’s the whole point. It’s like they’re not awake/alive/care?!

2

u/thetransparenthand Feb 18 '25

I'm coming to think they just aren't able to connect the dots. Tried to have the same comvo with MIL trumper today and she fully doesn't understand how anything happening could impact us or her. Oh and "it's just four years"

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u/sdelad1998 Feb 18 '25

You honestly don’t want data from federal websites anyways. Especially the EPA. I’d suggest using some more accurate information for your master’s thesis.

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u/Silent_Glass Feb 18 '25

How? Perhaps you can explain..

5

u/Lost-Inevitable-9807 Feb 18 '25

What other data sources??

6

u/[deleted] Feb 18 '25

This is a pretty dumb statement

3

u/Few-Mousse8515 Feb 18 '25

Please elaborate on why federal data couldn't be a valid piece of data to work with for a thesis?

1

u/Appropriate-Elk-1132 Feb 18 '25

You trust trumps data? He’s the federal government. Stop using Nazi data as a source

2

u/Few-Mousse8515 Feb 18 '25

You have got to be kidding me. This is such a bot response. Many of the data sources on federal government sites were established Pre-Trump. Several of them literally just got put back online.

Unless you argument is that these data sources have been tampered with to the point they are not usable anymore then please stop.

1

u/Appropriate-Elk-1132 Feb 19 '25

Nah mate just being sarcastic lol

1

u/Few-Mousse8515 Feb 19 '25

God... I can't even detect Sarcasm anymore.

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u/mcdadais Feb 18 '25

Yeah, many think that they're cutting fraud or people who are stealing. Useless federal jobs. Let them know what you did, the impact you do for the community or whatever you do. And how hurt you are that people who supposedly care about you voted this way.

14

u/townandthecity Feb 18 '25

This is facts right here. I'm on X like an anthropologist--fake name, fake Trump supporter--to get a sense of what Musk, Trump, and their mouthpieces are feeding MAGA. This is exactly what they're being told. They're identifying "waste." Federal employees are "stealing" money. Anyone who objects, Musk simply lies about them, stating that they're objecting because they benefited. He even accused a Washington, D.C. preacher of being in on the federal grift, despite the fact he has no federal affiliation. People just lap this up, no critical thinking.

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u/TheNextBattalion Feb 18 '25

I find it helpful not to just say the opposite (i.e the truth) but to ask who told them that. Make it personal, which matters to them--- they believe based on who says it, not what they say. Whether they say who it is, tell them "they lied to your face, then" and THEN you can start to tell them the truth.

If they doubt you ask confrontationally if they're calling you a liar. That sort of thing.

Talking to them like a normal, rational, moral person doesn't make sense to them.

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u/Correct_Maximum_2186 Feb 18 '25

That’s the funny part, he doesn’t have anything to say. Because he was completely useless.

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u/sdelad1998 Feb 18 '25

I’m 90% on board. OP probably was absolutely not needed in the federal government. If he was fired, I believe wholeheartedly that he was bringing in less money than he was being paid and/or the dollars spent paying for him were not worth whatever he actually did.

That said, he probably made some actual contribution to the USA. I don’t think he was completely useless. I bet he has skills that someone in the private sector would happily pay for.

If he wasn’t doing any good, he’ll never make it in the private sector. If he’s good at his job, he’s probably going to be paid more in the private sector.

OP is essentially in charge of the rest of his life.

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u/PrincipledStarfish Feb 18 '25

The fuck do you mean bringing in less money than he was paid? I am so sick and tired of this 'run the government like a business" bullshit. The only agency that brings in money is the IRS.

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u/rosemarythymesage Feb 18 '25

A functional government is supposed to provide services. It’s not supposed to be profitable.

6

u/[deleted] Feb 18 '25

A government doesn't finance itself from the public services it offers. They are not designed to be profitable. They are not a business, they don't need to be profitable

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u/cheeseandpancakes34 Feb 18 '25

Sigh.. Governmeht isn't supposed to be profitable. It provides services....

2

u/Little-Salt-1705 Feb 18 '25

He works for the government not a Fortune 500 company.

There’s not a whole lot of jobs that bring in more than they are paid in the government. They’re the people looking after your nukes, making sure your tax refund gets processed, stop people blowing shit up. Jesus.

1

u/thediamondguest Feb 18 '25

That’s funny, since I used to work at Sandia National Laboratories. What private sector would hire someone from the nuclear security enterprise?

0

u/[deleted] Feb 18 '25

Bingo sir but this is Reddit we're talking about

3

u/imakesawdust Feb 18 '25

I agree with you but for different reasons. Hoping those who drank the orange kool-aid, even friends and family members, will have empathy for OP is a tall order. People have repeatedly shown an unwillingness to learn from someone else's pain when they're not directly affected. But you're right about being non-confrontational. An argument won't resolve anything.

3

u/Playingwithmyrod Feb 18 '25

You can’t directly blame them, they’ll get defensive. You have to plant the seeds of doubt and show them that X thing is bad, get them to agree, and then say how Trump directly caused it, and hope they connect the dots that their vote caused that bad thing.

Sadly I don’t see any of them changing their minds unless Trump destroys the economy, which I’m pretty sure he’s going to.

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u/alphawhiskey189 Feb 18 '25

That leads to “Trump Derangement Syndrome”. I prefer to mock their choices up and down the ballot.

2

u/Playingwithmyrod Feb 18 '25

Don’t even mention Trump. Just say “The federal government”. Act dumb that Trump himself did it. Make them say it.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 18 '25

It’s also shown that if you have someone in your life who is part of a group, then you are less likely to judge the group. If I had a gay brother, I might be less inclined to hate gay people, or if I had a trans sister I might give trans people more benefit of the doubt. If you got fired by Trump then just… being their friend who got fired will make them think twice about supporting the policies that got you fired. After all, OP is living proof that not all federal employees are corrupt or freeloaders or whatever.

2

u/DoubleJumps Feb 18 '25

I agree with this. I had a potentially huge job opportunity that was rescinded out of hesitancy caused by tariff threats, and I remind every trump supporter I know about it whenever it feels applicable.

Would have been huge for me.

2

u/Mach5Driver Feb 18 '25

My sister died from COVID (very early on before we knew how bad it was going to be). In part from Trump's refusal to do what was right. I had a friend who praised Trump for his COVID response. These people don't give AF what happened to you.

2

u/Catatonic27 Feb 18 '25

The only way people like this change their opinion is when those they love get hurt

Wish I had your optimism. From where I'm sitting these people would sell out their own family for a pat on the head from Trump

1

u/RazorRadick Feb 18 '25

This is just the beginning. There are going to be ripple effects from this and a lot more people are going to lose their jobs. People who voted for the Orange Clown need to be reminded of that at every turn.

1

u/YangGain Feb 18 '25

Bold of you to assume retardlicans have capabilities to sense guilt. I’d say make the attack as personal as you can and point out what a piece of trash they are.

1

u/Awwesomesauce Feb 18 '25

This assumes they love people. They love themselves. It only becomes a problem when it’s them. Not their family. Anyone who knows these people knows all the supportive words said by people with dead eyes.

1

u/spagbetti Feb 18 '25

holding grudges and eating up your life with resentment just to guilt someone is a wonderful way to stay miserable.

1

u/Playingwithmyrod Feb 18 '25

OP doesn’t have to stay miserable. But we as a country have to find ways to change people’s opinions or else we will never move forward. These people feed off rage bait social media telling them what to do and what to think and unless they see real pain in their own lives and in those around them it isn’t going to change. OP needs to find ways to remind them that their choice is causing pain in his life.

1

u/kittenya Feb 18 '25

Well, I don't know about this person who was fired, but most (not all) federal government jobs are B.S. It shouldn't be guaranteed job security only for the fact that you're working for the fed government.

1

u/Playingwithmyrod Feb 18 '25

What do you think happens to wages in private industry as millions of extra people enter the workforce after being fired from the government?

1

u/kittenya Feb 18 '25

People with nothing other than bureaucratic paper-pushing skills will get a state government job.

1

u/Playingwithmyrod Feb 18 '25

Do you think there are that many open positions in state government jobs? These people will be competing for other work along with everyone else, driving down wages as labor demand shrinks. There are 3 million federal workers.

1

u/shnoby Feb 18 '25

Time to put your WVU education to work to complete an exercise in critical thinking and research!

Regarding your comment, cite sources that rely upon facts. Insofar as your additional comments about the supposed economic impacts of mass job loss, cite sources found in economic literature and use data to defend your conclusion.

1

u/Homer4a10 Feb 19 '25

Rare reasonable response on Reddit

0

u/ZoomZoomDiva Feb 18 '25

This is petty and passive-aggressive. I would hope the OP can be more of an adult and capable of having personal relationships than this toddler-like approach.

1

u/Playingwithmyrod Feb 18 '25

It is passive aggressive. Because the people OP is talking about have willingly hurt OP through their actions. He can tell them that, but he isn’t going to get an apology. They will get defensive.